benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly…鸠昱隆嘉











last night i spent 3 hour in the cafe i registered a card member and costed 5 yuan,but the clerk girl said with every 10 yuan deposit there is a 5 yuan discount,so i paid in fact 1 yuan an hour as they claimed when i bought it.i wonderred in the dorm how to let posting to wordpress.com automatically via blog client.blogwriter i adopt don’t allowed setting proxy while the ie proxy setting was blocked in the cafe and normal access to http://www.wordpress.com was blocked.i went to bed at 1:07 am.i got up at 7:35 am and felt energetic and headed to farer place along the street to avoid dog’s concentrated hacking,as i planed last night.then the all day spent in a far cafe ,without lunch,worked till after 5 pm.dog biting here almost all time.i had no time to review but just busy with typing and clicking.i later found a solution to post within firefox and i will try immediatly.
bye.i don’t know how i can afford the expense today,but i worked with fruits.i love u .kiss u with bear.

powered by performancing firefox



{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 8

Thursday, December 21, 2006

a pale day

in the morning, i registered myself another blog to synchron at http://www.bloglines.com/blog/benzillar .dog blocked access to bloglines.com and i had to access it via proxy.in the night i registered myself other 2 accounts at wordpress.com at https://benzillar.wordpress.com and http://benzyrnill.wordpress.com .wordpress.com was blocked and the ie settings baned to modify so it let my blogwriter can’t find the right confiugrations for the 2 accounts.they tried to vendor me an card for a discount of 1 yuan an hour as member for the convinience to monitor my web serfing more detailedly.
when i arrived my baby slept in the arms of the kid sister,who was watching cop soup.i then operated on my pda for awhile.then his mother returned and we had lunch.the kid sister occupied tv with cop soup while eating.in the afternoon my baby played tapwater for some time.when its almost 3 pm he asked for haunted outside.so i held him enter the sports yard where some students there having their skate class on the ice.then my baby directed me to go the direction toward the railway.we passed the undreground market between the plaza and the railway station.then we went to the railway telecom,where dog threaten us but we had some good time on our own.at dinner the dish was again the motton with vegetables,the same of lunch and last time i visited.the kid sister kept silent and after dinner she went to bed to rest.we couples played with our baby for some time and let him happy.the kid son of the kid sister arrived later and started to shut the door to do his homeworks.my baby insisted to haunt the room sometimes.i tired to let him stay in our bedroom.i then understood when my baby and his mother alone suffered loneliness and challenge of silence by the mother and son of my baby’s mother’s relatives.1 or 2 times when i suddenly arrived there i watched the room for my baby now occupied by the mother and her kid son locked and my baby’s mother held him played in the dark waiting room.i really sorry for my baby and his mother to let they suffered.however,we r expecting brighter future.
bye.i spent a lot of extra time tonight by dog’s hacking which let the surfing slowly and pages error-prone.i love u.kiss u with tear.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

warming sun,crisp fog in the morning air

last night before coming here again to upload my backup of firefox with plugins and blogwriter to my google after 8 pm i buzzed my baby’s mother and she allowed me to visit my baby today.my baby also loudly accquainted me in the phone.for my grand father manifest himself in my dream vividly last night his first night in earth and on heaven,i so came here to write it down before i went to see my baby.last night i read ‘thinking on the web’ till 0:01 am.the ambient let me know i was highly evaluated and bubbled a lot of joy in the background.i slept with conpact dreams.i dreamed first the couple whose wife was a fateteller,a woman smokes and seldom chore in family name mao,and whose husband with first name chunsheng(born in spring) and family name likely of zhu,for our village all of zhus’.they commented on my charactor and i contended that i m competitive.my dad,in his late life be close friend of the mao before she passed after her husband left in advance,watched aside complaisantly.then i dreamed i was,or the guy in dream’s focus was,the 3rd prince of east sea king in chinese,or the 3 son of sea god in western.a daughter of dragon,longnv in chinese,loved the guy or me and tried to follow him or me but the protagonist didn’t admit.then my dad fired some wood to warm us and let us feeding fishes.later we fried fishes to eat,with some white people.an even longer dream of that evaded me after i trying to memory the dream after i woke up.i got up at 9:37 am.
its a nice morning.the sun was mild and kindling.the road was left with some white dust,likely frost or light snow.the air is crisp and moist.my heart was full of freshing spirit of holy.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bear.

pale day

dog at noon let the monitor in the cafe frequently blacked out and flashed to normal,indicating they want to adopt old skill to ruin my writings half way when i wrote in blogwriter.that surely threaten my blog ,now that gmail which auto saved when u type was frequently blocked and instable.
all afternoon i spent on bed,first listening radio,then dozed awhile.threats near ahead but god let it all a miniature of his spiteful road leading me ahead toward him.
bye.i likely can succeed to finished my work within an hour tonight.i backup firefox with plugins and upload to my google accout,and this time very speedy.thx god.
i love u.after dinner i buzzed my hometown and talked with my kid sister and my youngest elder sister with whom i spent a lot of time when we r children.i also talked with her husband.our father’s funeral was markable splendid.that let me relieved.kiss u with freer.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

pale sunshine in pale cloud sea

last night i read my blog on my pda after 0 am.i reviewed my elder sister told me my dad refused to eat several days before he left.at the same time i and my baby shitted waterily.this morning i got up 11:36 am.when i arrived the canteen there herds of qrrser there eating.the female administartor again complained offering my 4 dishes and suggested i should hand in 4 yuan to pay.i again ditched the dirty dish of belly manually.after lunch i woundering if i should buzzed my hometown there likely holding ceremony to let my grand father bodily slept in earth.but i finally didn’t buzz but come here instead.my father in the heaven knows my silence and my stubborn.
www.33367.com , where i got some ebooks,now was blocked from me after i refered it in my blog.dog busy with hunting and enjoyed it totally,till its death.the world had to get rid of it.
bye.in this sole morning i had nothing dear except u can enhence my family.god let me have u.i love u.kiss u with bear.

a sunny cool day again

last night after posted in the cafe and returned to the dorm i suddenly felt i should spare no effort to return to my hometown to attend my grand father’s funeral ceremony.i buzzed my baby’s mother but no one there.so i went over by bike and found the line misworked.then i surfed,trying to find if air travel available now that i had only a day ahead to catch up the ceremony.dog blocked heavily and infected my pc.i finally decided not to return when i power down the pc.when i buzzed my hometown again after returned to the dorm i was told that my grand father was already turned into ashes by fire,as demanded by the local rule.its already after 11 pm when i settled in the dorm,i read awhile my blog on my pda.when its 0:03 am i laid my pda aside and prepared to rest.i went to bed at about 0:37 am.i slept sound and when i looked at the clock its already 7:46 am and i got up at 8:06 am.when i arrived my baby walking in the waiting room while the kid sister watching tv.my baby almost didn’t left my arms or shoulders in the day.i sang a lot,esp. ‘beiguozhichun’ and its my first time recently years i recite fully its lyric with the aid of my pda.my baby slept for about half of an hour in the morning.we ate an ice cream when waiting for his mother leaving her school.at noon i felt cold and dozed awhile while his mother cared him.after his mother left my baby cried for me and refused the kid sister who tried to calmed him down.so i got up caring him.we wandered peacefully some time but when i kissed his ear he cried.i told myself he was crying instead of me for my grand father,his granddad.since senior middle school i startled to cry after captured by bookstore worker for i tried to steal a chinese martial book to enrich my collection of chinese qigong(practise of breathing) and wushu(martial),i seemingly cried seldom,except when i broke my heart for girl fang(square),in my second being mad i cried for my ancestor and my profound blood background.and except my third time being mad i cried for i can’t protect my baby son against evil.my baby son this time cried instead of me and reward me,in my view.after i got know his mother due for night class i decided to hold my baby haunted once outside before receiving his mother,for i found my baby now lacks of his favorite candy.we visited shenlong (cult dragon) supermarket where i bought him jelly,milk candy,sausage,sunflower seeds.and on the way he asked me to buy him some dates.he enjoyed them very much,even the saleswomen let me sensed my humble financial situation.i never seeing my baby so placated when i fed him with sunflower seeds.he tapped his feet on the floor while sat on the plastic mat.i love him so much.with my god of my grand father watching me now from the heaven,i love him solely as i devoted to my god.after we went to received his mother at 6 pm he got unconfortable on the way near our building then slept on my shoulders till his mother lately fetched us.his mother again blamed my letting him sleep in the cold and started to milked him.when the kid sister urged to have dinner,i ate first and found the atmosphere dirty,likely her son challenged me.i don’t why where went wrong while i chatted with him actively.after dinner i prepared some sample of the food i bought for my baby,intending to lay them in my dorm room for sacrifice to my grand father who has the last night bodily in our home in my hometown,but my baby refused to let me fetch.so i told his mother i needn’t any more,for her home is exactly my home.i left with blank hand and blank heart for my grand father.

dog desperate for death challenge now.last night they block my upload for quite some time,and this time they let my downloading my backup of my firefox and blogwriter on my googlepages failed for several times.last night rotten rat rabbled constantly in neighbor room exactly till i went to bed.dog now again block my uploading my backup to my google account.they just want to see sooner their death.
bye.i love u.kiss u with tear.

Monday, December 18, 2006

a sunny cool day

my grand father,as my kid brother who returned to our hometown from guangdong,south china where he tried to find a living there,told me when i buzzed in after dinner for 3 times,2 times occupied,has passed.i never felt a pain so far.i just felt pity,for both of us.i admired to show him i can with my best to appease him,for so many years since my growth he kept silence to my performance,i want to show him i faith to him and deep love him and worshiped him.many times recently i want to talk to him but always retarded by the inconvinience as my mother claimed that he was on bed for coldness in hubei prov.quite sometimes i want to let myself remembered to buzz him better in afternoon for at that time he likely will get up and my mother also suggested a time in a phone that she can wait for my phone in that period time in a day but i constantly forgot to buzz in afternoon,ie,in sunshine.long time i missed his youth and middle age years as legends in the heaven,in the road straightened for god.
my kid brother told me my grand father left around 2 pm,at that time i fought with dog’s blocks my upload my backup of blogwriter.exe and firefox with plugins i needed for a convinient working environment to my google account less i had to bring udisk or some cafe refuse udisks.they let me spent an additional hour here a dirty cafe.at that time my grand father watching my restless struggles with pests and he can know the world he was to is rather easy with handling these kind of rubbish.he can know his son doomed to clean the kind of rubbish from his land,his kingdom in half of an century,with his grandson,with his ever prosporous offspring,with the behalf of his glory.god,u know even in this saint moment dog still biting me.in a heaven u know i needn’t move a finger of mine to let them evaporate like fog in bubble,but now on this futile earth i had to conbat with full of my source.on this land of dog stained and evil poluted,i need ur guide and companion,as i dreamed for many times.in a conversation in later summer,i asked u in the phone where i can find u after u left,u didn’t reply,or i can’t hear what u told;in a talk in a phone i asked if u r in family name of zhu as me,u didn’t reply or i can’t hear what u told.i at least gain ur help when i lost assurance after thiefs in the dorm let me cold and leaking,u told me it doesn’t matter.i recovered the next day.
father,my god,u held dear ur comments onto me so much,let me grown sound and selfrelied.so many years u let me wonder at large,letting me so many years later retrospect ur road and followed ur footsprint for ur source,ur memory in the world,ur testimony upon the visible and sensible as god’s singularity.god,less the world doesn’t memory,less the men don’t reason,u r always in my heart.i m ur son,ur third son,as u r the third son of my grandfather.i picked ur figure and ur face shape ,i admire i m urs.i took ur dream,took ur vow,i took the kingdom of u,i picked the land u seeing and let it blossoms like forever spring and summer in the most serene valley,that’s my vow,my deed of u.
god,if there is a way,god,if there r reasons.if there is a sideway to ur front,if there is a channel can talk to u.god,my father,if i can hear u,if i can serv u.god,let me know.let me know where i can touch u,god.god,u holy spirit shrined me everytime,but i still need to talk with my father,with my dear father silent so many years.god,i follow ur way without any hesitation,god,i listen ur command without any obscure.god,i need seeing my father,my god.god,in this position i stood too long,god,i need appeasing my father his proud his proud.god,if there is a way,god,if there r reasons.
god,i don’t know how many year i will kept my sorrow for not attending my father’s leaving,i don’t know pains will how tear my heart for missing him,my grand father.god,i know ur mercy to all these.
bye.i love u,dear zhou,my girl,my long waited my second wife to appease my grand father but failed.i love u.kiss u with heart.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

bright sunshine in the morning

last night i started to read ‘thinking on the web’ earlier after watching my baby’s 2 photos i bought with me.i rested on 0:17 am and hadn’t any problem to fall into sleep.i woke up after 7 am but got up lately after 10:29 am.then i went to the tree yard to sunbath.its cool while refreshing.a man with his doggie wandering around me and the man kept striking his foot.after i strode for an of hour some girls returned to their dorm from the door toward the qrrs hospital,likely for they r doctors or doctors in practise there.they went directly to a pub to have lunch.then i know why the canteen sees few customers recently and why the admini;strators a bit hostile to me.maybe my presence hurts somebody,but i had no weakness in the following god.
after lunch my baby’s mother buzzed in and told me my kid sister and his wife buzzed her to let me know my grand father being on bed for some time.i again disblieved.but she said the wife of my kid sister told her my dad fell onto the bed even before she left qiqihar.i told her several days ago i buzed my mother and she told me my dad was well,and on bed for several days for its cold.storms may brewing.but with my father,my god,i had nothing to bother.
i enjoyed this cafe so far.its speedy,even dog definitely monitored me now.and os let autocomplete function working as normal,unlike in the 3 cafes near the dorm zone all disabled it to let me type more.
bye.i love u.kiss u with brim.

sunny lasted all day.

the cafe i posted at noon told me i had to pay 4 yuan even i spent 2
more hours there,for the price of its service increased to 1.5 yuan an
hour.so i now in a even farer cafe in whose first time service to me i
found lyric of ‘beiguozhichun’ via www.altavista.com some days ago.its
price now still 1 yuan an hour,which let me at a relief.maybe dog now
attempting to hinder my time on web,finding how i enjoyed and made
real usage of the web.
today its turned a bit colder,with which i first time felt cold and
even sore in my leg bone.when i returned to the dorm the sunshine over
the wall of the building,not letting me enjoyed it possible.however,i
jogged in the morning just before lunch time.i spent the rest of the
afternoon on bed listening the radio.i have not too much to review,so
i can’t name out what in my review.when its dark outside i started to
walked in the room and rotten rat nearby started to bite
heavily,letting me open the door to wash it.dinner was enough,the
female administrator made a complain by claiming i had 4 dishes.but
the customers was few even its on time for dinner,ie.,5 pm.i finished
it without any remnant.
its likely a peaceful day,even changes inevitable will be launched by
dog,in god’s view.i hope i can see u sooner.yesterday my baby’s mother
told me my second elder sister buzzed there to let me see my grand
father,saying he was ill.i didn’t believe,for i think my dad knowing
my struggle,knowing the process i moulding our kingdom as he
envised.and in addition when i buzzed my hometown the same day my
mother didn’t told me that,even she unhappy with me.i love my
hometown,the mountains,the lake,the stream,the rock,the soil,the air
and the sunshine.i love the bushes,as well as the rice fields.that
exactly liked the poem i read last night,’Paradise Lost’ of John
Milton.i missed the south,but the north here i worked so long is also
the lost paradise of my kingdom,with which i to recover and to
recliam.i believe my father knowing me.
bye.i love u.like picnic in summer sunset.like sunbath on the beach.i
need u to rest,like a long time journey to pass the triumph message,as
a herald.i need ur thick hairs to cover my drought nose,to forget the
chore and bearings.kiss u with light.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

bright sun in pale blue sky

last night i wonered in room till 11 pm.then i picked <thinking on the web> and till 1:02 i laid it aside.the ambient let me know my works reevaluated and tired to capture me with contentment.that let my reading in low speed.when i went to urine before going to bed,the tv room was shut and the corridor was all empty.i fell into sleep smoothly.i got up at 10:28 am and reviewed a couples each after a broken marriage with a girl and a boy respectively,trying to offer restaurant service just near the dorm when its not organized into qrrs’ dorm zone and there r lots of single flat house among the buildings of qrrs 2 dorms.they r so poor when their restaurant near its close,only left me and another guy haunted there frequently.quite some persons have nothing in the world,but they need something to busy to be fed and play in the running process in the world.i don’t know what they now made a living,and i don’t know how many people suffered the killing winter now,the media seldom now reports bare poverity,and i don’t think the gov. can manage to feed chinese people when the spotlight focused onto the wellbings earning bucks,seemed honest earnings comparing with the american,and the shitting babble around the world of the head.
this time i likely spent a lot after i tried my account at http://benzillar.stumbleupon.com and adding www.pcmag.com to my google personal homepage.
bye.i love u.kiss u with fear.
btw,in the post titled ‘sunny afternoon ‘ posted Dec. Friday, 15 there is a line ‘that’s the failure of insanity of tribe cognation via uncontroled immigrate.’ where ‘cognation’ should be ‘amalgamation’.and in a recent post i refered Nash as an physical scientist but he in fact an economics scientist.

slightly snowed last night,full sunny day

last night i roamed in the room for quite some time.after finding neighbors hacking on my mind i let the door open and continued to strode.then quite some guys leaving, passing the tv room facing my room and picked their heads into the tv room around 10 pm.i stayed wondering till 11:30 pm when i started to read ‘thinking on the web’ and rested on 0:01 am.dog let me almost lost sleep but finally i fell into sleep.i got up at 9:17 am.before i uncovered the curtain i suddenly sensed it might snowed,and after seeing the sunshine from the window i saw slight snow on the ground.what can i complain about?god let me know i only need do what i liked and responded and left rubbishes all aside to be cleaned by the superpower.
when i arrived the grandmom there already.my baby walking on the waiting room.after i uncoated he approached me and soon i cared him playing with tea pot and tea cups of his mother’s,as the presents from her once students.he broke 3 tea cups.we ate pine nuts.he received the nuts i broke for him but later spitted it out and i ate them instead.we left the home for his mother after 11 am and i sang loudly qianbaihui’s ‘cafee cafe’ along the road for hundred times while my baby slept on my shoulders outside of the school in sunshine.when the students leaving some of them shouted and let my baby wake up.we entered the school to receive his mother.after lunch the old sisteres left to buy winter clothes for theirselves while i backup logos i designed to my pda.my baby’s mother urged me speedy to hold our baby to have vaccined.she left in advance to fetch the log book she left in her office.my baby in the way asked me to buy him an icecream.when we met his mother she got annoyed and demanded my leaving.i left but in half way returned to the hospital for i think that’s better.my baby cried shortly,but on the way home he seemed crabbed and cried a lot.after getting home his mother again abused me and demanded my leaving.i retorted to let her be well poised.then i started to back my blog to my pda while my baby sent to sleep after milked with his mother.when i left to shower in public bathroom,my baby woke up and i saw him awhile while his mother milked him.when i returned to the home the old sister started to cook.a girl student tutored by my baby’s mother leaving.my baby tightly in his mother’s arms.i drank a tin of bear.his mother busy with tutoring the kid son of her aunt and a boy of her colleague.after dinner i waited awhile while the old sisters urged my baby played with me while his mother eating.for them time is ripe to seperate my baby from me and set my baby under their affiliation.when i left my baby didn’t see my leaving against the old sisters urging,with his back to the door.
its a nice day after all.i likely had to spend more money on the canteen,and likely had to hold a more tightened budget on the web.maybe that’s the dog’s plot.last night they close conbatted with me.they let my gmail via http error-prone,and i switched to https of gmail,adopting secure channel of http against surveilance my gmail content.then they cut off gmail connection,let both http and https of gmail inaccessible.then i google proxy list and tired 3 or 4 proxies,some proxy tunnel displaying arriving contents of my gmail then being cut off.they domineering to its brutalest.then when i logout my google services and all went losing response.then i reset the pc and left.dog just need a way,no matter how tiny or trifle,no matter how shabby and barely,to conpensate their losing and failing feelings to proof their inferior.
bye.i love u.in tear and in seal.kiss u with ties.

Friday, December 15, 2006

sunny afternoon

at noon i got what i wanted for some time but were blocked so long: the lyric of ‘beiguozhichun(spring of north country) and zoundery blogwriter.after i got them dog gave up blocks to www.goolge.com and proxies.i even surfed the www.zoundery.com which was blocked for several days even its appeared in the results of various searching engine.what can i comment all about it?
after posted here at noon i meandered awhile in the sunshine then went to renew my magzines borrowed from qrrs.but the libray was locked.i went to the newspaper room to read.the librarains put some of them on for a show and soon i heared rehearsal in the stadium.a worker behind the glass wall pretending sleeping on the table kept dirty onto me,but i finished reading to ‘world reference digest’ in time.the president of iran claim israel wouldn’t exist in the future,american finance ministry to visit china and world ,esp former high ranks of german praised china a lot and look upon china’s continuous rapid growth driving world growth.that’s skepticism and opportunism.old europe long time used to be gambling on both sides.that’s why they ignited the 2 world wars and they tended to seduce the third one.us had trouble to calm down momies’ cries for their lost sons,even the sons died worthily,and let the world retreat to accept its bitter and bitter output.that’s the failure of insanity of tribe cognation via uncontroled immigrate.
returned to the dorm i roamed in the room for about an hour,leting the radio on.at diiner i was offered 3 or 4 picecs of meat and i enjoyed my meal.after dinner i buzzed my hometown and want to talked to my grand father but my mother told me i needn’t talked to him,who had been on bed for several days,for he is too old.i felt a little bit hostility in the tone of my mother.
that’s my day today.boring and trifle.but i counted it for our bright future,like cat bite his paws in unrefrained thirt.
bye.i love u.near and far.kiss u with tear and bear.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

sunny morning

its sunny however.last night in the cafe i first visited i finally got the lyric of beiguozhichun(the spring of north country) just before i left.i skimmed it awhile and elapsed extra 5 minute and was charged 0.5 yuan in addition.right i got zoundery blog writer now and write within it to post.dog already let the pc popup a err box to threaten my blogging via it.
last night i read my blog and later ‘thinking on the web’ till 1:47 am.rotten rats nearby again urged me to rest in advance but i kept at guard.in addition the book quite informative.i got know in searching engine design domain there r quite some battle concerning the artificial intellectual techonogy,and likely lazy chinese dotcom to lose,no matter the official how to promoted it via blocking google and other searching engin.this morning i woke up at 9:41 am and got up at 10:30.and i was under attacked before i woke up.after getting up their force let me sat in silence.they sued me my relation with my baby.dog’s eyes set everyone foul licker,that’s nothing specail.at lunch they again offered me dirty dish of stuff of belly of pork or bull or sheep with a lot of spices to hide its smelly,even i spilt several times.i know the male administrative likely in family name of sun,gathering ill willes against me for some time.and they just challenge their boldness to death.
bye.i love u this morning.i love u in still.last night my pda told me by quoting shakespear’s, all true love run no smooth.i was assured so much.kiss u with bear.

pale sunshine.

last night i went to bed early just after 10 pm.i slept sound and got
up at 11:29 am.in the dawn i dreamed my best friend of
alumni,qiuxiaolin,and his once girlfriend,longhanjiang (dragon pertain
river) visited me.qiu told me their relation now breaking.i tried to
use our poor camera to shot them but Ms long constantly changed her
poise to challenge the poor camera which had problem to capture moving
object.all my sickness disappeared after the extroadinary long
sleep.so i hasted to see my baby.my baby almost didn’t sleep in the
moring.lunch i almost eat less.i had a quarrel with my baby’s mother
who echoed the kid sister and frequently blocked my baby playing
objects he liked to play,in the case a bag of suger,i told her she
should do her best to allow my baby to play what he want to play.the
afternoon spent playing tapwater,pc,grid frame of window and powder of
body smother.the kid sister left for shopping some time.after she
returned my baby got sleepy but he just can’t fall into sleep,likely
at guard.the kid sister babbled persuadings aside frequently and after
the grandmom arrived she claimed even i can’t let my baby sleep.but i
know just her ill will let my baby alert at sleeping.the grandmom
brought some cold dishes,likely remnants of a banquet.they fed my baby
with some and i launched a quarrel to urge the kid sister not feed my
baby many times except 3 meals with his parents.they didn’t
rebuked.then we went to receive his mother.my baby asked me to bought
him a stick of sugar grape and a stick of fried susage.when children
of the teachers entered the yard of the school we slided in.when my
baby stepped on the dusty track of the sports yard his mother fetched
us.her friend,a woman whose husband was a cop and had a 7 month baby
girl watched aside awhile.dinner i again almost ate less,for i
disliked greese food now,even disliked any remnant of other’s meal.the
old sisters chatted in low volumn on balcony while i watched tv for
some time.my baby haunted me sometimes.
its a nice day after all.my baby also in steady recovery.dog plot a
lot but they trying hold water with grid basket of bamboo.if tea is
sweat,if dog not to search for foul,the thing maybe can change.but
that’s impossible.impossible is the dog not to bite,the thief not to
steal.for several days i can’t access http://www.google.com,this time i
surfed in the cafe i first time visited,and i open http://www.google.com,but
just after searching result of blogwrite.exe’s download returned,and
when i search for the lyric of beiguozhichun,a japanese song,with
which i tried many times all blocked just to let me upset,it again cut
off online with www.google.com.dog even block search.yahoo.com from my
access,just to let me upset.what they can do beside this,they doomed
to death and before that they can let anyone smell its rotten smell in
the underwater.
bye.i love u.like pourest snow.kiss u with bright and shrine.

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{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 7

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

a straight sunny day.

after posted here in the morning i went to renew my borrowed pc
magzines.i boroowed a copy of pc magzine and 2 econoic management
magzines.then i went to see my baby.on the way near the kfc store i
bought him 2 fried chiken legs,for i want to present him a
surprise.they costed me 15 yuan.my baby in the arms of the kid sister
who is watching cop soup.my baby started to eat the chicken
happily.but he didn’t eat much,for he and me all suffered thirsty
after shitting waterily.today i shitted 6 or 7 times waterily.i ate
less but felt thirsty constantly.my baby’s mother refuted my suggetion
to shot outside,blaming the snow was cleaned.she suggested shot indoor
but i didn’t act upon and just played with our baby together in
bedroom while the kid sister (her aunt)cleaning dishes in waiting
room.i felt the kid sister at a loss in her attempt to build a closer
intimacy with my baby than mine,so i suggested my leaving and my wife
admitted.my baby asked me to hold him to the corridor but his mother
urgent to leave so she let him played with the doorring and let me
leave.
after returned to the dorm i read awhile magzine then dozed on
bed.till 4 pm i woke up in the dark.i farted a lot in the mid.being
sick now distracted me from ill wills around which had troubled me so
much so far.i know god putting us into a new training course now and i
look forward to it.
the snow was the thickest among the 3 snows in this winter,even
so,workers let it clueless on the road and obvious open space.so i
admire now the heavily snow recently haunted the western america,via
tv reports i seeing its beauty and mighty.
bye.i love u.in this cool early winter.kiss u with snow white.

a straight sunny day.

after posted here in the morning i went to renew my borrowed pc
magzines.i boroowed a copy of pc magzine and 2 econoic management
magzines.then i went to see my baby.on the way near the kfc store i
bought him 2 fried chiken legs,for i want to present him a
surprise.they costed me 15 yuan.my baby in the arms of the kid sister
who is watching cop soup.my baby started to eat the chicken
happily.but he didn’t eat much,for he and me all suffered thirsty
after shitting waterily.today i shitted 6 or 7 times waterily.i ate
less but felt thirsty constantly.my baby’s mother refuted my suggetion
to shot outside,blaming the snow was cleaned.she suggested shot indoor
but i didn’t act upon and just played with our baby together in
bedroom while the kid sister (her aunt)cleaning dishes in waiting
room.i felt the kid sister at a loss in her attempt to build a closer
intimacy with my baby than mine,so i suggested my leaving and my wife
admitted.my baby asked me to hold him to the corridor but his mother
urgent to leave so she let him played with the doorring and let me
leave.
after returned to the dorm i read awhile magzine then dozed on
bed.till 4 pm i woke up in the dark.i farted a lot in the mid.being
sick now distracted me from ill wills around which had troubled me so
much so far.i know god putting us into a new training course now and i
look forward to it.
the snow was the thickest among the 3 snows in this winter,even
so,workers let it clueless on the road and obvious open space.so i
admire now the heavily snow recently haunted the western america,via
tv reports i seeing its beauty and mighty.
bye.i love u.in this cool early winter.kiss u with snow white.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

white morning after snow

its just to auspicious,so propitious.after uncovered the curtain i was totally in a bewildering joy.god presents his favor to my asked.i woke up early and turned on radio on 7:13 am.i got up at 7:29 am.last night i waited in wondering after 0:07 am.i first time in near 3 months to have a fresh breakfast in the canteen.then i shitted,partly waterily.then i stamped all my food steps on the snow on the volleyball yard till full covered it.i will likely go to see my baby at noon.last night when i parted with my baby i felt sorry and said to him i couldn’t see him tomorrow and he asked him to held him into the corridor and played ball with lots of laughs in his mother’s arms.now god accomplished me by letting me surprised by another chance to be with my baby.in fact,hard time in animosity let us more banded.i love him so much.no matter how his mother’s relatives envious on it,nothing can distract my love and holiness onto him.
last night i spent 2.5 yuan here.a dog near me likely a cop,hacked me heavily before i ready to finish my work.it again let the ie responded very slowly and let some bottom of pages ill working and links redirected.i just doubting how they can delayed my pages requests so long and delayed the arriving pages tentatively.i guess that’s all what they can do now,to mess up,to shit around.
bye.i love u.kiss u with this holy bright white.love u in chill.

withering sunshine

last night i read in the dorm till 0:13 am.dog around bited furiously.i lost sleep all the night.i had pills and urined as usual,but just after i settled on bed i had need to urine.i guessed that’s not real and i thought i’d better endured it for my baby.so i sleeplessly.in late night the neighbor hooligans still made cracks with their chair or something,likely stayed there sleeplessly.in the process i saw the plot of dog to weave a web to trap me into the asylum and there they took full control of my life,from eating to sleeping to medicine to communication,in which they can plot and execute evil onto me without obvious obstacles.their aim was to whitewashed my mind and my name from the world.but they just unable to do as they liked.i got up at 7:13 am and went to see my baby at once.my baby vomitted in the mid night and let his mother restlessly these days.when i arrived he was held by the kid sister feeding while watching tv.my baby was motionless to me.so i went to the room wondering if i can do some works first on pc.but my baby asked for my caress and let the kid sister at a loss.the full day my baby didn’t leave my caress.he just loathed to walk or play with his own.he shitted 4 times with watery shits.he suffering.his mother let us not to receive her at noon.so we stayed at home in the morning.at noon the kid sister of his mother arrived.i disliked her for her behavior since i engaged with her elder sister.she seldom ate at home while her financial position was shabby.i mean,she likely frequently accompany some rich men to eat outside,at least those can afford her a treat.her last visit,dated the day before yesterday,brought some grapes with which i tasted some and likely so did my baby.and i shitted waterily last night,too.in my view she just too wicked,like her mother’s family.the afternoon she slept in the quilt in the room for my baby and now occupied by the kid sister of my baby’s mother’s mother,watching movies on her elder sister’s notebook.later the kid sister of her mother also slept on the same bed.i had to admit she was not nobody,she let me felt in the hell for unconfortable and sleepy.my baby played with tapwater and cooking utensil and grid frame of window and torch,but he also finally felt boring and slept.i slept aside my baby.my baby woked up 2 times with cries.after finally got up i still felt faint and lack of energy.my baby also loathed to play on his own.after 5 pm the kid sister left.after another an hour i held my baby to receive his mother,against her warn.my baby directed me visited a grocer shop along the road where we haunted a lot in summer but seldom recently.we chatted with the boss couples.my baby asked me to buy him a little bag of dry beef and we entered the school for a lot of persons likely students’ parents entered by their bikes.a cop card ported outside the door,it my second time seeing it ported there.my baby got energetic and talkative in his mother’s arms.it really let me happier.

dog likely weaving its web to trap me into prison or asylum,same place to let me disappear.i had not worry or hindersight.my sleep can be ruined without routine pill which now in my open drawer in the dorm free to replace,but i had long time waited for god not to let me live with it and its in fact the cause of my second falling into asylum for not taking pills for i think its unnature.maybe i lived with less time to sleep,like Nash,the famous physisist survived mental disease without taking pills.

tonight,no matter how distorted by the unnamed unease,or just can’t sleep,i live in god’s sight and ready for god’s call.that’s absoluteness.

bye.i love u.kiss u with bear.i hope i deserve a snow tonight.kiss u with baring.

a old shot uploaded.

withering sunshine

last night i read in the dorm till 0:13 am.dog around bited
furiously.i lost sleep all the night.i had pills and urined as
usual,but just after i settled on bed i had need to urine.i guessed
that’s not real and i thought i’d better endured it for my baby.so i
sleeplessly.in late night the neighbor hooligans still made cracks
with their chair or something,likely stayed there sleeplessly.in the
process i saw the plot of dog to weave a web to trap me into the
asylum and there they took full control of my life,from eating to
sleeping to medicine to communication,in which they can plot and
execute evil onto me without obvious obstacles.their aim was to
whitewashed my mind and my name from the world.but they just unable to
do as they liked.i got up at 7:13 am and went to see my baby at
once.my baby vomitted in the mid night and let his mother restlessly
these days.when i arrived he was held by the kid sister feeding while
watching tv.my baby was motionless to me.so i went to the room
wondering if i can do some works first on pc.but my baby asked for my
caress and let the kid sister at a loss.the full day my baby didn’t
leave my caress.he just loathed to walk or play with his own.he
shitted 4 times with watery shits.he suffering.his mother let us not
to receive her at noon.so we stayed at home in the morning.at noon the
kid sister of his mother arrived.i disliked her for her behavior since
i engaged with her elder sister.she seldom ate at home while her
financial position was shabby.i mean,she likely frequently accompany
some rich men to eat outside,at least those can afford her a treat.her
last visit,dated the day before yesterday,brought some grapes with
which i tasted some and likely so did my baby.and i shitted waterily
last night,too.in my view she just too wicked,like her mother’s
family.the afternoon she slept in the quilt in the room for my baby
and now occupied by the kid sister of my baby’s mother’s
mother,watching movies on her elder sister’s notebook.later the kid
sister of her mother also slept on the same bed.i had to admit she was
not nobody,she let me felt in the hell for unconfortable and sleepy.my
baby played with tapwater and cooking utensil and grid frame of window
and torch,but he also finally felt boring and slept.i slept aside my
baby.my baby woked up 2 times with cries.after finally got up i still
felt faint and lack of energy.my baby also loathed to play on his
own.after 5 pm the kid sister left.after another an hour i held my
baby to receive his mother,against her warn.my baby directed me
visited a grocer shop along the road where we haunted a lot in summer
but seldom recently.we chatted with the boss couples.my baby asked me
to buy him a little bag of dry beef and we entered the school for a
lot of persons likely students’ parents entered by their bikes.a cop
card ported outside the door,it my second time seeing it ported
there.my baby got energetic and talkative in his mother’s arms.it
really let me happier.
dog likely weaving its web to trap me into prison or asylum,same place
to let me disappear.i had not worry or hindersight.my sleep can be
ruined without routine pill which now in my open drawer in the dorm
free to replace,but i had long time waited for god not to let me live
with it and its in fact the cause of my second falling into asylum for
not taking pills for i think its unnature.maybe i lived with less time
to sleep,like Nash,the famous physisist survived mental disease
without taking pills.
tonight,no matter how distorted by the unnamed unease,or just can’t
sleep,i live in god’s sight and ready for god’s call.that’s
absoluteness.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bear.i hope i deserve a snow tonight.kiss u
with baring.
a old shot uploaded

withering sunshine

last night i read in the dorm till 0:13 am.dog around bited
furiously.i lost sleep all the night.i had pills and urined as
usual,but just after i settled on bed i had need to urine.i guessed
that’s not real and i thought i’d better endured it for my baby.so i
sleeplessly.in late night the neighbor hooligans still made cracks
with their chair or something,likely stayed there sleeplessly.in the
process i saw the plot of dog to weave a web to trap me into the
asylum and there they took full control of my life,from eating to
sleeping to medicine to communication,in which they can plot and
execute evil onto me without obvious obstacles.their aim was to
whitewashed my mind and my name from the world.but they just unable to
do as they liked.i got up at 7:13 am and went to see my baby at
once.my baby vomitted in the mid night and let his mother restlessly
these days.when i arrived he was held by the kid sister feeding while
watching tv.my baby was motionless to me.so i went to the room
wondering if i can do some works first on pc.but my baby asked for my
caress and let the kid sister at a loss.the full day my baby didn’t
leave my caress.he just loathed to walk or play with his own.he
shitted 4 times with watery shits.he suffering.his mother let us not
to receive her at noon.so we stayed at home in the morning.at noon the
kid sister of his mother arrived.i disliked her for her behavior since
i engaged with her elder sister.she seldom ate at home while her
financial position was shabby.i mean,she likely frequently accompany
some rich men to eat outside,at least those can afford her a treat.her
last visit,dated the day before yesterday,brought some grapes with
which i tasted some and likely so did my baby.and i shitted waterily
last night,too.in my view she just too wicked,like her mother’s
family.the afternoon she slept in the quilt in the room for my baby
and now occupied by the kid sister of my baby’s mother’s
mother,watching movies on her elder sister’s notebook.later the kid
sister of her mother also slept on the same bed.i had to admit she was
not nobody,she let me felt in the hell for unconfortable and sleepy.my
baby played with tapwater and cooking utensil and grid frame of window
and torch,but he also finally felt boring and slept.i slept aside my
baby.my baby woked up 2 times with cries.after finally got up i still
felt faint and lack of energy.my baby also loathed to play on his
own.after 5 pm the kid sister left.after another an hour i held my
baby to receive his mother,against her warn.my baby directed me
visited a grocer shop along the road where we haunted a lot in summer
but seldom recently.we chatted with the boss couples.my baby asked me
to buy him a little bag of dry beef and we entered the school for a
lot of persons likely students’ parents entered by their bikes.a cop
card ported outside the door,it my second time seeing it ported
there.my baby got energetic and talkative in his mother’s arms.it
really let me happier.
dog likely weaving its web to trap me into prison or asylum,same place
to let me disappear.i had not worry or hindersight.my sleep can be
ruined without routine pill which now in my open drawer in the dorm
free to replace,but i had long time waited for god not to let me live
with it and its in fact the cause of my second falling into asylum for
not taking pills for i think its unnature.maybe i lived with less time
to sleep,like Nash,the famous physisist survived mental disease
without taking pills.
tonight,no matter how distorted by the unnamed unease,or just can’t
sleep,i live in god’s sight and ready for god’s call.that’s
absoluteness.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bear.i hope i deserve a snow tonight.kiss u
with baring.

a old shot uploaded.
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value=”http://www.youtube.com/v/q1I7YqwPJX0“></param><embed
src=”http://www.youtube.com/v/q1I7YqwPJX0
type=”application/x-shockwave-flash” width=”600″
height=”350″></embed></object>

Monday, December 11, 2006

sunny afternoon

in the afternoon i spent 3 yuan and 3 hours to modify my googlepage at http://benzillar.goolgepages.com to let it show my blog update with date but failed.dog’s hack and maybe busy internet traffic (less likely) let the surfing a torment.and dog biting nearby.i felt more or less upset when i left.i didn’t expected so costly.then i went to renew my borrowed pc magzines.new issues arrived and i tried to borrow 2 copies.i read newspaper in the newpaper room of qrrs.people of taiwan surely didn’t echo mainland’s media’s distorted reports,and they chose to support localized party.no one favors the outdated dictator system of mainland of prc.when i returned to the dorm its near dark.i read a pc mag till dinner time passed.dog bited heavily in the dorm.in the canteen i was offered meat and full filled.here i registered my family members to http://clipmarks.com to enjoy its bookmarks and clips sharing service.my account at http://clipmarks.com/clipper/benzillar .i need more time to full explore it.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bear.

home movie of my baby in his first winter.

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Sunday, December 10, 2006

bright sun,clear cloud in pale blue sky

last night i read my blog on my pda till 1:03 am.dog bited heavily
before i went to bed.in the morning i dreamed riding a double seat
bike with my wife and watching a teacher painting on blackboard to
pormote a lecture will be offered by a chinese study ‘master’.i woke
up at 9:50 am and got up at 10:39 am.dog started to bite before i woke
up and it forced me to rest in silence after i got up and sat on bed
motionlessly.in the canteen there r quite some girls i don’t know
where they r from.a cop in uniform picked to sit aside me and drank a
bottle of soft drink and left.
in the cafe farer than starsea cafe,i powered 3 pcs but all hardware
failed after i login the cafe’s register interface.dog recently likely
bargained with me.i can’t access https of gmail but http of gmail
workable and i can compose email in it even err-proned.www.google.com
can’t access directly from input in url,but accessible from ur login
gmail service.my personal homepage of google was blocked for 2
days.logout of google’s quite some service lost response,likely cut
off by dog or stealing cookies from login pc.torpark on my writeproof
udisk also set to fail,and proxies i tried some were set to fail.dog
still felt they r charging all and allowed to work around within their
broken dog machine.
bye.its not a bad day even sunshine sometimes white washed by unclear
cloud around the sun.i hope i can hear u around the new year.i love
u.kiss u with bright.

sunny day

last night i read till 1:13 am.dog in the cafe farer than starsea let me dogtired after returned to the dorm.i even felt dozy after read awhile ‘thinking on the web’ but gradually i became agile and stayed lately.in the dawn i dreamed i walked in my hometown and passed by a woman carrying shits as futilizer and was stained by shits and felt anger.then i went to a countryfolk’s home whose husband was a cardre of ccp to ask for the skate the wife promised to my baby free of charge.but the wife sneered at us and i got blank hands.on the way to see my baby,i felt gloomy.after i arrived my baby in the arms of the kid sister of his mother’s mother.she avoided me when my baby asked for my caress.the grandmom busy in the lavatory.soon i started restored old picture of my baby from our backup cds and moved to my udisk intending to shift to google web albums.my baby asked for my cares.i let him drink milk against the kid sister’s warn that he suffer watery shit.the liu left in the dawn for his hometown to find himself wife,i heard this later by the kid son of the sister.my felt sleepy but can’t fall into sleep so he coutched on my head and was induced to vomit.he vomitted several times.the grandmom fetched a towl to map the floor and let me aside while my head full of dirty.
after my baby’s mother returned i started again to the unfinished work to move my baby’s shot onto udisk.we couples later to have lunch.on the table i introduced my work last night lately to add all my family members’ google web album into each favorite.i also designed a logo for my google group in memory of my hometown at hubei prov.,centual china,at noon there at http://groups-beta.google.com/group/zhudajiu .the logo at http://zhudajiu.googlegroups.com/web/zhudajiulogoani.gif .welcome ur comments.i also changed her google groups’ icons.she admitted my works.the sister listened aside.the kid son of the kid sister also there.after i finished my shower in the public bathroom i cared my baby to play while the sisters left to shower.soon the kid sister of my baby’s mother arrived.my baby now open to show his kindness to newcomers and he leaned onto the kid sister and the kid son for sometimes,let all of us glad.his mother went out to buy some dishes and we,all young persons,ate our dinner.the atmosphere gradually turned unfavorable and the kid sister of my baby’s mother locked herself sleeping on our bedroom.the kid son and a little boy of my baby’s mother’s colleague’s son,just arrived there to be tutored,both slept on the floor while i sang loudly with my baby on my shoulders.my baby later turned boring.i know energies got conflict.so i soon left.my baby waved to me.the sisters of my baby’s mother yet didn’t returned from bathroom.
that’s our happy day today.i still felt laughable on the way home,reviewing 3 laid themselves down around us.my spirit was considerablely promoted comparing that when i left the dorm.
bye.i love u.like morning star and sunset.kiss u with quice.

baby in his first winter

warren in-fant

btw,last post there is a line ‘for the reception girl at starsea dispised me by the excuse of no charges,i haunted a farer cafe and was told its fee lowered to 1 yuan
an hour again.’here ‘charges’ should be ‘changes’.

my baby son in his infantile

when he was in his 6 month on the earth

Saturday, December 09, 2006

sunny afternoon

after posted in starsea cafe i meandered in the sunshine for about
half of an hour.the air is warm.after returned to the dorm i read
awhile ‘thinking on the web’ then dozed.the family of my baby’s
mother’s mother,likely had a prone of strong feminism,exposed its
intention in my mind.dog let me felt cold and my radio finally turned
it off automatively.after getting up i went to make water and the room
facing the lavatory leaks out blow of laughs,including girls’.i knew
some of them felt lonely and boring even in crowd and gathering.i
review my solitude in which i missed u solely,i tasted joy and pure
and saint and plenty.love in its simplest form is just losing urself
in ur admire to ur beloved.i love u and pray for u,for our bright
future.the radio was elaborating on fable when i secondly turned it
on,and then on narcism,but nothing can distract my faith in god,in my
parents,in my son.i took u as my partner,with sometimes mindless
ignorance or leting ur being,i took u as my own,with pride and
criticism,with boring and with immersed,just as the bible claimed,u r
from my body and shaped by the creator to accomplish me.i don’t bother
to attend u every minute,but we r always one together anytime any
place.in every smile between us we r assurrenced; in every word
outspoken we echo soul’s harmony from heaven.god let his road spiteful
and as a compensation he let u accompany me,like fountain in
desert,and like lamb in bushes.
for the reception girl at starsea dispised me by the excuse of no
charges,i haunted a farer cafe and was told its fee lowered to 1 yuan
an hour again.last time the cafes increased their charges absurd in
compliance with cop’s demand.what’s business with cop with cafe’s
service in market place?but in china they do charged every
things,every price.that’s china’s promise in wto.
bye.i love u.i first time since cafe’s increased charge surfed more
than an hour tonight.i hope i can enjoy web more freely.kiss u with
bright and blight.

Friday, December 08, 2006

sunny morning,turns even thick at noon

i woke up at 9:50 am and got up at 11:20 am.last night i read
‘thinking on the web’ till its 1:39 am.dog got repentting after
fighted a war near around 0 am when i usually went to sleep at that
time,to urge me rest.some of them were hard core gays,some of them
wanted to finish their task to monitor me,some of them were tomb
sleeper and demanded seeing all living slept when they can dance with
evil in the dark after.i slept sound but being attacted after woke
up.i stayed in bed wondering,my baby 1 or 2 times cried in my ears but
that’s his way to defend.the liu,in his early 30s’ or late 20s’ ,slept
with his mother on the same bed in different quilts.he born with
falling sickness but that can’t be his mother’s cause to sleep with
her mature son.they constantly challenge us,likes the lius in nowaday
china challenge people of china,and that’s their due to walk out their
track of failure to testfy god’s choice.god’s glory manifests itself
through the rebellion of sins,through the doomed of those refuse
conversion,the doomed of those refuse the truth.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bright.

sunny day

last night i read ‘thinking on the web’ till 0:17 am.dog’s biting
lately but under holy spirit i forgave and smoothly fell into sleep.i
got up 10:29 am and went to see my baby at once.when i arrived my baby
was sobbing and i was told he pointed to the clock when i due to
appear to the kid sister of his mother’s mother and when the sister
said to him his dad he started to cry and demand open the door.how i
was touched.soon we went to receive his mother.i bought him an
icecream and a bag of soft candy.at noon he was settled to sleep by
his mother and i stayed wandering in the bedroom where he slept.after
he woke up i held him playing tapwater and teeth stick.the sister and
her son slept in the room for my son lately after 3 pm .when my baby
cried for i not to let him play with the grid frame of window,with
which he played for some time and attempting to lock it on his own the
mother got up and see.we had some unease time to concentrate to play
while they locked the room sleeping or pretend to sleep.the liu then
ate his lunch lately and his mother let him feed my baby with some
rice and my baby received it.then they watched tv and later the mother
started to cook.we waited and waited for the time to went out.his
mother due to have her night class and will leave her school after
6:30 pm.when its time to leave the mother insisted feeding my baby
with rice and pumpkin and i sensed her feeling of lose to seeing i
cared my baby well and enough and testing me if i can afford her
leaving.my baby let me wait to eat her feeding,but she threat my baby
to eat frequently and my baby finally didn’t eat the last mouth she
and me suggested.the school open its door and we entered.his mother
left lately till we arrived half way to the teaching building.my baby
insisted walking on the dusty track of the sport yard.after dinner his
mother watched tv even my baby wanted to play.he finally sent to sleep
by his mother and i left.
its a nice day again for me and my baby.hope u enjoy ur everyday.
bye.i love u.kiss u with cool.

btw,last post there is a line reads ‘since yesterday the idea
haunted me its time to testify if god chooses from his creators or
infinite turns around,suffers to exalt and wellbeings to
fell.technologically operating on some human species not a problem,but
the ethic of human kinship troubled god’s chosen so much so far.’here
‘creators’ should be ‘creatures’.then dog attacted me aside and let me
didn’t check online dictioanry.the online dictioanry was responded
slowly by dog’s hacking.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

sunny afternoon.

after lunch i rest on bed.bitings around let me dozing.after woke up i
meandered awhile in the tree yard for about a quarter,after the shadow
of the tree casted on the rim of the flower garden.then i went to
renew my pc magzines.after fetched 2 copies i read newspaper in the
newspaper room of qrrs.when i sat there i was alone in the sunshine
facing the window.soon dogs arrived and one of them,a middle aged,kept
facing me and challenged me.i read ‘world reference
digest'(cankaoxiaoxi) and read quite reports on illegal children labor
and migrates in abnormally dengerous labor situations risked and
resulted into body hurts.and america suffering too much responsibility
to correct the world in distort.bushes suffering shortsighted demand
of profits from us’ operation on world.since yesterday the idea
haunted me its time to testify if god chooses from his creators or
infinite turns around,suffers to exalt and wellbeings to fell.mankind
sees quite some fates of animals and now its turn to see that of quite
some tribe of human.technologically operating on some human species
not a problem,but the ethic of human kinship troubled god’s chosen so
much so far.nearer and nearer people will be confronted with the way
of god’s,the way to choose and extinguished the bitchery,the evil.
www.google.com was blocked for 3 days.gfan of goolgegroup was banned
for access.that’s china,a place rebut thinking while the web of the
world innovating everyday.the place being shitted all around,the place
gays and tomb sleeper rampant and attact in daytime.
bye.i love u , like steering star in deepest black sky. kiss u with
tear and bear,pity and cleanse.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

brightest sunshine in early winter

so i got god’s promission in double: the snow and the sun.the snow was
neatily cleaned by workers and letting me doubting if they r remnant
of previous snow,but the pour white scattered everywhere proved it
faultlessly.the sun was tiny round and demands more time before u can
see clear its burning round.i got up at 10:10 am and being bited at
once.last night i read the ebook ‘thinking on the web’ from
www.33367.com after 0:15 am.demons in neighbor rooms and in the tv
room near my room stayed there. in the dawn i dreamed i was told to
care my baby or the baby of my third elder sister.but i was told my
alumni gathering held in a place.i busy with something,like practising
handwriting or other,and when i held the baby left to attend the
gathering its raining.then i found the gathering just in the room on
the higher floor of the same building of our home and i returned the
left the baby at home and left.but i likely didn’t find the gathering
but found my wife or my third elder sister at home complaining i
ditched the baby and let him cried into chill and soundless.my heart
was broken by sorrow and i kneeled down aside the cradle to kiss
him.but he was well after all.i was startled almost as his
encountering with silence and without cares.no matter how i sometimes
absent from my beloved,god assures us with the brilliant sun on
time.that’s our being blessed.our pledge in one.
bye.i love u.like sunshine and snow white.kiss u with tear.

thin sunshine morning, gloomy afternoon

last night i got about 200mb ebooks from http://www.33367.com,let me really
in wilder.even downloading speedy my google service and blogs pages
responded slowly.in the dorm after returned i read awhile my blog on
my pda then worry about my baby and i buzzed my baby’s mother,she
refuted my suggestion to visit my baby in the night.then i read the 3
pc magzines to 0:47 am.neighbor hooligans got irritated and bited
heavily.they likely totally got mad and evil.after going to bed,my
beloved blond within myspace.com,jamie,haunted my mind for about an
hour.however,i slept sound.i got up at 9:24 am then i went to see my
baby.when i arrived there my baby just stood behind the liu who is
busy with his parcel against the wall of waiting room and curious.then
he played tapwater in most time of the morning.challenge from the liu
and his mother let me sang and recited a lot.i held my baby went out
to receive his mother at 11 am.my baby loathe to leave and the liu’s
mother also tended to retard us.the bike repairer ,who is small man
liked a crone always burning ditched tyre to warm his chamber aside
the road,let the air smelly and poluting.my baby soon slept on my
shoulders,which let quite some persons alarmed me,in good or ill
will.his mother left the school early among her colleagues and fetch
us.after lunch my baby was milked by his mother and slept.so did his
mother.i felt dozed but cold without any quilt.then his mother left
for her school and gave me 2 quilts of my baby.each time i felt dozed
but agiled again by challenge around.my baby slept for about an
hour,and woke up when i just thought about wangbin,my alumni i refered
last time in my blog,a guy also from northeast of china.then we
started to play.we ate pine nuts.my baby played with tapwater and let
the basin full.later a ball candy let him pacified for some time when
i just worried about boring will letting him irritated.the mother
started to cook toast pie and fed my baby with some.its time to went
out but my baby refused to leave.i beated him on his bottom 2 flaps
and he cried.when we arrived on the ground we found 3 girls after
their class and attending another class in the building conjoined with
our building and used as the office of street branch of the municipal
gov. .we played with the little girls awhile.then his mother returned
and found us.i then busy with back ebooks downloaded last night to my
pda and his mother busy with milking him.the liu urged to dinner
loudly.he cooked the dishes and cleaned the table and bowls.that let
us obliged.the mother and the son then watched tv silently and let us
couple distressed for our adopting their labor.the rule of religion
let me stadleless and let me lingered more time to wait my decisive
spirit.when i left my baby asked to go to the corridor to watch and he
watched my leaving.the moon was dim in the dark blue sky.i think it
would be blessing if tonight snows.
bye.i love u.kiss u with fright of the balance among the created.i
love like the serenading moon.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

sunny all day

after posted i roamed in the tree yard of the dorm zone for some
time.then i went to qrrs’ libray to borrow some mags.then went to read
newspaper with the 3 pc magzines i borrowed.there i also read some
mags.after returned to dorm i read a mag titled ‘computer application
digest'(dianniao yingyong wenzai) till dinnr time.i was offered some
meats and i ate with pleasure and full fiilled.in the cafe i
downloaded some ebooks from a website at http://www.33367.com .i liked
it very much.its contents were from 0day,but i was blocked from access
to 0day staff for quite some time.o,that’s really a pastime long time
ago.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bright.and with coming snow i love u in deep freeze.

Monday, December 04, 2006

bright sun,cloudless sky

i woke up at 8:21 am and got up at 11:23 am.last night spying eyes
trapped me for quite some time and continued even before i woke up.the
radio elaborating oil paintings collecting when i just turned it
on.that’s my pastime when i was young.i love fine art and ready a day
i can pick it up again with u,with our children on we had time to
breathe freely.i some time ago had quite some collective works gallery
of famous impressionists and post impressionists,but i ditched them
when i broke my heart with the girl fang(square) when i prepared my
master degree entrance exam there in nankai.unv.,yes,i also collected
them at tianjin when i studied therre as a collegian.the morning i
fighted with spying with new and maybe higher level of skill,the spies
likely now stronger and trained.their broken web tried to trap me onto
it and smoother me.breath among men always poluted and i sometimes had
to breathe other ways.birds of the air sure nearer to god,but i had to
learn to launch now on the rock and earth.
today is a nice day,with the large and brilliant sun and clear sky.i
needn’t any more warrent.the air is warm,likely brought chiller snow
days coming later.i however enjoy its warmth,now that i can partly
enjoy ur body temperature now.i look forward to u,to the wave and wind
of ur hairs,the wind and blow of ur sweat breath from ur warm armpit.i
love u,like round golden moon in these night sky.i love u like the
round cheek of the most lovable baby in the world.i love to kiss
u,kiss u red watery lips,ur kitty nosetip,i love u and kiss u now.kiss
u with sunflower brilliances ur brilliant cheek and beam.
bye.i love u.kiss u.

gloomy morning,almost sunny afternoon

last night after posted and roamed in the room i suddently decided to see my baby.i arrived there about 7:30 and left there after 9:08 pm.we couple played with our baby and let him laugh a lot.the liu locked himself in the room for our baby for some time later went to waiting room to watch tv.the sisters watched there silently all time.the eldest always chose cop soup and the night they watch it.i read my blog lately to 0:43 am in the dorm.i got up at 9:42 am this morning and went to see my baby.when i arrived my baby just watching the liu and his mother and the old woman curiously and after i told him he started to play with me.he played tapwater,salt and cooking utensil.we went outside to receive his mother after 11 am.her mother watched us meeting her outside the door but i mindedly didn’t speed up my step with my baby sleeping on my shoulders and she really got angered and left us behind while she returned home directly.then my baby woke up when we encountered a crowd near the elemental school aside the middle school.i bought him a toast tomato and he ate some.lunch was consisted of 2 dishs,one is fried fishes.i ate 2 bowl of rice and 2 fishes.at noon the sisters slept on the bed for our baby and my baby and his mother later slept on our bedroom.i sat on the floor enjoyed the model of a house,which is an attachment of a raiway toy of my baby.the liu watched tv aside me in the waiting room.we competed each concentration.after his mother left, my baby again played tapwater for quite some time while the sister chatted in his room.the liu later haunted outside awhile.i sang and recited chinese traditional poems till my baby boring into sleep on my shoulders.he slept about 40 minutes.at this time i peacefully thought the way of god and religion,and more parts likely echoes buddism’s but i decided to let it be.then the grandmom arrived.i left my baby her awhile and started trying to shift my blog updates to my pda but soon my baby arrived and played with monitor and the pc.later i turned on speaker and let its tremble to its largest volumn.my baby was shocked for a bit and i held him in my arms to let him familiar with it.for my ears recently losing some part of its hearing,the volumn let the sisters close the door.then my baby’ s mother returned.dinner is dumplines which i always disliked.i held awhile after i first intended to leave after dinner.then they ate water melon which is small and its inner meat colors yellow.my baby ate quite some with his mother.i ate 2 or 3 slices later.then i left.the two sons of the kid sister stayed in waiting room when i ate while the sisters entered my baby’s room.i didn’t lay any comments and left.i kissed my baby heavily. that’s our happy day today.i love my baby and the life so much,even i know our future with u would be more splend. bye.i love u.kiss u with the round large golden moon.on the way to the dorm she let me being blessed so much. 2 heading works when i worked in the field of heading design.just a stamp and a memory of pastime,

my old heading work for my website.

my old heading work for my son’s mother’s class gathering.

btw,posted on Nov. 24 titled ‘weak sunny day’ there is a line ‘the swallowing freak and monster itself can’t live in itself peace.its consuming more and more living
spirits and living spices in peace.’ here ‘spices’ should be ‘species’.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

sunny afternoon

i roamed in the garden of the dorm zone for about half and an hour in
sunshine.doubting my family,my kingdom,my god.qrrser constantly left
from the door behind me.last night i read luke of gospel lately and
much refreshed after leaving it aside.after returned to dorm i
listened radio music on bed.dog’s biting.i dozed after the radio was
shut aftter 3 pm.even felt cold i still rested.and in it i knew my
baby’s mother’s family’s intension on me and my son.but nothing can
left any dent on our free will.the royal of my family irrelavant with
nobody but god and it exists for a thousand and a hundred and nine
years.that’s the rule.the rule from heaven.
my baby,this winter especially warm.but no warmth better than ur
warmth shadded in my heart and on my body.i look forward to ur red
lips and scarlet scarf near around the new year.my family warmly
welcome ur return,my long time thirst.
bye.i love u.kiss u with snow white.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

sunny morning

i woke up at 8:37 am and got up at 10 am.after posted 2 threads in
google group more than half of an hour passed and i now in a rush to
write my blog and that hamper my smooth thinking.i know i can stayed
here longer but i hesitated about my independence.
bye.i had to leave now for my time out.i love u.kiss u with bright.

sunny almost all day.

i got up at 10:02 am.last night i read bible lately.i read luk.before
the night i had finsihed read john.demons left me for quite sometimes
when i read.last night near the door of my baby’s mother’s school,men
haunted us likely demons,they let my buttock painful but the pain
disappeared after i read.i went to see my baby after i got up.i
fetched the remain bag of rice.when i arrived,a young man sat in the
room left me doubting if he’s my kid brother.then i found the kid
sister of my baby’s mother’s mother.they just arrived before me.the
young man was her first son in her first marriage,whose family name is
liu.i held my baby playing on the balcony soon.then his mother
returned.lunch was fried beef.then i went to shower.my baby’s mother
left to hand in a form as her homework.in the afternoon the liu
babbled a lot with the eldest sister while his mother seldom
talked.later the atmospher was thick dirty and i left to surf in the
aim to modify my blog in memory of my grand father at
http://faezrland.blogspot.com but dog hamper me to open it while i can
open my baby’s mother’s web album.
its not bad a day for me and my baby.the old woman praised a lot on my
baby,in good and in ill.i left them quietly after kiss my baby in his
mother’s arms.the newcomers in an close room leting the young son to
test his new coat his mother brought him.
bye.i love u.kiss u with snow white.

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{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 6

Friday, December 01, 2006

gloomy morning,sunny afternoon.

last afternoon i spent 5 hours to backup my blogs after httarck was
suggested by google blog group and in the process i knew i was hacked
to be slow to download but at least i think its working so i just
waited.then after 5:15 pm i ready to leave for dinner and i started to
stop httrack and logout of my google then the pc of the cafe hanged
and beeped,mimicing hardware failure,letting all my waiting in
ruin.dog really now lost their basic politeness and policy and
police.after returned to dorm i felt bitter with pity,and in my baby’s
mother’s call i commented dog fell into hooligan.i read awhile in the
dorm after dinner then i decided to see my baby after the need haunted
me for some time and challenged me.i arrived there after 8 pm,i
guess.my baby just being held by his mother playing on ground near the
cooking area.he asked for my caress at once.and i held him playing
tapwater as he asked.the old woman sat in front of the tv
watching,seemingly the owner of the house.his mother later felt boring
and went to bed,after i suggested her to play with her notebook but
she refuted.i backup my downloads to the old pc then powered it
down.my baby spared no effects to beat the keyboard and switch the
power button of the monitor.when we againt playing with tapwater her
mother lost her temper and held our baby back and demanded my leave.i
knew the old woman challenged us in silence.when i started to clean
myself while my baby was milked by his mother,he again catched me and
asked to play with tapwater.later he was calmed by his mother and fell
into sleep and i also slept.in dawn i dreamed of my second elder
brother and second elder sister,and my nephew taking drags in the
dream.my eldest sister commited suicide by throwing herself into
changjiang river in a summer night when i was at grade 2 in middle
school.that’s the deepest dent in my heart for i love her so much.so
her son and daughter lived in our home for quite some years till their
father later fetched them home.my baby was put on by his mother early
for me,and we ate breakfast bought by the old woman.my baby asked for
my caress as soon as he getting up with only a shirt.i love him so
much and got up immediately.all morning i held him playing tapwater or
toddled in the rooms.when we all felt boring and i started to sing he
slept on my shoulders and later in my arms.when its 11 am we went to
receive his mother.he asked me buying him a icecream.in the afternoon
we sometimes ate nuts sometimes playing tapwater.the group monitor of
my once working place buzzed in at about 2:30 pm to let me fetch rice
dispatched by qrrs,my once working place.i carried a bag to my baby’s
mother’s home with my bike and left a bag there for tomorrow to carry.
later the grandmom arrived and my baby was sleeping in my arms.the
sisters talked and forced me again think in the way of god and
religion.i then know there is no way to testimony me among men,but god
and his gospels.the grandmom left soon after caressed my baby some
time while i busy with backup my recent blog to my pda.when we went to
receive his mother,some men haunted around us.we ate a stick of sugar
gourd and enjoyed it.that’s our grand day.
today the 2 cafe near the dorm zone all increased its price for 1.5
yuan an hour.china likely steered into inflation now.but the stock
market still bubbling,recording high again and again and the office
media still hosting bubbling commentators to bubble it.and my baby’s
mother was lured to try fund agency service.shits.i warned her but in
vain,like all my disappointings to her.she just being narrow minded
and hopelessly stupidly stubborn.
bye.i love u.the moon now very round and large.i love u in her
serenity.kiss u with coming snow.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

pale sunny morning

i woke up at 8:04 am and got up at 10:21 am.last night was not so peaceful for me.but i slept sound as usual.in morning dog still biting and i had to urined once.i dreamed my college girlfriend whose family name is liu,and left me after 1 year when we r sophermore.i dreamed she showed me her shot of movie of my being mad in unversity.so i was told even when i was mad in my 20s’.after dream i found its wrong.i was sound in my 20s’.another alumni,wenxiong(civil male) appeared in my dream and tried to relate she and me.she gave me and wangbin(king’s army),a guy from northeast of china,her notes to show her fondness.after woke up and meandered in the room i doubting if i was forced to dream this by the neighbor hooligans,i always guessed one of them should under family name of liu.lius now phenotype in nowaday china,after their sibs of liushaoqi,the ccp’s adhesive and kkb’s(i mean secret security force) head and died after torture.they appeared among the obvious higher social ladder.
i likely had not more to utter.silence covers me with due peace when i was alone.u can enjoy ur peace so far,but only with me u can find final peace.i hope ur hair’s wave can touch me sooner and i will taste ur lips with ice cold.i love u.kiss u with bright.bye.

btw,post entitled ‘sunny morning,gloomy afternoon’ posted Nov 29 there is a line reads:’last night in a dream my worry of my blogs was hijacked by dog was replied,i dreamed in a school or someplace in very haste i tried to test if my blogs’ pages returned to me in internet cafes was from a faked website cocted by cops and redirected.’ in which ‘cocted’ should be ‘concocted’.’faked’ better replaced with ‘forged’.i mean cop hijacking domain of world into its cheating domain,just like many internet criminal categoried in title of ‘fishing’ in chinese.however criminal can only cheating user with familiar domain but in fact different domain while dog can hijacked ur page requests and returned u fake page.
another line within the post reads ‘its the last day of our monthly deposit and i was told i was left one day to deposit duely otherwise missing one compensating two month.’i quite sometimes think in chinglish,so here ‘compensating’ should be ‘penalized’.the bank ruled missing a month due deposit of fix term saving and withdraw wholesome,u had to deposit one more month to get the due profits.i guess.

propitious night

i returned to my baby’s mother’s home after posted in the cafe i first
time visited.my gmail was blocked to composite email two days even i
can see its interface.when click on compositing email it popups err
messages.that’s dog’s show.on the way a cop car passed by me and i
know its really that all the cafe was under dog’s surveilance.my baby
welcome my return and immediately asked for my caress.he played with
tapwater all the time before we went out to receive his mother.the old
woman aside urged us not to play with water for sometimes and using
her will to force me think the way of religion and god.my baby lately
also asked to play with cooking utility and i demonstrated him using
knife to slice cabbage.he refused to go out to receive his mother but
i in a haste put him up.on the way he let me haunted on the cross of
the road for some time,then he fell into sleep near the school.we
entered the school yard till saw his mother near the entrance of the
teaching building.at dinner i again full filled.i inquired the price
of apple and in doubt if i can take an apple with me.i left but
returned for forgeting fetching mags his mother needn’t any more,and
his mother offered an apple for me with the mags.
dog even hacked files on my udisk.i had a larger udisk from my baby’s
wife’s mp3 player,which had not a writeproof lock buttom and torpark
on it failed to open any google sites and livejournal.com.but with
torpack from my writeproof udisk i surfed swiftly.they hacked me
recently heavily just before i was ready to logout.they let me paid
more by forcing the web responded slowly to my logout.they succeeded
for 3 or 4 times when i surfed in the cafe charges according half of
an hour as a unit.last night i almost lost temper and complained it to
my baby’s mother when she buzzed in for daily bless,saying dog now
descends to hooligan behavior.she let me shut up and i did.with dog,u
can’t expect any humanity.
bye.i love u.kiss u with moonlight.

sunny morning,gloomy afternoon

i got up at 9:21 am.last night dog’s biting was weak.i read mrs Thatcher’s autobiography late after 11:30 pm.politician’s life was quite interesting and her road to serv her motherland was step by step led by god.god place responsibility on some prominances like an arrow on the bow.a single person’s life was really short.historic steam soaring with deafing sound.after geting up and had a bag of milk from my baby’s mother’s home,i headed to see my baby.last night in a dream my worry of my blogs was hijacked by dog was replied,i dreamed in a school or someplace in very haste i tried to test if my blogs’ pages returned to me in internet cafes was from a faked website cocted by cops and redirected.i can’t clearly remember the result but i know i had to trust god.including these chase and hunting and harass like most disgusting virus and gay,all god’s train onto me.god let israel suffered and let america humiliated,that just let common sense and common people more sound and selfsufficient.in the morning i help my baby playing with tapwater against the old woman’s sneers.after 11 am my baby slept in my arms.his mother let me not to receive her in the phone last night.after his mother shifted him to bed i copy my blog update to my pda.the lunch with big slice of pork let me full filled.i just felt god’s care and the power of my will.after lunch i secured her notebook with modification on registry and security settings.then our baby woke up.after ated some food we held him to have him vaccined.he cried likes we wrong did him and stopped cry just after his mother held him from my arms.then i held him to deposit for his graduate education.the branch of the bank,communication bank of china,was under refurnishment and we were told to another branch cross 2 streets.there 3 windows stopped service as a common phenomeno in china stateowned bank.and the rest window quened each with 2 or 3 persons but the handling process went very slowly.i waited about half of an hour to let 2 women finished.in our back under the window facing the street herds the aged,who can’t find place with warming utensil and can gather,as a common phenomeno in north china.my baby on my shoulders sometimes got irritated.when my turn arrived i was told the magnetism of the deposit book turned too weak and i had to fetch my id card and my baby’s id card or our residential book to rebuild our deposit book.i argued its their fault but without any effect.its the last day of our monthly deposit and i was told i was left one day to deposit duely otherwise missing one compensating two month.i hated my baby’s mother’s delaying,but i hated more the stagnant process of china stateowned banks.i just fed up with quene and slow process.on the way back to home i complained to my baby how chinese lived with all these dog shits.after returned i handed my baby to the old woman and fetch certification as demand and went there again.a dog in yellow coat just closely near me and biting.he was first on the farest window from the one i handled but he followed me and sat on the chair i should sit when i dealing.i intended to test my worry and found 4 or 5 internet cafes all stuffed.that only indicated how many idle young men awaiting jobs.
bye.i m timing.i love u as usual.kiss u with coming snow white.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

pale sunshine all day

after posting i jogged in the garden for some time.then i went to borrow pc magzines from qrrs’ libray.after some persuading i borrowed 2 copy of computer fans magzine.i then read newspaper in the newspaper room of qrrs.a cop haunted there and left.i see religion battle in world.and god let america not to afford full damage of the disaster of islamics.may or may not its time to see the fate of dictatorship,but the nation deserted the midasia now boasting to challenge the world in peace.russia like a half died dinosaur peering to rerivify itself,letting the old man steal new energy from the updating world.the librains behind the glass wall biting and later almost gave up.i finished reading a mag in the rest of afternoon in the dorm.at dinner they didn’t offer me any meat on my routine budget of 3 yuan a meal.i enjoyed it as usual for i really hunger after reading and being bited.after dinner i ate the apple from my baby’s mother.i waited awhile lest missing her phone.here i registered myself an http://www.linkedin.com an account to have an experience of its service as refered by the mags.some wiki sites were blocked from access now,as i known,but i likely will enjoy google’s soon from its acclaim of http://www.jot.com.i can’t wait for it.life can be easier via web,but the job market in reality so slumpy that let anyone in season daunted.and world also see its stalemate in the dogged world with unease of dirty spot of outdated dicatator systems.god let everyone in the world a sincere choice to follow,to follow a brighter future with democracy entended or cogged with sand in it like nowaday zipped world,spoted with fire and torment.
bye.i love u.kiss u with coming snow white.

Monday, November 27, 2006

pale morning sunshine.

i got up at 10:20 am.dog last night bited lately,including the couples
from hunan prov.,south of china,they trying to peek into my baby’s
situation.they have a baby son too.after woke up i stayed on bed
listening radio for awhile,on which elabrating ccp’s cardres attracted
a lot of fishing service to let them comsume at cost of public budget
in the title of fishing.after getting up i jogged in the room and
found my murmur in silence in my heart.i was restored to silence when
i m alone.endure and hope like the firefly in summer night,waving and
blinking.i challenge nobody,except ur decision to keep mute to my
craving for u.my prosperous offspring and kingdom r right in the
reality in the future timespace as actual being now.what i enduring
and looking forward to is the pleasure u will bring to me,like fresh
water from deepest valley.i do felt frustrated sometimes,but that’s
the recharging process for igniting fresh fighting will.
at lunch i sat a table with 5 girls or women.when a tall girl passed
me from my back i noticed her.i don’t know if she was the tall and
strong girl i refered last time but i liked her at once.when she left
and passed by me i notice her leaving again without obvious notice.she
didn’t eat lunch there,but just arrived and soon left.i need a girl,i
longing for love with girl.god know this.maybe i m no young,maybe i m
too fatigured.
bye.i love u.kiss u.

sparse morning sunshine,turned thicker in the afternoon

i got up at 8:59 am and headed to see my baby son at once.first time i forgot to fetch my pda with me.in the way i can’t help doubting if my baby and his mother ok now that dogs losing to their baseline.later at noon his mother told me she attempted to buzz me last night but was interrupted by a need to shit and then forgot it.she suffered faint when went to lavatory and almost fell to ground.i know that’s caused by animosity of dog.my baby avoided me in the old woman’s arms and accepted me after i uncoated and cleaned my cold nose.he sat on my shoulders for quite some time and later asked to play with tapwater which let the old woman very agonized.when its past 10:40 i had to stopped my baby who intensively cried for contest not letting him playing water for he wet his clothes and let the old woman really at a loss.i in a hurry put on my baby and held him outside to receive his mother.he slept on my shoulders after i toddled some time on the road near the school,still sobbing.his mother sometimes lost temper to me and demanded me seeing my baby less frequent.after lunch we had our baby a shower with the volumn of water capable of 3 persons.our baby really enjoyed it and loathed to leave the basin,but his mother fussy with coldness.we played awhile after his mother left.then my baby tended to feel boring.so i started to sing with my highest pitch and he gradually dozed on my shoulders.he slept for about an hour in my songs.the old woman left when i switched singing to whistling.soon my baby woke up and i felt nicer to hold him haunting new place than staying home.so we launched.we visited a supermarket titled shenlong(cult dragon) where i bought him candy,sausage and jelly.we rambled along the busy road and when passing a district with baby playing tools he asked to play on the slide board.we ate sausage and candy and jelly at once and ate a lot.for its chilly we entered another supermarket where we didn’t buy.both market attendants let me sensed my shabby financial position.we also ported in the grocer near his mother’s school.when we played with the mirror of the electronic door of the school 2 little girls of my baby’s colleagues’ daughter opened the door and we followed in,but the watchdog left his room to let us leave.i quarreled with the man and stayed there.his mother angered to me when heard our story.my baby however was not seriously chilled.after dinner i let his mother know i updated her blog and picasaweb album basing shots the day before yesterday on her notebook while our baby looked aside and happy.the net was speedy and we can watch her youtube video online and i commented maybe dog avoid her but only hacking me.i asked for an apple to bring back to dorm,and 3 bag of milk she disliked.that’s our happy day today.

after his parents rejoin in the second snow of the winter


i love u.last night i felt u r likely under deep threat for ur love to me.i love u and hope u can let me know ur scent.kiss u with snow white.
new moon represents my heart for u tonight,which i let my baby seen in the dusk.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

full sunny day.

in the afternoon just after posting i wandered in the sunshine for
about half of an hour.the sun was bright and the wind was mild.quite
some young qrrser left the dorm from the door of the dorm in qrrs’
uniform.i toddled till ill willes let me uncomfortable.so i shifted to
room and continued to toddle in it.later i listened to the radio.the
first song from a familiar song sang in japanese.i knew i had a link
with it.i wondered my family,my baby son,and his mother.i know nothing
can hinder the step of our forward.dogs biting now in the cafe farer
than starsea.they r the remain of shits on this dirty coign of
northeastern of china.
bye.i’d better do some reading.i love u,in this waste piazza.dogs
around me chatted and smoked.i really troubled by the question why
they live in this world.
i love u.kiss u with beer to cleanse.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

bright morning sunshine

i woke up at 7:13 am and got up after 11 am.i busy with restoring my
pda os and reading my posts on it.after lunch,i doubting if buzzed my
baby’s mother but unsure if she returned from her school and give
up.the sunshine is so bright and warm that let me felt
blessed.www.google.com and its analytic is blocked for 2 days but now
available.and i found its analystic very pwerful in offering
analyse.yesterday i first time recently visited starsea cafe and now i
again here.more or less i enjoy its lcd and cheap price of 1 yuan an
hour.
bye.i likely timed out.
i love u.kiss u with bright.

snowing in half day but didn’t entitled a snowy day.

last night after posted in the cafe,i wondered in the dorm.till i felt
quite sure about myself and my previlege to see my baby at my will,i
headed to see my baby at once after 8 pm.before i went to the cafe,
his mother buzzed in inquired me about her problem with her
notebook,she didn’t let me know she was alone with our baby.when i
arrived there she was breasting our baby and the old woman left for 2
days to see her relatives nearby.i felt very sorry for her loneliness
at once.my baby got energetic and played some other time before went
to sleep.we had a nice night.in the mroning her mother arrived to see
our baby as arranged in advance and i still loathe to get up.my baby
let me get up and i found his mother had left to her school.i held my
baby played some time and when his grandmom wanted to play with him i
turned on the notebook and tried awhile surfing on the web.blogger.com
was accessible but google.com and gmail.com inaccessible.soon i fed up
with very slow surfing speed and gave up.his mother returned awhile
and left again to her school.later i held my baby going out to receive
his mother.when we looked at the mirror of the electronic gate the
gate opened for a male staff and the man on his back talked to me i
can enter with an accquaintance with the watchdog.so we entered.soon
we saw his mother leaving.we asked by phone order a dish from the
neighbor restaurant for lunch.after lunch his mother milked him and
fell into sleep.so did my baby, with his mother’s nipper in mouth.so i
went to public bathroom to shower.when i returned home,the son of her
aunt there studying.the grandmom returned and loathed to cook and
suggested to eat out but my baby’s mother wanted to be economic.we
finally ate dinner at home with needle.my baby’s mother tutored a girl
student lately.before the grandmom left i suggested to my baby’s
mother let the grandmom stay there a night but she refused.but my
baby’s mother also refuted my suggestion i stayed there a night
instead.she said now that it will be routine in the future so i
needn’t worry about them.i respected her independence as her shown
many time in our marriage.after dinner she tried to work on her
notebook to prepare test paper for her school as homework and i held
my baby trying killing time.my baby wanted to play with her notebook
but he is always considerable and let his mother finished her
work.then we reunited to play games for about an hour.i left at 8:58
pm even i felt sorry for them.
the snow,as i know should be the scond snow in this winter,finally
didn’t cover the road,just let the rim of the road white.i felt glad
to see its attempt,and hope it arrives more tonight.
bye.i love u.not matter how far u r now from me.kiss u with white.

Friday, November 24, 2006

weak sunny day

its a busy afternoon for me.after posted at noon i went to the libray
of qrrs to borrow 2 pc magzines.then went to the newspaper reading
room in the workers’ palace to read world reference digest (in chinese
‘cankaoxiaoxi’).its very informative but dogs biting heavily.i felt
china in the path steadily leading itself into world war while its
head spare no efforts to boast its earnest hope for ‘human
coexistence’, just like many powder barrel in the prelude of 2 world
wars.there r some problems in the world concerning offering and
giving.china, like many inresponsible seeker after fed up with too
much taking while without thanksgiving.the fruits of democracy, of
god’s leading, of western culture, were shared but the primitives took
a pirate and rober’s stance.china sees its fastest improvement after
opening to the world but just crying for breedings without
feedback.its its problem.its bussiness pattern got bankrupt,got
insustainable.western world can’t afford such a tumor under his
belly.god can’t see sand in his eyes.the swallowing freak and monster
itself can’t live in itself peace.its consuming more and more living
spirits and living spices in peace.it destroyed its most arable land
and dirty its most river.it squeezed into its most young bones and
destoryed its most vivid inspiring of the nation newly
fire-baptised.its now attempted to leak its troubled water into the
world.it bragged its good will all over the world under the title of
‘human something’ while in its backyard sparing no efford to arm it to
its teeth.it sells its responsibilty for expendience anywhere any
time.it can’t hold its laughable shortsighted desire to sat in
limelight and babbled like shits.that’s china in today’s world
stadium.
bye.i love u.kiss u with coming snow.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

weak morning sunshine

i woke up at 8:37 am and got up at 9:59 am.again i felt loathe to get
up.last night i can access blogger.com and blogspot.com without proxy
and now its also accessible directly.it lets me in doubts for quite
some moments in the night in the room.i even review my point and
position this morning.in the morning i listened to the radio after
getting up and dog around let my chest painful.so i launched to haunt
around the area of qrrs.i visited its sports stadium whose door now
was narrowed to allow a man to slide in (the fat even need to slide in
with turning his or her shoulders from 2 sides to a side
foreward.).and its field underwent innovation,covered totally with
clothes.then i went eastern of its part,where near the suburb and now
the cross over road was larged boardened and house aside the roads
enhenced with refurnished or rebuilt.a quite large house of qrrs
turned into the policestation of the municipal gov. ,just behind its
hostel.i doubting what’s the deal,qrrs,a former stateowned enterprise
with some social functions under state planning mechanism,now strived
to extend its hand into municipal function.all those in army rank or
state plannying hierachy now shift themselves into civil service,but
in core still a dicatator,a rober and a stealer,in guise of public
service,like cop.it acting both public service and state force.but in
china they never can hide their brutal use of force to keep common
people from its dictating interest group.china in most history owning
powerer domestic force than its defense force against hostil foreign
nations,cops more than arms.that’s the source of pressing and robery
and dictatory, and source of humiliation in china’s fall in neoteric
history.no civil right,no nationality harmony,but prey of the
reined.they r in fact the biggest enemy of china and they indeed
defensed themself at cost of china,then and now.
after returned to the dorm i again felt unconfortable..i was deserted
in the dustbin and fight to live in rubbish in soundness.
bye.i love u.kiss u with coming snow.

sunny day

i got up at 10:55 am for my pda charging.when i fetched my bike the
gatewatcher insisted asking me how i will deal with the rice qrrs now
dispatching.and i knew its near time for chinese company to dispatch
their wellfare.they with this way to hole their staff tight and mute
to their blacksmith.almost there is no way for chinese company to
survive with legal methods and so every company,no matter how tiny or
how large,had to deal with theft and any other abnormal means against
the its counterparts and high level or low level counterparts to
survive.that’s china’s reality.dogs push anyone into need to
entrenched themselves with dogged method.that’s dog’s plot to turn the
world into dog’s rein.from the basic ethic dog claims anything without
its admision is illegal,and its admision changing at its will,in no
place of a vow or a cord.that’s dication in china,as prc’s
foundamental rule sovereign the mainland.
my baby received me near the door of bedroom and he avoided me as
usual in the old woman’s arms.after i took him he didn’t left my
caress in the morning and afternoon.we went out at 11 am and we ate an
icecream and some soft candies.his mother seemingly not so happy with
me.but we reunited after lunch after she complained surviving priority
to a better life and i persuaded her leting mind overview the reality
and after she breaded our baby and i teased my baby aside.her mother
later arrived in the afternoon and i at once felt her hatred and even
dirty will.my baby asked for playing with water then,against the
sisters’ scorns.i had to let my baby go out to receive his mother in
advance,for my baby got irregular.in outside he peacefully sat on my
shoulders.we went to the south garden where 3 little boys playing
under a tree while a man stood on the rim of a circle round the root
of the tree and talking with his cell phone.we avoided them and after
turned a round my baby still felt the group of playing little boy and
girls attracting him and let me followed them some distance.when we
approached the door of the school i asked about time with a woman
aside and we chatted in english.after received his mother we returned
and his mother told me today is thanksgiving day.i had complained
missing the tasty hunan dish in these day so i suggested we can
gathered for a taste to hunan dish.after dinner we played awhile with
our baby and let him very happy.his mother let me fetch 2 apples and 2
bagged milk,comparing yesterday she pretendingly refusing me fetching
an apple.
on the way to dorm,i met a lot of middle school students on bike or
waiting for bus.i really felt holiday month is near.so i headed to
dorm directly and buzzed my hometown and talked with my mother.on the
way here i felt this year very swift,for i still can remember last
spring festeval’s merry atmospher.a cop car ported near the cafe and
when i arrived the boss laid one of his leg on the reception desk and
immediately 2 cops in uniform entered and one of them asked to talk
with the boss closely.they looked quite familiar.last night before i
left i felt heavily bited and a middle aged man haunted around,and my
torpark slow to respond.
i love u.kiss with with snow and bright.

btw,the torpark in rar at http://benzrad.googlepages.com/or.rar was
password protected against cop’s unauthorized modification.its
password is ‘shitdog’,but still its likely broken.there is likely no
way to avoid surveilance now that they can manipulate byte flow and
remote control all internet cafe within china.torpark is freeware,but
quite some time i can’t download it from its homepage or from any site
in the search result of google.i even can’t download from my
googlepages as refered above.dog showily domineer.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

bright sunshine all day.

in the afternoon i read pc magzine till 4 pm.dogs in the dorm bited
heavily and sometimes forced me notice their plots.after finished both
the pc mags,i left to see my baby.my baby avoided me in the old
woman’s arms for awhile.later i held him playing.he played with
tapwater for quite some time and let the old woman very annoyed.i was
told his mother will leave her school after 7 pm for night lessons.i
felt very longthy.my baby dozed awhile on my shoulders when we toddled
in waiting room and bedroom,but he soon woke up.we ate pinenuts and
nuts.we left home to receive his mother after 6:30 pm and dogs in the
street let my belly painful.the lamps was bright and parents receiving
their children herd.my baby made some loud voice and i screamed to
echo.soon we saw his mother.i copied a soft to make gif file and then
ate dinner.dogs modified the anonymous surfing soft,torpack,i uploaded
to my googlepages at http://benzrad.googlepages.com/or.rar and let it
illworking,hardly open any officially blocked website like bogger.com
or blogspot.com,while i used it on my udisk to surf blogger and
blogspot hadn’t encountered any problem.they broke my account into
midifying my documents and blogs at will,they enjoyed tracing and
stealing and messing as their pleasure,they born thief and
hooligan.and failures after failures they still bug me for their host
can’t afford its losing,its collapse and evaporing.
its a quite nice day.it telling me nothing went wrong.god training me
to be patience and fortitude.nothing out of landscape.
bye.i love u.kiss u with coming snow,the white washed the dirty
black.glory to god.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

uncompetitive morning sunshine

i got up at 9:51 am.these days in dorm i sometimes felt loath to get
up,let me doubting dog’s biting in silence costly for my energy.in the
dawn i dreamed something but now i forgot.after getting up i listened
radio awhile then i went to borrow some pc magzines.more pc magzine
seeing absence there these days than when i first time haunted
here,indicating someone competed with me to borrow them.after retuned
to dorm i started to read one of them.at lunch i ate a fish but still
felt partly filled.the canteen full of qrrsers so i ate my lunch at
room.
i had not too much to utter now.at noon 2 songs in the radio lyrics
missing and i don’t know if u r missing me.
bye.i love u.kiss u with the unbeatable sunshine.

transparent sunshine morning,turned thick in the afternoon

i got up at 9:11 am and headed to see my baby at once.last night i
dreamed a lot,but the sunshine told me nothing special.my baby turned
back into the old woman’s arms when caught sight of me.and i
forcefully held him back after uncoated.i accompanied him playing all
the day.he slept when i reciting chinese traditional poems in the
morning when its almost 9:45 am.the old woman had left to shop.my baby
slept on my shoulders and in my arms for about an hour.after woke up
we went out to receive his mother.the door of the school locked.when a
man on his bike entered we followed to enter but the man on the bike
let us left.i didn’t move.then the watchdog went outside of the
outpost and poised to let us leave.so we left.that really disgusted
me.it let me doubting the reason why all chinese organizations liked
to enclose their territory and set watchdogs.for china was dominated
by dog,they fighted for prey,they divided china society into their
properties.they cleaned all livings alien to them,except their
prey.they r born inferor and they have no way to cooperate with other
living spices and enjoyed the plenty world together.so they r so born
to fight each other,to tear,to bite around.they r born to starve.they
r born to fear,and exert their fear and fright to anything in their
view.they deserve as a tool as a inferior product of human.opening is
their hate and their biggest enemy.human is their second hate and
their second biggest enemy.they r doomed to fight against human in the
end.and its hight time to extingush them from earth from now,as i
claimed in a post within google group,sci.language.
when we saw some of teachers leaving,we sat in front of the door
waiting.2 cops haunted 2 circles.and a car ported near the door block
our view partially.we soon saw my baby’s mother.after lunch i sorted
my pda awhile.then his mother left.i held my baby playing.we both felt
a bit boring.after 2:30 pm he slept on my shoulders when i sang in my
full pitch.first he slept sound near my left ear.after an hour he
partially awoke but loath to open his eyes.i shaked him up and we
started to eat pine nuts.we had a good time eating while chatting.we
went out to receive his mother after 4:00 pm.we ate a stick of sugared
gourd.when teachers leaving my baby directed us slide in.but a tall
watchdog murmured behind us,likely saying their boss warned not to let
us in.so we left and his mother catched us just near the door.i ate
dinner there.my baby pretended to watch tv concentratedly to ignore my
leaving and let us both smile.he now showily kept distance from me.he
really emotionally smart.
today is a nice day as anticipate.the weather forecast in the radio
let snow for two days but its warm and sunny both day.but the night is
cold.maybe next morning i can see white.
bye.i love u as usual.kiss u with bright.

Monday, November 20, 2006

pale afternoon but sometimes the sun is clear with clouds.

the cafe charged me 2 yuan even i just used 1 hour and 7 minutes.i
felt sorry for myself for exceed budget.in the room i felt had to rest
awhile,likely being bited heavily in the cafe which is very hot and 2
boys later aside me let me quite unconfortable.i read my post on my
pda till 2:30 pm.then i went to the libray of qrrs to borrow 2 pc
magzines.i went there on foot.a young man arrived there just before
me.i started to skim the encyclopedias when the man chatted with the
librarain.then the librarain let me wait her awhile for she had to
leav e for a moment.then i read a pc mag there and felt being
bited.returned to the room in the dorm,biting even heavier when i sat
facing the window to read.however i finished one copy.i just sense a
new wave of challenge launched after some peaceful days of break
passed.
no matter how illwilled the surrounding things,i had no worry to
hindersight.i know and stand in my position.the world in my view rests
on my shoulders.i had the id to respond to it,as the bible says,my
bread is the task my Father set to me.
bye.i love u.kiss u with the pure white of coming snow.i love u like
the roll in rolling.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

pale morning sunshine

i got up at 10:55 am.last night likely dirty willes thick and i almost
wet dreamed.in the dawn i dreamed attending the funeral of the eldest
brother of my dad in my hometown.the music for the funeral very coarse
and loudly.then the watchwoman of the dorm knocked my door to let me
receive a phone call.its from the group mornitor of my once working
place,saying last time i admitted to attend work time why i didn’t
attend so far.and asked me to call the department director.i returned
to dorm to continue my sleep.till 10 am i turned on my radio which
elaberate if grandparents caring their grand child should charge for
the parents.i knew a new web plotted by dog aiming trapping me into
machinery dog system launched for years in the short history of
prc.the group mornitor,a graduate once boasting his coorperation with
the nasty local hooligans within the organization now has a taste to
his descend.all the graduates now chose the pits set by the gov. to
let him temporarily partake the state power or public service left
with the same outlet,the same dustbin.they doomed to live in
humdrum,in mediocre.china now manipulated and monopolied by dog,which
refute any inprovement and progress except its biting teeth to steal
and prey,its dirty spying eyes putting anyone into foul or
criminal.anything original can be stained,anything with grace can only
be withered with the dominant dirty around.that’s the fate of prc.
bye.i love u.kiss u with mops of pale cloud.
dog hindered my download of anonymous surfing soft now.

pale sunny afternoon

in the morning when i surfed in the cafe,it turned to be slower and
slower to return a page from the net.dogs these days determined to
show their unabled to afford to lose.soon after i arrived my baby’s
mother’s home his mother returned when i just prepared my baby to
haunt outside.then i want to show my blog update within my googlepages
at http://benzrad.googlepages.com ,and i launched to set my
googlepages on her notebook.the all afternoon spent fruitlessly
attempting setting it but dog hampered my googlepages to
published.each time when i attempt to save modification and publish it
it let the page popup windown saying can’t save while its
disconnected.but it in fact online.it even let the popup window
showing from google.com.it really can shame anyone with its foul.
after i finished my shower in the public bathroom,my baby’s mother
held him went to see her mother.i tried again.after again being hacked
i gave up and left.on the way i met my baby and his mother so we
returned her home.there i ate dinner.i drank a bottle of bear to let
go the dirty after dancing with dogs.
returned to the dorm i listened awhile radio.and i felt better surfing
with crowd to avoid concentrated hack when i single out in the few
cafe users.
after all ,it s a nice day.i did what i can envised.dog’s hacking and
blocks only remind me how far yet the reality under dog’s surveilance
lagging me,lagging the advance of china,and urged me to fight with
more energy.
bye.i lvoe u.kiss u with the pure white of the coming snow.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

limp morning sunshine

i got up at 8:41 am.last night the dog’s bite is faint.i fell into
sleep after some waits.the cafe in which i lost its register card
finally didn’t return the key money i handed in of 10 yuan by delaying
to deal with my problem and let me trying to find back.it can be
safely to claim that in nowaday china dogged by dog there is no grace
anywhere anyway.every vendors compete to be bitchy.for there is no way
to warrent common people,common cusumers’ interests.social gathering
banned or under tighten surveilance.individule complains directed to
cops or civil department where to detain.
in the dawn i dreamed one of my college alumni,chenxinjian,handling a
task of dispatching and returning a form in which likes a population
survey to fill in ur name detailedly.then i envisioned a web service
to let people register their name online and write down their tour to
tourism on web and let the web constructs the virtual map of the
landscape,maybe a bit like google earth.in the end of the dream i saw
a chinese .com titled shushen(learner) or shutong(pupil) strived to
offer this kind of service.
its a ordinary sunny morning.last night i worked here for 4 hours to
modify my googlepages as well as my baby’s mother’s.i will see my baby
after posted here.
bye,i love u.kiss u.

ordinary sunny afternoon

the cafe i surfed in the morning banned modifying its ie settings so i
can’t use proxy.my email blog to blogger.com was blocked or captured
while email to post to googlegroup succeeded.when i arrived my baby’s
mother’s home his grandmom there.i soon held him outside to receive
his mother.on the way he fell into sleep on my shoulders.when his
mother appeared in the crowd of the students he woke up.we ate some
croakers at lunch.after lunch i busy with boasting my work last night
for making her googlepages ready and she admitted it.then the two old
sisters went to shower and my baby was held by his mother haunting
outside,leaving me alone trying to do some final touch to her
googlepages.but i soon fed up with slow speed and gave up.then i
operated on pc offline to sort my sd card of my pda,and attempting to
find my heading works when i worked for qrrs cable tv but in vain.time
glides and then all members returned.my baby slept sound in his
mother’s arms and till i finished my dinner he woke up from bedroom.we
ate dumplines at dinner.then i docked a cafe far from qrrs dorm zone
but near then the cafe i surfed in the morning.i tried quite some pcs
but most of its front usb port was disabled.and in the process i lost
its registry card.it took me 10 yuan as key money and likely a dispute
awaiting me.
bye.i love u.kiss u with jeer.

heavily hacked.proxy mostly blocked.google logined but returned a
interface without due logined information while open www.gmail.com it
open ur email box.dog captured and manipulated byte flows.

ordinary sunny morning

last night my baby’s mother asked for net storage for her video file
in our daily bless and i felt she now become enjoying cyberspace.so i
felt encouraged to went to cafe again after 9 pm to publish her
googlepages and registered her another youtube account.i finished
after 11 pm.before i finished some persons haunted around my seat and
i was heavily bited.however,i felt accomplished on the way returning
to dorm.in the night i felt weakest bite on me,but i however still
fell into sleep a bit late.i had to get up to make water before i fell
into sleep.in the dawn i remembered i dreamed first a man determined
to improve railway’s efficience and offer people a cheaper and faster
railway.but he was hunted by a laidoff of railway,likely a foremore
watchman.but the determined man finally succeeded.then i was brought
into the western area of china and there an old woman whose hometown
was eastern of china collecting a lots of old coins of ancient china
and with a woman caring her.she had a nice sword and won anothe young
woman by only a poise in their compete.in the end we r on a train to
eastern china and its aftermath i can’t memory now.
its peaceful cafe till now.i first time enjoy the widescreen lcd of
brand acer.gamers babbled but that’s the pleisure of digital life.i
will saw my baby after posted here.i can’t see the width and depth of
surveilance of dog but i enjoyed the peace by now.last night in cafe
after i posted my email to my blogger successfully via proxy and just
when i browseing a political group within google group the web was cut
off.and i had to switched to surf without proxy.so the surveilance
penetrating the proxy,through the byte flow.every internet cafe’s
registeration card seemingly serialized in the united number
series,indicating from a centual monitor.
bye.i love u.china never can seperate from the world.the brutal
surveilance system by dog and its dictated host never survived a
century.changes underwent unnoticeable.i saw the world under god’s
united kingdom all over.
kiss u with bright.

ordinary sunny afternoon

the cafe i surfed in the morning banned modifying its ie settings so i
can’t use proxy.my email blog to blogger.com was blocked or captured
while email to post to googlegroup succeeded.when i arrived my baby’s
mother’s home his grandmom there.i soon held him outside to receive
his mother.on the way he fell into sleep on my shoulders.when his
mother appeared in the crowd of the students he woke up.we ate some
croakers at lunch.after lunch i busy with boasting my work last night
for making her googlepages ready and she admitted it.then the two old
sisters went to shower and my baby was held by his mother haunting
outside,leaving me alone trying to do some final touch to her
googlepages.but i soon fed up with slow speed and gave up.then i
operated on pc offline to sort my sd card of my pda,and attempting to
find my heading works when i worked for qrrs cable tv but in vain.time
glides and then all members returned.my baby slept sound in his
mother’s arms and till i finished my dinner he woke up from bedroom.we
ate dumplines at dinner.then i docked a cafe far from qrrs dorm zone
but near then the cafe i surfed in the morning.i tried quite some pcs
but most of its front usb port was disabled.and in the process i lost
its registry card.it took me 10 yuan as key money and likely a dispute
awaiting me.
bye.i love u.kiss u with jeer.

heavily hacked.proxy mostly blocked.google logined but returned a
interface without due logined information while open www.gmail.com it
open ur email box.dog captured and manipulated byte flows.

0 comments  



{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 5

Friday, November 17, 2006

clear warm sunny day.

 

last night after returning to the dorm,my baby’s mother soon buzzed in
and in our talk she was very cordial.then i do some reading to the
autobiography of Margaret Hilda Thatcher while leting the rodio
on.after 10 pm i wandered awhile in the room and fell into deep love
and deep sorrow for my baby.i sorry i didn’t choose the internet cafe
near his mother’s home when i knew i had choice to pick a closer cafe
with a more possible to visit him after posting, but i chose a near
cafe to discipline myself and my baby.in a moment i decided to visit
my baby and stay there a night to compensate my sorrow.then i headed
on when its almost 11 pm.when i arrived the house was dark and after i
turned on bedroom lamp i found his mother breasting him.i held his arm
and felt so dear.after i settled his mother spent quite some time to
let him sleep.and i had a very sound and consolidated sleep.in the
morning his mother got up early to put him on but i just felt
sleepy,for recently i never got up so early.when they ate their
breakfast my baby approached me to wake me up to eat,and i got up
immediately.the morning spent holding my baby playing in the rooms.he
just like to play with all the household materials.when its 10:30 am i
held him outside to receive his mother.just after we got to the ground
he slept on my shoulders and he slept about an hour outside.thx the
sun so bright and warm,he slept very sound.when we turned around and
found the door of the school open and we entered.just a few steps we
saw his mother coming on her bike.at lunch i turned on tv and watch
cctv news and commented the most thing i like to do with cctv was to
dissect it,for its really smothering,quite some original provincial tv
like hunan tv and zhejiang tv,all fade into humdrum for had no access
to independent news under the nowaday censory.then i talked about a
topic detailed last night radio about some universities limited their
students from using their pc by cut down power supply after 0 pm or
even 10:30 pm,i commented dog always likes biting.then i suddenly
recognized at least one of daughters of the old woman married a
cop.maybe her own husband also a cop.i laid aside the idea when i let
my baby playing most of the afternoon,but when its near 4 pm i took a
glimpse into the possiblity of the spy of the old woman and possible
plot concocted by cops around my baby and my old family.then the old
woman urged me to leave.she warmed up some bean juice with mahua(fried
needle) for my baby,when i commented its tasteless she replied my baby
liked it.since the old woman arrived the home was stuffed with all
kinds of biscuits and fruits.i never fed my baby soon frequently daily
with those boughted packed foods.she also seldom cook a changing
diet.most of time in winter our dish was carrot and cabbage sliced
into pieces.my baby sensed my leaving and asked for the caress of the
old woman in advance,leting me doubting her silent exertion on my baby
in these days.
however,she was leaving.my baby’s mother told me last time she will be
replaced by the kid sister of her mother.no matter how the evils
brewing,none can harm my baby in fact and indeed.that’s my
understanding to the final.
bye.i love u.in these days i also felt hatred toward u and sometimes
indifferent to ur presence.but quite sometimes i felt ur message,ur
love to me must be under deep distort by the animosity and i sure we r
the loved and the coupled with their fruits.
kiss u with bright.

 

 

Thursday, November 16, 2006

weak sunshine afternoon

 

i finished registering my account at www.livejournal.com at
http://benzillar.livejournal.com then left.before i finished a dog
seated aside,likely a cop in guise.the cafe titled freedom cafe but
still its very slow when i open a web page,indicating under
supervision of dog.afternoon i laid on bed listening radio but later
the power was cut temperary for about an hour and i stayed in
silence.dog hunting around and let me uncomfortable.sometimes i felt
feeding up with dog but i calmed myself that they just let me remember
my responsibility to cover their corpses with earth on time the day
they doomed.the three cafes near the dorm zone all likely wired to
monitor me, and i lost most of my time on web these days to read my
google contents for i had to fight for a viable proxy to post to my
blog at blogger.its a hunting but i was just bugged to unease.the day
they lose seen by all foresighted people.
bye.i love u.kiss u with blossom.

 

sunny morning

 

i got up at 11:09 am.last night some illwishes lingered on my body
indifferent directions let me doubt if they r from women.i fenced it
lately and had to get up to make water in midnight.all the dawn i in
dream seemingly doubting if and where i should find myself another
blog site against the possible blocking and pretension by chinese
cops.my blog at myspace.com never blocked but any members of myspace
can’t be open for quite some time,indicating hacking or hajacked.my
blog at blogger suffered blocking and hajacking.my only blog within
china at blogcn.com,likely under censory for posting had to wait a day
to display.dogs extending their tent to the most of their ability to
trap me.
bye.i love u.no near no far.kiss u with bright.

 

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

clear sunny day.

 

i woke up at 8:23 am and got up at 9:00 am.i dreamed the ceremony of
the prc’s foundation,in which mao acted as a crabbed host and zhude
offer a lecture of reciting his poem in traditional chinese poem
form.i went to see my baby son at once.my baby again hide himself in
the hug of the old woman when caught sight of me.but he immediately
approached me and cried when i insisted kissing his leg.all morning i
held him playing at home,till near 10:30 he slept on my shoulders.i
tied him with a carpet of whose two side i held tight to keep warm and
rest his wrest when he slept on my neck.his mother’s return woke him
up and his mother busy with let me restore her os and installed again
the domestic antivirus soft titled rising.after lunch we played with
our baby awhile while continuing installation and backup.then we
haunted outside.his mother headed to her school and we toddled on the
street toward the school.when we arrived there and found its door half
open we slided in.a class there having sport lesson and we played on
the yard and gradually approached the teaching building.some students
on the corridor cleaning the ladder and stainless steel bar of the
ladder.my baby stood motionlessly there watched them working.some
teachers acquainted with us.even i felt we r venturing to enter the
working area but we finally retreated to the outer yard again without
any retardment in the building while some men and women busy around.in
the sports yard we played awhile a ditched football till his mother
catched us and urged us to leave.my baby cried awhile after left the
school and i bought an icecream and a bag of inflation food for him
and he demanded eating the icecream at once and we did.he liked the
icecream.i bought some dates(zhao) from the fruit shop on the way,in
memory my search for u.we again played on the waiting room and when i
started to sing loudly my baby slept on my shoulders again.from 3:30
to 4:30 he slept sound on my neck.when i attempted to shift him to bed
he woke up.and i returned after my baby peacefully farewelled to me.

at dinner i sat a table with 3 girls likely middle school students.i
drank a bottle of bear for the dish is greasy.when i let out bubble
from my belly,the girl facing me responded and let me smiled a lot.

last night in the cafe i was heavily hacked.a website of www.pxdxa.com
was blocked for quite some time and let me doubting if its shut.so
when i surf with proxy i checked it and found its well working.so i
started to download my pda a doc editor but dogs not let me having it
to correct my blog they frequently modified within my account they
broke in and let the pc hanged.i reset two times but it still
illworking,so i changed a pc but it again being hacked to err and when
i killed some suspectable process it rebooted itself.then i left.dog
really saw more and more their losing.

bye.i love u.kiss u with warm heart.

 

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

all day sunny.

 

the air is warm.the sky is clear.i went to the library of qrrs to
borrow 3 copies of pc magzines.i read one of it thoroughly in the
sunshine in room.dogs bited around when i read.the cafe’s boss likely
a dog.last time he pretending sleeping on the chair on my back and
laid a leg on a stool pointed me.that and other dogs in the cafe let
me unconfortable for all the time i surfed there.this time he peeked
his head around me and retreated when catched sight of me far from the
sight of the recept desk of the cafe.dogs just out of their track.

its a busy afternoon for me,for i kept reading till dinner time.in
fact i almost forgot the time to dinner.but i m also at leisure,for pc
magzine entertained me.at dinner there r quite some young girls likely
lodged middle school students of qrrs’ middle school.i don’t hesitate
a second to sit aside the table they sat.they r just so eyes
attacting.

dogs biting now.i had not so much to utter now.i just felt its a long
time in today and felt relaxed by tomorrow’s visiting my baby son.i
love life like this,no matter how lonely my heart in search for
girls,in searching u.

bye.i will do some reading on web.i love u.kiss u with lightened heart.

 

beautiful sunshine.

 

i woke up at 8:03 am and started to listen radio when its just to 9:00
am.dogs let me urgent to make water but i held it till after 8 am.the
economic channel of beijing’s centual radio reporting iron demands
slumping and retail price of agriculture and house increasing.but the
stock market soaring.i always felt puzzled when the cpc claimed from
their sovereign the country was a whole unity and all property share
and all member of the people r workers of the country,how can it
breeds so many stockholders.these interest groups or blocks or dots
within the unity or outside of the unity and bargain with the unity?if
within the unity,if the one unity died?if its outside of the unity
then from the start the unity was not a unity,but a dominating one
with other unities.if the prc was a mighty master with arm force,how
can its servants,those high rank cardres with well salary,hold their
restrains not to steal the property of his master,esp. when now they
earn high salary and bargain in the stock market with stateowned
enterprises’ stateowned shares,ie the master,and those free
enterpreneurs and foreigh investors, with their salary as their
capital? or if the new products as surplus of the unity and dispersed
among its members including the master and its servants according to
their contributions,as the marxism claimed the source of the commence
of private property,who will judge the distribution righteous? i
always felt the china stock market just a unreal cheating arena to
money laundry the stealing cardres’ theft.i only know russia dispersed
all stateowned enterprise equally to its people and after that can be
a free market to be found,and i think that’s probably the only way to
deal with china’s stateowned property.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bright.

 

Monday, November 13, 2006

started to uncomparable sunshine in afternoon.

 

i got up at 9:13 am.i dreamed temporarily lived in a family with a son and a daughter and their parents.my elder brother and our once old bull also appeared in my dream.after woke up i knew my second elder brother and my second elder sister endured the hardest time in our grand father’s youth as well as the new republic and they had the will and reservation for a boarder dream not paler than mine.
when i arrived my baby received me happily.but he cried to refuse my kissing his leg but i did on my own.i held him playing the basin in which there r some used water.he messed up all cook utensils available.he slept on my shoulders when its near 10:30 am and woke up when his mother returned at 11:30 am.after lunch we haunted outside as i suggested to shot.we went to sports yard where a crowd of elemental school students there and watched us shotting.after returned home i busy with sorting the sd card while his mother milked him.when his mother left for her school he approached me to ask for my attending him.all afternoon he insisted my caress him to play.we really had a good time even i frequently want to continue my work on pc.he slept when its 3:30 pm on my neck for an hour.i sang a lot when he sleeping.we watched tv peacefully after he woke up till his mother returned.then i busy with backup shots to my udisk.after dinner i left and ported here to write u and published our shots.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bright.hope the snow bring u clean and clear mind.
btw, the post titled ‘pale morning,now snowing. ‘ posted on Nov. 12 including a line reads ‘who shown the caligraphy of his father,likely named xiaqing(summer cyan),who experted at handwriting and crave and also a worker’s model medalist as being a middle school teacher for qrrs’ school as i known.’,in which the ‘crave’ should be ‘carve’,i meant seal carving,in chinese zhuanke.
for blogger was blocked by chinese dogs.u can still read it via my google doc.
my blog from 2006.8.10–11.9
my blog update after 20066.11.9

baby in first serious snow in the winter

 

baby in the first serious snow in the winter

 

baby in the first serious snow in the winter in nearby sports yard.

 

Sunday, November 12, 2006

afternoon snow finally let it like a real snow of winter.

 

when i left the cafe at noon its snowing and continously in the
afternoon.i roamed in the snow in the tree yard of the dorm zone.some
little students there attending class there sliding on the ice and let
me befirended.i toddled for about an hour.snow gathered on my suite
but it didn’t wet it.then i returned room and wandering and
wondering.later i listened radio on bed.then read autobiography of
Margaret Hilda Thatcher,the former primer of uk.till 4:20 pm i laid it
down and ready to left for dinner.after dinner i sorted my family
email list within my gmail and most of the an hour passed.now i m
ready to leave.dog’s biting restlessly.
bye.i love u.my seat near the lavatory which is smelly.so i wouldn’t
kiss u.the white snow blesses u.its so refreshing,so ehchanting.thx
god.

 

pale morning,now snowing.

 

i woke up after 7 am and started to listen radio at 9:18 am.in the dawn i dreamed one of my once colleague named xiaxiaodan(summer little red),who shown the caligraphy of his father,likely named xiaqing(summer cyan),who experted at handwriting and crave and also a worker’s model medalist as being a middle school teacher for qrrs’ school as i known.the grandson and granddaughter busy practising handwriting under his influence.then i in a sports yard and i jogged on the track and found soccor training team.then some young men playing poker on the yard.they r likely offspring of wellbeing and gangsters,both have lots of leisure time.then their wifes replaced them to playing there and they shifted to a table farer the side of the yard to play.dogs biting while i stayed on bed listening radio and then i recalled ur possible interaction with me.i got up near 10 am.

after lunch i here busy with sorting my contacts list,mainly my own and my son and his mother’s email accounts.i likely to exceed 1 hour here this time even i felt sorry.but in fact with the 50 yuan from my once working place i didn’t bankrupt my budget of lodge and board.

the snow likely stopped.i hope she can help me clean my hot brain with contnuous snowing.

bye.i love u.kiss u with cool.

 

weak sunshine afternoon

 

i finished registering my account at www.livejournal.com at
http://benzillar.livejournal.com then left.before i finished a dog
seated aside,likely a cop in guise.the cafe titled freedom cafe but
still its very slow when i open a web page,indicating under
supervision of dog.afternoon i laid on bed listening radio but later
the power was cut temperary for about an hour and i stayed in
silence.dog hunting around and let me uncomfortable.sometimes i felt
feeding up with dog but i calmed myself that they just let me remember
my responsibility to cover their corpses with earth on time the day
they doomed.the three cafes near the dorm zone all likely wired to
monitor me, and i lost most of my time on web these days to read my
google contents for i had to fight for a viable proxy to post to my
blog at blogger.its a hunting but i was just bugged to unease.the day
they lose seen by all foresighted people.
bye.i love u.kiss u with blossom.

 

sunny morning

 

i got up at 11:09 am.last night some illwishes lingered on my body
indifferent directions let me doubt if they r from women.i fenced it
lately and had to get up to make water in midnight.all the dawn i in
dream seemingly doubting if and where i should find myself another
blog site against the possible blocking and pretension by chinese
cops.my blog at myspace.com never blocked but any members of myspace
can’t be open for quite some time,indicating hacking or hajacked.my
blog at blogger suffered blocking and hajacking.my only blog within
china at blogcn.com,likely under censory for posting had to wait a day
to display.dogs extending their tent to the most of their ability to
trap me.
bye.i love u.no near no far.kiss u with bright.

 

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

clear sunny day.
Category: Life

 

i woke up at 8:23 am and got up at 9:00 am.i dreamed the ceremony of the prc’s foundation,in which mao acted as a crabbed host and zhude offer a lecture of reciting his poem in traditional chinese poem form.i went to see my baby son at once.my baby again hide himself in the hug of the old woman when caught sight of me.but he immediately approached me and cried when i insisted kissing his leg.all morning i held him playing at home,till near 10:30 he slept on my shoulders.i tied him with a carpet of whose two side i held tight to keep warm and rest his wrest when he slept on my neck.his mother’s return woke him up and his mother busy with let me restore her os and installed again the domestic antivirus soft titled rising.after lunch we played with our baby awhile while continuing installation and backup.then we haunted outside.his mother headed to her school and we toddled on the street toward the school.when we arrived there and found its door half open we slided in.a class there having sport lesson and we played on the yard and gradually approached the teaching building.some students on the corridor cleaning the ladder and stainless steel bar of the ladder.my baby stood motionlessly there watched them working.some teachers acquainted with us.even i felt we r venturing to enter the working area but we finally retreated to the outer yard again without any retardment in the building while some men and women busy around.in the sports yard we played awhile a ditched football till his mother catched us and urged us to leave.my baby cried awhile after left the school and i bought an icecream and a bag of inflation food for him and he demanded eating the icecream at once and we did.he liked the icecream.i bought some dates(zhao) from the fruit shop on the way,in memory my search for u.we again played on the waiting room and when i started to sing loudly my baby slept on my shoulders again.from 3:30 to 4:30 he slept sound on my neck.when i attempted to shift him to bed he woke up.and i returned after my baby peacefully farewelled to me.

at dinner i sat a table with 3 girls likely middle school students.i drank a bottle of bear for the dish is greasy.when i let out bubble from my belly,the girl facing me responded and let me smiled a lot.

last night in the cafe i was heavily hacked.a website of www.pxdxa.com was blocked for quite some time and let me doubting if its shut.so when i surf with proxy i checked it and found its well working.so i started to download my pda a doc editor but dogs not let me having it to correct my blog they frequently modified within my account they broke in and let the pc hanged.i reset two times but it still illworking,so i changed a pc but it again being hacked to err and when i killed some suspectable process it rebooted itself.then i left.dog really saw more and more their losing.

bye.i love u.kiss u with warm heart.

7:06 PM0 Comments0 KudosAdd CommentEdit Remove

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

all day sunny.
Category: Life

 

 the air is warm.the sky is clear.i went to the library of qrrs to borrow 3 copies of pc magzines.i read one of it thoroughly in the sunshine in room.dogs bited around when i read.the cafe’s boss likely a dog.last time he pretending sleeping on the chair on my back and laid a leg on a stool pointed me.that and other dogs in the cafe let me unconfortable for all the time i surfed there.this time he peeked his head around me and retreated when catched sight of me far from the sight of the recept desk of the cafe.dogs just out of their track.

its a busy afternoon for me,for i kept reading till dinner time.in fact i almost forgot the time to dinner.but i m also at leisure,for pc magzine entertained me.at dinner there r quite some young girls likely lodged middle school students of qrrs’ middle school.i don’t hesitate a second to sit aside the table they sat.they r just so eyes attacting.

dogs biting now.i had not so much to utter now.i just felt its a long time in today and felt relaxed by tomorrow’s visiting my baby son.i love life like this,no matter how lonely my heart in search for girls,in searching u.

bye.i will do some reading on web.i love u.kiss u with lightened heart.

6:02 PM0 Comments0 KudosAdd CommentEdit Remove

 

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

beautiful sunshine.
Category: Life

i woke up at 8:03 am and started to listen radio when its just to 9:00 am.dogs let me urgent to make water but i held it till after 8 am.the economic channel of beijing’s centual radio reporting iron demands slumping and retail price of agriculture and house increasing.but the stock market soaring.i always felt puzzled when the cpc claimed from their sovereign the country was a whole unity and all property share and all member of the people r workers of the country,how can it breeds so many stockholders.these interest groups or blocks or dots within the unity or outside of the unity and bargain with the unity?if within the unity,if the one unity died?if its outside of the unity then from the start the unity was not a unity,but a dominating one with other unities.if the prc was a mighty master with arm force,how can its servants,those high rank cardres with well salary,hold their restrains not to steal the property of his master,esp. when now they earn high salary and bargain in the stock market with stateowned enterprises’ stateowned shares,ie the master,and those free enterpreneurs and foreigh investors, with their salary as their capital? or if the new products as surplus of the unity and dispersed among its members including the master and its servants according to their contributions,as the marxism claimed the source of the commence of private property,who will judge the distribution righteous? i always felt the china stock market just a unreal cheating arena to money laundry the stealing cardres’ theft.i only know russia dispersed all stateowned enterprise equally to its people and after that can be a free market to be found,and i think that’s probably the only way to deal with china’s stateowned property.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bright.

10:20 AM0 Comments0 KudosAdd CommentEdit Remove

 

Monday, November 13, 2006

started to uncomparable sunshine in afternoon.
Category: Life

i got up at 9:13 am.i dreamed temporarily lived in a family with a son and a daughter and their parents.my elder brother and our once old bull also appeared in my dream.after woke up i knew my second elder brother and my second elder sister endured the hardest time in our grand father’s youth as well as the new republic and they had the will and reservation for a boarder dream not paler than mine.
when i arrived my baby received me happily.but he cried to refuse my kissing his leg but i did on my own.i held him playing the basin in which there r some used water.he messed up all cook utensils available.he slept on my shoulders when its near 10:30 am and woke up when his mother returned at 11:30 am.after lunch we haunted outside as i suggested to shot.we went to sports yard where a crowd of elemental school students there and watched us shotting.after returned home i busy with sorting the sd card while his mother milked him.when his mother left for her school he approached me to ask for my attending him.all afternoon he insisted my caress him to play.we really had a good time even i frequently want to continue my work on pc.he slept when its 3:30 pm on my neck for an hour.i sang a lot when he sleeping.we watched tv peacefully after he woke up till his mother returned.then i busy with backup shots to my udisk.after dinner i left and ported here to write u and published our shots.
bye.i love u.kiss u with bright.hope the snow bring u clean and clear mind.
btw, the post titled ‘pale morning,now snowing. ‘ posted on Nov. 12 including a line reads ‘who shown the caligraphy of his father,likely named xiaqing(summer cyan),who experted at handwriting and crave and also a worker’s model medalist as being a middle school teacher for qrrs’ school as i known.’,in which the ‘crave’ should be ‘carve’,i meant seal carving,in chinese zhuanke.
for blogger was blocked by chinese dogs.u can still read it via my google doc.
my blog from 2006.8.10–11.9
my blog update after 20066.11.9

baby in first serious snow in the winter

afternoon snow finally let it like a real snow of winter.

 

when i left the cafe at noon its snowing and continously in the
afternoon.i roamed in the snow in the tree yard of the dorm zone.some
little students there attending class there sliding on the ice and let
me befirended.i toddled for about an hour.snow gathered on my suite
but it didn’t wet it.then i returned room and wandering and
wondering.later i listened radio on bed.then read autobiography of
Margaret Hilda Thatcher,the former primer of uk.till 4:20 pm i laid it
down and ready to left for dinner.after dinner i sorted my family
email list within my gmail and most of the an hour passed.now i m
ready to leave.dog’s biting restlessly.
bye.i love u.my seat near the lavatory which is smelly.so i wouldn’t
kiss u.the white snow blesses u.its so refreshing,so ehchanting.thx
god.

 

pale morning,now snowing.

 

i woke up after 7 am and started to listen radio at 9:18 am.in the dawn i dreamed one of my once colleague named xiaxiaodan(summer little red),who shown the caligraphy of his father,likely named xiaqing(summer cyan),who experted at handwriting and crave and also a worker’s model medalist as being a middle school teacher for qrrs’ school as i known.the grandson and granddaughter busy practising handwriting under his influence.then i in a sports yard and i jogged on the track and found soccor training team.then some young men playing poker on the yard.they r likely offspring of wellbeing and gangsters,both have lots of leisure time.then their wifes replaced them to playing there and they shifted to a table farer the side of the yard to play.dogs biting while i stayed on bed listening radio and then i recalled ur possible interaction with me.i got up near 10 am.

after lunch i here busy with sorting my contacts list,mainly my own and my son and his mother’s email accounts.i likely to exceed 1 hour here this time even i felt sorry.but in fact with the 50 yuan from my once working place i didn’t bankrupt my budget of lodge and board.

the snow likely stopped.i hope she can help me clean my hot brain with contnuous snowing.

bye.i love u.kiss u with cool.

 

Saturday, November 11, 2006

extraordinary sunny day.

 

i got up at 8:49 am and immediate to see my baby.his mother at home when i arrived and she is busy with shot my baby and me.when i started to sort the sd card of the camera his mother left.i held my baby playing till the old woman left and my baby became irritated for being sleepy.i hurried to find his coat and left the home.he sat silently on my shoulders when i passed the grocers aside the street toward his mother’s school.when we started to walk outside around the south garden and when i started to sing he fell into sleep.i stayed in front of the front gate of south garden,facing the bright sun,and stalked.when i felt better to see if his mother’s school’s door open throught the south garden western door,he woke up on my neck.he directed me to turn back to pick a shortcut to the western door but i hinted him to buy some snacks.he admitted it and i bought him a bag of rice biscuit and we ate at once.the door of his mother’s school later opened and we slided in.we entered the classroom building and waited his mother on the first floor passway.he also practised to move on the steep ladders of the passway with my hands in his hands.soon the crowd of students leaving,some girl students kissed my baby’s cheek.we finally met his mother and he asked his mother to hold him to watch the side building’s corridor.we all felt glad.at lunch he insisted playing spool and till his mother can’t afford his spoiling soup.after lunch he was sent to sleep after milked.so did his mother and the old woman.i went alone to shower.after i returned his mother again started to shot him with the old woman and the son of his mother’s aunt.then i bragged my knowledge on digital home to his mother and all of them kept listening.my baby busy with playing aside till i finished my bubble and in high spirit.at dinner i drank a tin of beer and my baby also tasted some of it.we had a good time full day.
last night the dogs bited heavily but later i felt its u missing me and i started to consider our relation.the bright sun in daytime let me feel i m under bless of u.
its really a nice sunny day.so auspicious.i know u r in the mood of deep love to me.i felt glad seeing the bright of our piteful love.
bye.i love u.kiss u with sunshine.
some shots by his mother.

 

Son in winter at home

 

Son in winter at home in a extraordinary sunny day.

 

Friday, November 10, 2006

pale afternoon

 

i laid myself on bed most of the afternoon.first part i listening
music,then in silence,then listening then roamed in the room.i
reviewed my family life when i was a boy.my mother’s love among our
brothers.i also recalled my best friend in college,qiuxiaolin,and
bianbaqiongda,a taibet paiting student in tianjin art college.they let
me smile and in understanding to their kindness.i also saw the girl
haunted in the dorm canteen these days in my mind eyes.she is a tall
girl with admirable figure,a little bit stronger than u.i always
prefer slim girl,but she also let me burning.i don’t know where she
from and who she is,but i know i m weak in girl’s fondness.days and
nights turns my heart for girl’s love more drought.and fears and tears
turns me more prone to melt in sweet heart or sheep’s eye.
at dinner,i arrived earlier in the aim to meet the girl.but just met a
cop in uniform there.regarding the authority of the state force i felt
laughable.i watched tv which live skill skate contest and i enjoyed a
couple show from us.i know i was blessed.
bye.i love u.kiss u with more snow in sight.

btw,in the post of nov. 9th titled ‘sunny morning’ there was a line :
‘last night i dreamed of chenlong(become
dragon),the hongkang kongfu actor,whose son named
fangzuming,interviewed with our a semester including 4 or 5 children
including a white girl and teached by show his acting in movies.’,it
likely should be ‘last night i dreamed of chenlong(become
dragon),the hongkang kongfu actor,whose son named
fangzuming,interviewed with our a seminar including 4 or 5 children
including a white girl and teached by show his acting in movies.’ i
sometimes confused by ‘semester’ and ‘seminar’.

 

sunny morning.

 

i got up after 9 am.i stayed in quilt listening radio for quite some
time.the day light on the curtain is so bright that let me doubting if
its snow covered outside.after getting up i listened to the economic
channel of centual radio from beijing relayed by local radio in fm
band.the stock market soaring.the high cardres busying bailing out the
deposit of the republic to their private pocket for a ready to desert
the main land.they can leave a bankrupt government to the common
people,like a paper tiger as mao sneered once at us.most of the people
on mainland deserved it for their inactiveness to robery and pressing
in the short history of prc.
bye.i love u.kiss u with serious tear for ongoing loss to my kingdom.

 



{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 4

Thursday, November 09, 2006

sunny all day,even weak

 

when i arrived my baby first time avoided me and hide om the back of
the old woman.soon we reunited.for i spent 2 hour in the cafe near his
mother’s home to try blog backup soft,its already 11 am.so we soon
went outside to receive his mother.the door of the school locked so we
wandered outside.we later visited the grocer near the school where i
bought my baby a little bag of fried needle and let him eat.when he
refused to eat i went to the south garden grocer,intending to buy him
a bag of rice biscuit which he liked last time.but the grocer didn’t
at service.we returned and found the door of the school open now so we
entered.my baby disliked to sit on my neck so i shifted him into arms
and found the towel wetted by his mouthwater and freezed and let his
cheek redden.i felt very sorry.so i hastened to enter the classroom
building when we met some colleagues of his mother.one of them even
offer my baby a boiled pachyrhizus,but my baby ate less.after lunch
his mother let me restore her notebook os for the antivirus soft
rising,a domestic product their school bought,didn’t clean her os but
let it slower.my baby refused to sleep even his mother milked him and
tried to let him sleep.after his mother left,he soon slept in my arms
and i laid him on bed after he slept sound.but the old woman now got
up and went to the corridor to sort cabbage and woke my baby up.he
again slept after i held him in arms and i toddled with him in arms
for quite some time.later i laid him down to bed and stayed aside the
bed doubting what i need do in internet cafe.my baby soon woke up and
we played some time on bed.i kissed him a lot.then i held him stride
in the waiting room and sang a lot.just when we reached his mother’s
school’s classroom building we saw his mother.i ate dinner there.
its a nice day with my baby.i proud of my baby and i love him more
than i love myself.i worship him as i worship god,as i worship my
grand father.he is the brightest star in my sky.
bye.i love u.kiss u with shrinked universe of my love.

dogs block my email to post to my blogger.

 

sunny all day,even weak

 

when i arrived my baby first time avoided me and hide om the back of
the old woman.soon we reunited.for i spent 2 hour in the cafe near his
mother’s home to try blog backup soft,its already 11 am.so we soon
went outside to receive his mother.the door of the school locked so we
wandered outside.we later visited the grocer near the school where i
bought my baby a little bag of fried needle and let him eat.when he
refused to eat i went to the south garden grocer,intending to buy him
a bag of rice biscuit which he liked last time.but the grocer didn’t
at service.we returned and found the door of the school open now so we
entered.my baby disliked to sit on my neck so i shifted him into arms
and found the towel wetted by his mouthwater and freezed and let his
cheek redden.i felt very sorry.so i hastened to enter the classroom
building when we met some colleagues of his mother.one of them even
offer my baby a boiled pachyrhizus,but my baby ate less.after lunch
his mother let me restore her notebook os for the antivirus soft
rising,a domestic product their school bought,didn’t clean her os but
let it slower.my baby refused to sleep even his mother milked him and
tried to let him sleep.after his mother left,he soon slept in my arms
and i laid him on bed after he slept sound.but the old woman now got
up and went to the corridor to sort cabbage and woke my baby up.he
again slept after i held him in arms and i toddled with him in arms
for quite some time.later i laid him down to bed and stayed aside the
bed doubting what i need do in internet cafe.my baby soon woke up and
we played some time on bed.i kissed him a lot.then i held him stride
in the waiting room and sang a lot.just when we reached his mother’s
school’s classroom building we saw his mother.i ate dinner there.
its a nice day with my baby.i proud of my baby and i love him more
than i love myself.i worship him as i worship god,as i worship my
grand father.he is the brightest star in my sky.
bye.i love u.kiss u with shrinked universe of my love.

dogs now captured my email to my blogger.they block my email to
benzillar.blogspot.com.

 

sunny all day,even weak

 

when i arrived my baby first time avoided me and hide om the back of
the old woman.soon we reunited.for i spent 2 hour in the cafe near his
mother’s home to try blog backup soft,its already 11 am.so we soon
went outside to receive his mother.the door of the school locked so we
wandered outside.we later visited the grocer near the school where i
bought my baby a little bag of fried needle and let him eat.when he
refused to eat i went to the south garden grocer,intending to buy him
a bag of rice biscuit which he liked last time.but the grocer didn’t
at service.we returned and found the door of the school open now so we
entered.my baby disliked to sit on my neck so i shifted him into arms
and found the towel wetted by his mouthwater and freezed and let his
cheek redden.i felt very sorry.so i hastened to enter the classroom
building when we met some colleagues of his mother.one of them even
offer my baby a boiled pachyrhizus,but my baby ate less.after lunch
his mother let me restore her notebook os for the antivirus soft
rising,a domestic product their school bought,didn’t clean her os but
let it slower.my baby refused to sleep even his mother milked him and
tried to let him sleep.after his mother left,he soon slept in my arms
and i laid him on bed after he slept sound.but the old woman now got
up and went to the corridor to sort cabbage and woke my baby up.he
again slept after i held him in arms and i toddled with him in arms
for quite some time.later i laid him down to bed and stayed aside the
bed doubting what i need do in internet cafe.my baby soon woke up and
we played some time on bed.i kissed him a lot.then i held him stride
in the waiting room and sang a lot.just when we reached his mother’s
school’s classroom building we saw his mother.i ate dinner there.
its a nice day with my baby.i proud of my baby and i love him more
than i love myself.i worship him as i worship god,as i worship my
grand father.he is the brightest star in my sky.
bye.i love u.kiss u with shrinked universe of my love.

 

sunny morning

 

i got up at 8:23 am.last night i dreamed of chenlong(become
dragon),the hongkang kongfu actor,whose son named
fangzuming,interviewed with our a semester including 4 or 5 children
including a white girl and teached by show his acting in movies.then i
got up to urine,its about 6 am and i met a man just leaving the
lavatory and enter his room near the washing room and a man washing in
the washing room.after returned to bed,i dreamed of chenqian(journey
ahead),the once emcee of cctv’s program ‘zhengdazongyi’ and
actor,steered a boat in a lake to fight japanese enemy,liking a common
scene in the PRC’s movie.i don’t know if he is acting or in real in
the dream.after all i felt glad to be blessed to dream.
last night i was heavily hacked and i don’t know what a threat
challenges my posting here.so i decided to use one of my google
group,benzyrnill, to post against unauthorized modifications.
it seems a fine day.i know a link to our neighbor,japan.after all love
is immortality.
bye.i love u.kiss u.only love can save our marriage.no matter how we r
bond with family history, god let us love.that leads peace and
harmony.

btw,in post of ‘unclear morning’ posted on nov. 8 ,’what can soothe
thirst for fresh flesh of girl,what can cure the simplicity of the
universe.’ should be ‘what can soothe thirst for fresh flesh of
girl,what can cure the singularity of the universe.’.i mean the
singularity of universe as described by the famous physical scientist
Stephen Hawking.

 

sunny morning

 

i got up at 8:23 am.last night i dreamed of chenlong(become
dragon),the hongkang kongfu actor,whose son named
fangzuming,interviewed with our a semester including 4 or 5 children
including a white girl and teached by show his acting in movies.then i
got up to urine,its about 6 am and i met a man just leaving the
lavatory and enter his room near the washing room and a man washing in
the washing room.after returned to bed,i dreamed of chenqian(journey
ahead),the once emcee of cctv’s program ‘zhengdazongyi’ and
actor,steered a boat in a lake to fight japanese enemy,liking a common
scene in the PRC’s movie.i don’t know if he is acting or in real in
the dream.after all i felt glad to be blessed to dream.
last night i was heavily hacked and i don’t know what a threat
challenges my posting here.so i decided to use one of my google
group,benzyrnill, to post against unauthorized modifications.
it seems a fine day.i know a link to our neighbor,japan.after all love
is immortality.
bye.i love u.kiss u.only love can save our marriage.no matter how we r
bond with family history, god let us love.that leads peace and
harmony.

btw,in post of ‘unclear morning’ posted on nov. 8 ,’what can soothe
thirst for fresh flesh of girl,what can cure the simplicity of the
universe.’ should be ‘what can soothe thirst for fresh flesh of
girl,what can cure the singularity of the universe.’.i mean the
singularity of universe as described by the famous physical scientist
Stephen Hawking.

dogs block my email to blog to benzillar.blogspot.com.they block my email.

 

sunny morning

 

i got up at 8:23 am.last night i dreamed of chenlong(become
dragon),the hongkang kongfu actor,whose son named
fangzuming,interviewed with our a semester including 4 or 5 children
including a white girl and teached by show his acting in movies.then i
got up to urine,its about 6 am and i met a man just leaving the
lavatory and enter his room near the washing room and a man washing in
the washing room.after returned to bed,i dreamed of chenqian(journey
ahead),the once emcee of cctv’s program ‘zhengdazongyi’ and
actor,steered a boat in a lake to fight japanese enemy,liking a common
scene in the PRC’s movie.i don’t know if he is acting or in real in
the dream.after all i felt glad to be blessed to dream.
last night i was heavily hacked and i don’t know what a threat
challenges my posting here.so i decided to use one of my google
group,benzyrnill, to post against unauthorized modifications.
it seems a fine day.i know a link to our neighbor,japan.after all love
is immortality.
bye.i love u.kiss u.only love can save our marriage.no matter how we r
bond with family history, god let us love.that leads peace and
harmony.

btw,in post of ‘unclear morning’ posted on nov. 8 ,’what can soothe
thirst for fresh flesh of girl,what can cure the simplicity of the
universe.’ should be ‘what can soothe thirst for fresh flesh of
girl,what can cure the singularity of the universe.’.i mean the
singularity of universe as described by the famous physical scientist
Stephen Hawking.

还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

sunny morning

 

i got up at 8:23 am.last night i dreamed of chenlong(become
dragon),the hongkang kongfu actor,whose son named
fangzuming,interviewed with our a semester including 4 or 5 children
including a white girl and teached by show his acting in movies.then i
got up to urine,its about 6 am and i met a man just leaving the
lavatory and enter his room near the washing room and a man washing in
the washing room.after returned to bed,i dreamed of chenqian(journey
ahead),the once emcee of cctv’s program ‘zhengdazongyi’ and
actor,steered a boat in a lake to fight japanese enemy,liking a common
scene in the PRC’s movie.i don’t know if he is acting or in real in
the dream.after all i felt glad to be blessed to dream.
last night i was heavily hacked and i don’t know what a threat
challenges my posting here.so i decided to use one of my google
group,benzyrnill, to post against unauthorized modifications.
it seems a fine day.i know a link to our neighbor,japan.after all love
is immortality.
bye.i love u.kiss u.only love can save our marriage.no matter how we r
bond with family history, god let us love.that leads peace and
harmony.

btw,in post of ‘unclear morning’ posted on nov. 8 ,’what can soothe
thirst for fresh flesh of girl,what can cure the simplicity of the
universe.’ should be ‘what can soothe thirst for fresh flesh of
girl,what can cure the singularity of the universe.’.i mean the
singularity of universe as described by the famous physical scientist
Stephen Hawking.

 

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

snowing most time of the afternoon

 

just when i left the cafe the snow flowing all over the street.however
its not so heavily and in later afternoon it stopped.left the road
whiter and sanitier.i roamed in the room most of the
afternoon,wondering.two neighbor rooms both unlocked when i went to
lavatory for some times.dogs,including the head dog in ur family
name,appeared in my mind to show its fear to let me see his
endeavor.now in the cafe when i tried to backup my blog with softs,it
block my blog at myspace.com and blogger.com as usual,but he also let
the browser ie windows illworking.i had to reset to escape its
evils.some proxies several days ago workable turned invalid now.i know
some guy in ur family name quite evil,like the head dog,like the
3721’s former ceo.all shits.i know u sometimes illwilled but that’s
not the part i want to see and accept.i know u r mine,and u r
kindhearted.the circle of chinese yinyang consisted of 2 parts,and u r
the white part.i know ur family is dominant but u and ur parents
innocent.that’s what i known and i insisted as the condition with
which i can accept u.ur father is a stateman, not a dog.a dog of ur
family name chasing me,and felt assured, but he just a slave,a negro,a
jackal.he doomed to ruin himself and the shabby leaf boat he and his
host stood.that’s the whole story of the man,the name doomed to be
forgot.
bye.i love u.kiss u with pour white.
dogs hacked heavily and i had to reset two times to post.


还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

snowing most time of the afternoon

 

just when i left the cafe the snow flowing all over the street.however
its not so heavily and in later afternoon it stopped.left the road
whiter and sanitier.i roamed in the room most of the
afternoon,wondering.two neighbor rooms both unlocked when i went to
lavatory for some times.dogs,including the head dog in ur family
name,appeared in my mind to show its fear to let me see his
endeavor.now in the cafe when i tried to backup my blog with softs,it
block my blog at myspace.com and blogger.com as usual,but he also let
the browser ie windows illworking.i had to reset to escape its
evils.some proxies several days ago workable turned invalid now.i know
some guy in ur family name quite evil,like the head dog,like the
3721’s former ceo.all shits.i know u sometimes illwilled but that’s
not the part i want to see and accept.i know u r mine,and u r
kindhearted.the circle of chinese yinyang consisted of 2 parts,and u r
the white part.i know ur family is dominant but u and ur parents
innocent.that’s what i known and i insisted as the condition with
which i can accept u.ur father is a stateman, not a dog.a dog of ur
family name chasing me,and felt assured, but he just a slave,a negro,a
jackal.he doomed to ruin himself and the shabby leaf boat he and his
host stood.that’s the whole story of the man,the name doomed to be
forgot.
bye.i love u.kiss u with pour white.

还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

snowing most time of the afternoon

 

just when i left the cafe the snow flowing all over the street.however
its not so heavily and in later afternoon it stopped.left the road
whiter and sanitier.i roamed in the room most of the
afternoon,wondering.two neighbor rooms both unlocked when i went to
lavatory for some times.dogs,including the head dog in ur family
name,appeared in my mind to show its fear to let me see his
endeavor.now in the cafe when i tried to backup my blog with softs,it
block my blog at myspace.com and blogger.com as usual,but he also let
the browser ie windows illworking.i had to reset to escape its
evils.some proxies several days ago workable turned invalid now.i know
some guy in ur family name quite evil,like the head dog,like the
3721’s former ceo.all shits.i know u sometimes illwilled but that’s
not the part i want to see and accept.i know u r mine,and u r
kindhearted.the circle of chinese yinyang consisted of 2 parts,and u r
the white part.i know ur family is dominant but u and ur parents
innocent.that’s what i known and i insisted as the condition with
which i can accept u.ur father is a stateman, not a dog.a dog of ur
family name chasing me,and felt assured, but he just a slave,a negro,a
jackal.he doomed to ruin himself and the shabby leaf boat he and his
host stood.that’s the whole story of the man,the name doomed to be
forgot.
bye.i love u.kiss u with pour white.

 

sunny in the early morning,then turns gloomy

 

i got up at 9:19 am.last night i reviewed a lot and my way and my responsibilty.when i woke up the sunshine tinted my curtain.i didn’t attend the working place i once worked,a kindergarten and a minigarden apart from the dorm zone.after getting up i listened the radio but later some radio channels missing,only left 2 or 3 available in FM wave band area.the ‘voice of china’ missing and the memory function also illworked and can’t memory even i pust it to memorize.i checked my pda for sometimes and then missing in wondering.the weather turned cloudy and the sky was dark.after lunch i arrived here but had to wait for some time for a available pc in the cafe.most of the customers r little students and older boyes playing games.i felt games should be thanked for offering so many entertains to young persons.

dogs biting now.

last night i check my blogs downloaded to my pda and found many unauthorized modifications to my original posts.dogs union felt they can manipulate anything in guise.i first felt surer on myspace but now i found my blog on it also modified to distort my word and message.they never block myspace.com but blocked blogger.com and blogspot.com.they traced all my account activity and broke any time to modify to obscure my message.they r the biggest thief and the most disgusting shadow gay.

bye.i love u.kiss u with limpidity.

 

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

first snow finally dripped,even last no long

 

when i left the cafe in the morning the snow waving on the street.its so prosperous.when i arrived my baby just woke up by my unlocking door and he immediately asked for my caress.in the morning i so far felt so solitude and my baby warmed and relieved me with his kindness and understanding.soon his mother arrived and we had lunch at once.his mother shown especial caring for him and again left me in relief.my baby also especially cute and cordial.he entertained us both with his eating and shitting.after lunch we prepared to shot pictures outside and i suggested in the ground garden just below the building her home located.its plain but the shrub and bushes prosperous.we met some familiars of his mother and his mother urged us to return soon.so we returned.then i busy with sorting the pictures and movies while his mother milked him and let him slept.later the department director of my once working place buzzed in and asked for talk with an offer of some gift money for journalist day tomorrow at same time.i kissed my baby in dream and left.in the office the dep. director inquired about my situation and asked for me to take part in working time.i admitted it and returned to the dorm.then i sensed my love and forgive for some girls in my life,including fang(square),lu and u,zhou.the qrrser planting cypresses in the garden where they laid down large trees.some worker stayed in front of my window and dirty willed,so i went to dinner.i felt something interacted with me and puting me into a new setting.bye.i love u.kiss u with white of snow.

From the Son in th…

 

first snow finally dripped,even last no long

 

when i left the cafe in the morning the snow waving on the street.its so prosperous.when i arrived my baby just woke up by my unlocking door and he immediately asked for my caress.in the morning i so far felt so solitude and my baby warmed and relieved me with his kindness and understanding.soon his mother arrived and we had lunch at once.his mother shown especial caring for him and again left me in relief.my baby also especially cute and cordial.he entertained us both with his eating and shitting.after lunch we prepared to shot pictures outside and i suggested in the ground garden just below the building her home located.its plain but the shrub and bushes prosperous.we met some familiars of his mother and his mother urged us to return soon.so we returned.then i busy with sorting the pictures and movies while his mother milked him and let him slept.later the department director of my once working place buzzed in and asked for talk with an offer of some gift money for journalist day tomorrow at same time.i kissed my baby in dream and left.in the office the dep. director inquired about my situation and asked for me to take part in working time.i admitted it and returned to the dorm.then i sensed my love and forgive for some girls in my life,including fang(square),lu and u,zhou.the qrrser planting cypresses in the garden where they laid down large trees.some worker stayed in front of my window and dirty willed,so i went to dinner.i felt something interacted with me and puting me into a new setting.bye.i love u.kiss u with white of snow.<table style=”width: auto;”><tbody><tr><td><a href=”http://picasaweb.google.com/dabbog/TheSonInTheFirstSnowOfHisSecondWinterOnEarth/photo#4994573424853254162 “><img src=”http://lh6.google.com/dabbog/RVBKEUj8ABI/AAAAAAAAAUI/_A_TcOyMiNk/s288/20061170003.JPG“></a></td></tr><tr><td style=”font-family: arial,sans-serif; font-size: 66%; text-align: right;”>From <a href=”http://picasaweb.google.com/dabbog/TheSonInTheFirstSnowOfHisSecondWinterOnEarth“>the Son in th…</a></td></tr></tbody></table>

 

the Son in the first snow of his second winter on earth

 

its first snow in the extroardinary warm winter in qiqihar,northeast of china.

 

unclear morning.

 

i got up at 9:08 am.last night dogs’ biting strangely lost its most
power and left weak part on my body indifferet any direction.i stayed
awake lately,and review my breaking-heart love with the girl likely in
family name of fang(square) when she was a sophermore in nankai unv.
and when i prepared my master degree entrance exam there.i never
regret for my deep love to her but in the dawn today i felt its her
fault and weak not to offer her trust and responsiblity to our
flashing love.and i blame all girls passed by me just left me a clue
of their fondness and emptiness and single so far. for them don’t love
indeed.they love cozy life to avoid facing loneliness and cold dark in
human life and human knowledge in universe.i felt i thought with my
own truth i encountered in quite some harsh moments including my broke
down in nankai unv.. love is the most cherished gift of god, but
loneliness was the truth of routine life.i felt only i can live with
loneliness will i live with my pride and glory of my own.i needn’t
god’s attending, god’s know my suffering in the end.he or she also
endures loneliness.what can soothe thirst for fresh flesh of girl,what
can cure the simplicity of the universe.i also got a glimpse to all my
baby’s mother’s attitude to me and my possible attitude to the
world,near and far,a change to attest myself.i want to change in a
pulse but i calmed to obey the silence and null rule.in doubt i
heading to my baby’s mother’s home and i decked a internet cafe here
half way to enjoy my interest group here.if i afford,i can live in
indifferece.if i ever love, i bleed to laugh.gaps may there, i don’t
know if i will take a new stance.
bye.i love u.kiss u with sight.


还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

Monday, November 06, 2006

sunny day mostly.

 

i laid myself on bed listening music radio all the afternoon.dogs
biting from all directions,forcing me to change my poise
frequently.last night they let me restless through this way and force
me to defense.later i got up to urine and when i returned i heard some
beautiful music consoled me for my anxious on ur company with me.after
dinner i arrived here the cafe farer from the dorm zone and again
being bited heavily.but that forced me to concentrate on reading a
google group entitled ‘mind’s eye’ which very informative.i got a
glimpse to the smart people of human and enchanted by the dilemma of
intelligence.i known by instinct its a good forum but till today i
started to read it.
bye,i fighted to curb my expenditure on the web.i budget to spend 2
yuan a day on internet.
i love u.kiss u.hope u a nice day.

 

almost cloudy except sometimes faint sunshine

 

i got up at 8:54 am.last night i went to bed after 10:30 pm but the
neighbor hooligan kept crowing and spying and biting lately.at first i
just let it go for convinient but later i settled to defense
myself.nothing special when i fell into sleep.
now the sunshine outside of the door is brighter.i just busy with
downloading some stuff for my pda.last night my account in myspace.com
was err-prone and can open.but now its open.i really felt much obliged
for myspace crew,for they r so promptly to recover my home there every
time.i m surer my account being hacked for times.its also my first
blog outside of china.even i can’t find time to browse for friends
there but i did find my beloved there,jamie even she refused to let me
love here.this morning and last night she appeared in my mind eyes for
some time.i hope still she can offer me a chance to know her.
bye.i love u.kiss u.


还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

Sunday, November 05, 2006

almost full sunny day.

 

after posted in yiyou(righteous friend,but it left me quite poor
impression when last time all front seats occupied and i haunted inner
seat but traced by a man liked a bodyguard when i glimpsed into a room
when there majiang players likely gambling),i decided to see my baby
son for the sunshine so loveable.when i arrived my baby was in sleep
and so was the old woman.the sound i unlocked the door woke my baby up
and i holding him to play then.soon the son of his mother’s aunt
arrived and my baby played him own.so i started to sort my sd card of
my pda.l finished it after 3 am,spending 2 more hours,and i held my
baby out to receive his mother.the sunshine turned weak.we entered the
school now that the side door was open.my baby stepped on heaps of
yellow leaves and smiled.later i held him to south garden to buy a bag
of rice biscuit as he shown interest on the ditched bag of food among
the leaves.we almost spent an hour in the winds and really felt the
power of winter chill.when we again approached the teaching building
of the school his mother catched us up from our back.she had returned
to home.she complained i let my baby’s ears reddened for chill.she
started to tutor a girl student and the son of her aunt.i continued
restoration of her notebook till the old woman held my baby approached
me again.then i shut down the pc and played with my baby.the
atmosphere was dirty and i had to turn on tv to watch woman volleyball
but my baby soon turned off the tv.the girl student soon left but the
son of the aunt kept asking question to my baby’s mother and i had to
break in to have dinner.the son of the aunt had dinner there but i
found the rice ran short.i felt the dirty atmosphere was from the
son,whose name including peng in chinese consisted of two moons and
when i recognized it he finished his dinner and left.i played with my
baby with his mother awhile then i left and docked here to write to u.
its not so bad a day after all.i felt now i m surer that i can cope
the dirty wills from the surrounding and even surer god’s will to let
me through after all these projecting from the common persons in the
common society setting.
bye.i love u.like sands on beach,tiny while mounted to mountain
number.kiss u with brightness.

 

brightest morning in early winter.

 

so god didn’t offer me a snow in my anticipation but a bright morning
instead.i got of at 8:45 am and waited awhile for my pda charging.then
i went to to sort my pda to avoid spying eye around in the dorm and
even so it was hanged for 2 times and flash card wrecked a time.i
walked in the sunshine in the treeyard in the dorm zone awhile till
lunch time.my radio newly found beijing’s radio titled ‘voice of
china’ which now live talk about Mout.huang of anhui prov.,eastcentual
china.the authority desperately to broadcast its crying for attention
to save his problem.it also broadcast ‘voice of huaxia’ and another
‘voice’ of somewhat.yesterday they gathered heads of africa to leak
its troubled water.
last night i dreamed accompanied with a middle aged man,an
enterprineur likely againing his first basin of gold from his being
secretary of china youth league when in college.he made a product
conbining cell phone,tv and some gadget now evades me,imported idea
from foreign western world.he boast his human resource expertise to
handle 2 of his staff,all from their graduate to be skilled.when he
picked me to return to home, we saw two moons in the sky and i left
his car and watched the 2 moons on the ground while he left.
last night dogs bited me lately.the islamic africa part gathering in
beijing these day also pested me.however,i felt into sleep and sound
till morning.i felt assured about my soundness when i saw the
sunshine.
i have it.god and my kindom.i love u.kiss u with sunshine.bye.dogs
biting in the cafe.

 

Saturday, November 04, 2006

dark day

 

i got up at 8:11am.last night dogs bited lately and let me had to went
to lavatory room to shit after 3 or 4 am.when i went there i met a
girl leaving in the corridor.i had the full day indoor with my baby
except a break for showering in common bathroom where i was alone in
the room to shower.in the morning the ground was somewhat
wet,indicating last night was dirty around me and i was cleaned by the
frizzle.my baby’s mother allowed to leave home after 9 am so we
gathered awhile.i cared my baby playing until he slept on my shoulders
near 11 am.when i felt can’t bear i shifted to hug him to let him
sleep.he woke up near 11:30 am and peacefully sat on my laptop to
watch tv.its rare for him for he always likes to play around.at lunch
he ate less and played around the table for some time.his grandmom
also there.after lunch i shown his mother i works on settling her
accounts on youtube and played alone on the web after she left and
slept.i soon fed up with slow speed of surf experience and found my
baby peacefully in his grandmom’s arms to play.so i left to
shower.when i returned i met his mother leaving for shower.i held my
baby playing in the rest of afternoon.when his mother returned we
played with him together and let him laugh a lot.i left till i felt
gloomy on my odyssey for my second marriage.
the starsea cafe locked my pc just after some minutes after i login to
my google and i burst to the short girl who always troubled my usage
of pc here.
bye. days and nights i fighted for u,i don’t know what a course i m in
but i forever stay.
i love u.kiss u.
tonight likely to snow as i gladly predicated several days ago.its
would be uncomparable blessing.

 



{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 3

Friday, November 03, 2006

pale day.

 

last night i spent almost 4 or 5 hours in a internet cafe to customize
my youtube account.in the dawn i returned to the dorm after machine
dogs heavily hacked the net and let all proxy i can find blocked.i can
access my blogger account.i tried several pc and likely all pcs within
the cafe under the monitor of machine dogs.a more wider possiblity is
that all chinese internet cafe under cops’ spy.china no doubt a socity
under tightened surveillance of the dictator,but i didn’t know its
scope and depth.
i got up after 12 am.and laid on bed till 4 pm.then i went to starsea
cafe again to finished my work rest.the blogger still can’t be
accessed.i had to wait.
i more and more enjoy the cyber life,living history based on the
warehouse of the .com service.but the chinese dog just lagged behind.
bye.i love u.kiss u with dusts.

 

Thursday, November 02, 2006

faint sunshine in the morning,paled out in the afternoon.

 

last night i worked lately to 9:40 pm.i even attempted to continue my
work after i exchanged daily bless with my son and his mother.but i
held back myself for i want to share free time with my baby and his
mother next morning.his mother said she would be free this morning,and
last morning she held my baby to eat out kentuky fried chicken.i more
or less enjoy publicity with my son.so i regret didn’t go over
yesterday.
this morning i woke up at 8:01 am and got up at once.last night the
boss of the starsea cafe haunted in my mind for quite some time.when i
left he upstairs to meet me and i know he monitored me for a long
time.they belongs to dogs union.
my baby received me near the door.soon his mother suggested to haunt
outside and we went to south garden and we started to shot our
baby.some old parents holding their grandsons there showing their
admires to us and my son’s mother shared my baby’s biscuits with them
but i didn’t.for i promised my baby not to disperse his food with
anyone.
in the afternoon the railway telcom arrived 2 staff, a man and a woman
last time visited us to handle our adsl installation,upon our
complains for the too low speed of adsl.they just shown me the adsl
modem’s interface to show its downward speed is 2m,but didn’t resolve
our problem of slow surfing.i later doubting the woman staff a
intelligence worker of the state security bureau.the man blamed my
firewall and even suggest me surfing without firewall.after them
left,i spent 2 more hours to upload a 200KB video files to youtube.com
but failed thousand times.my baby slept on my shoulder in advanced and
later let the old woman shifted to bed.i held my baby to receive his
mother after 6:30 pm and had a nice time in the entrance of the
classroom building of the school.
i spent 2 hours here to register my family members youtube accounts
and let them working.
bye.i love u with bareness.kiss u with drips of winter leaves.

From warren with h…

 

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

indoor modifying my googlepages all afternoon.

 

i spent all afternoon in the starcafe to modify my googlepage at
http://benzillar.googlepages.com .dog’s blocking some resource quite
irrigating but i finsihed it.at noon i felt quite unease about my
spending last night(in the middle the pc hacked and reboot and lost
all my works after half and an hour,so i spent another hour to
suppliment it) and today exceed my budget. but i admitted its my need
and god sees my effort to discipline.i will stayed in the dorm all the
evening,not spending a coin here.i like google,if i can do something
to satisfy myself i would do it with google.
bye.i love u.kiss u with teeth and tease.

 

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

bright warm sunny day

 

my baby received me near the door when i arrived there about 10:00am.i
held him playing for half an hour then went out to receive his
mother.we picked the way to sportsyard and he asked for walking on the
newly heaped earth on the path around the yard on feet.there r 3 or 4
children with their parents there.my baby picked a ditched sore milk
cup so i suggested buying one.then we went to tongxin supermarket
where we bought a cup of sore milk,a bag of fried fish wings and
little bag of sausage.we ate immediately outside of the market.then we
entered the south garden where swarmed with aged people.we had a good
time in the sunshine.when i caught sight of some teachers leaving
through the door of his mother’s school i hastened there but still his
mother had to turned back from home to fetch us.after lunch i played
awhile his mother’s notebook then we triple went outside.we
accompanied his mother to her school and we went to south garden.i
started to shot my baby.he played on the leaves on ground
concentrately but later insisted to hang the camera and bumped a lot
on the paveway,let me very anxious.he asked for some snack from the
grocer in the garden.when we shifted to sports yard after eating a ice
stick he slept on my shoulder.the old woman laid him on bed and i
started to play with the notebook and the web.the dogs again hacked
the notebook and the antivirus and antispyware and firewall again
broken by the dog,who mostly likely manipulated the telcom to hack our
byte flow,but also possible my os let them faults to break in.its just
too fast.they r more and more desperate to brag their weapons and
brutality.they r losing,just like their doomed fate.
tonight the cafe full of dogs,heavily biting.last night dog among them
let the pc err prone and hanged and reboot itself.dogs union really
losing.they just can’t keep their fake peace.fake pretense.god let me
see the breaking light near the end of the tunnel.
bye.i love u.kiss u with pure white of the coming first snow of the
killing winter.

my baby son in the extraordinary warm winter day

 

 

milky warm morning sunshine

 

i woke up at 7:35 am and got up at 8:33.last night i was bited and had
to cop with them awhile and felt pity for myself for god let me
experience this shit.i know all this kind of experience just to let me
be more steadily unbendablely demand a fundamental change to china,to
the shit arrogant persons now.i like my own play,like my baby always
seeking playing with stuff around him,but we r constantly interrupted
by dogs,for they can’t support themselves peacefully,they need a beat
to know themselves,to boost their performance.
days and nights let us speechless.silent u let me load too much
burdon,i need ur encouragement,i need ur tender.but u kept
clueless.maybe dogs hinder u,maybe my linger in my existence hinder
u,but i want u know my heart always open for u.my life seemed
peaceful,but i yell for a refreshment.i stare at the sky,i search the
sea of web,i need u bring me another chance.
bye.i love u.kiss u with flavor.

 

Monday, October 30, 2006

extraordinary warm sunny winter day.

 

i woke up at 7:22 am and got up at 8:00 am.last night dogs let me
restless awhile and i sometime can’t judge in dream or in reality.i
dreamed my elder brother and a country folk broke my house and the
latter attempting to steal something.i headed to see my baby at
once.my baby received me near the door on foot,likely he usually
played alone when at home with the old woman.i held him playing on the
balcony but later i was distracted by the wish to settle his mother’s
notebook.last night i download free firewall and antivirus soft and i
just need a try.my baby let me alone for quite some time but sometimes
he drag my hand to lead me away from the notebook.i evade him for
sometimes.after 10:30 he cried loudly for my cares and i gave up pc
and held him outside and he fell into sleep as soon as we downstairs
to ground floor.he slept on my shoulders in the south garden and again
some people asked us to return home and soon my baby was woke up by
illwilled people around and we shifted to his mother’s school where we
received his mother.at home before lunch my baby laughed a lot with
hide-and-see with his mother.but soon after lunch i busy with notebook
till 4:30 pm i held him out to receive his mother and he again slept
just left his mother’s home.he is now growing up and under trainning
by god.god let illwilled persons around our home desperate to exert on
him.but he forever safe and sound.
on the way leaving his mother’s home i felt sorry for him.i should
caress him more,for i come over rightly to see him.his mother not so
interested in my work for her.
bye.days and nights let us love blunt.i don’t know how far u ahead
me.i only know fight myself a safe cave for the unclear ur presence.i
only know god’s seeing my chores.
i love u.kiss u with the purity of the coming first snow.


还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

Sunday, October 29, 2006

bright sunshine afternoon

 

i laid myself on bed listening music radio till 4 pm.dogs hunting and
let my pda hanged a time.after 4 pm i got up and want to read
newspaper but the newspaper room out of service.so i took a tour to
the eatern zone of qrrs which underwent large changes under the
ambitions of qrrs and the municipal gov. .there r some open space
around the qrrs hotel for receiving its foreign and national
guests,which covered with grass and a few trees enclosed by
fence.nearby middle school had a new teaching building.leaving its old
2 floor building extending some area likely being occupied by
management stuff.qrrs even build 3 building of 15 floor or higher but
their ground floor mostly locked now,indicating can’t be rent for
service.the state-owned enterprises owning quite some assets not eager
to open to service but hold for a good price.it can be safely said
nowaday china’s biggest asset was the land of peasants that been
deprived from its owner.i also tried to find another internet cafe but
in vain.maybe the customer can’t afford another,or maybe the cops
monopolied to maxize its profits.
bye.i want to read my google personal homepage,which was block when i
surfed at starsea cafe in the morning.i love u.kiss u with clouds in
the pale blue winter sky.

 

warm and bright morning

 

i got up at 10:09 am.awake on bed i doubting the irriatabel spying and
hacking on our family internet accounts from dogs.it likes a long time
tiptoe in shits stained ground ,likes a smoke gun aside u without any
restrain.dogs here in starsea again block most of my access to some
websites.they shits on chinese mainland for so many years that anyone
passed here can’t avoid to be choked by the foul smells.they r dirty
animal.i also doubting who trusted the cafe to ask for a show of id
card to use internet,who privileged to ask anyone to show their id
card when they at service.is is lawful when we enjoy services like
shopping or walking or eating while had to show our id card?its
longtime a laughable compare that american have a unique social
welfare id card while chinese have a unique national id card for the
convinience of cops to trace criminal.they drive any chinese into
criminal with their disgusting dog eyes and licking dirty tougoe.
however,the sunshine outside of the window is bright.last night dogs
around my room in the dorm heavily biting when i read pc magzines.i
have to read bible to clean myself and trench the foxes and wolfes and
dogs.they likely desperate or new hungerer or new evil spirit arrived
near my room.
i slept sound,thx god.
bye.i’d better do some reading on web.i love u.kiss u with tearless blue sky.


还我河山

你在清贫中呆得太久了
你分不清月色的石子和清癯的星
眸子的星芒浮于薄霭
厌倦的兽眼阴雨中低低沉吼

 

Saturday, October 28, 2006

another pale sunshine,cool but bright

 

i got up at 8:25 am and headed to my baby’s mother’s home
immediately.my baby’s mother was said going to have her self-test exam
for secondary bachelor majoring chinese literature.my baby received me
near the door and refused my attempting to kiss his leg.i held him to
let him play what he liked,usually homehold materails or cooking
utilities.the old woman had some complains about my baby messing her
works.near 11 his mother returned.she want to go to shower for she
missed it last week for too busy.but our baby just refused to sleep.so
we ate lunch.his mother then went to shower.just when his mother
complained my kicking little thing to make cracks to let my baby agile
, my baby felt to sleep on my shoulders.so she left and i started to
play with her notebook on the internet.the dogs heavily hacked me and
i had to suffer a lot of time waiting for the pc and the net to
response.later the son of my baby’s mother’s aunt arrived and i
started to gave up net and played with my baby.at 3:00 pm i held him
outside to wait his mother return.my baby directed me to enter his
mother’s school even the door was locked.but 2 cars leaving and let us
enter by the way.my baby kicked a lot of dusts on the sport yard and
felt happy.soon his mother found us and we left.then i went to
bath.after returning i started to fix his mother’s heavily infected
notebook.i ate dinner there.and now i m here.
dog’s hamper me to download google free software pack now.in my baby’s
mother’s home they also block my downloading norton av included in the
pack.witht the installed part of the pack 160 more infected files
found.shits.
bye.i need some time to read my google homepage.i love u.kiss u with bright.

 

Friday, October 27, 2006

pale sunshine afternoon

 

i spent 2 yuan in the morning and doubting not to haunt here in the night.but my pda hinted me that much reading without thinking will loose mind.so i felt a play on the web can be helpful for me.in the afternoon i went to listening beijing opera practise in workers’ palace of qrrs.the chinese gong and drum really doming,it reminds me that traditional chinese old parents can be really harmful to their offsprings.in addition in beijing opera man sing in the role of woman also a strange phenomeno in world opera.a man in disgusting manner did that and left some musicians emptied their seats.i also in the idle to want check my pda for the meaning of vain and void.i did it after the man left and a man in high pitch to sing.after a young woman practised i left after 2 musicains left.i went to the libary of qrrs to borrowed 3 copies of pc magzines.then i went to the newspaper room to read ‘chankaoxiaoxi'(world reference digest).the woman libarian insisted on standing near me to do her work,she and a man facing me on the other side of the table let me unconfortable.i read magzines in the dorm till dinner time.there r quite some girls including tall girls let me relived.i attempted to buzz my parents in my hometown but they r absent on the other side of the line.

bye.i love u.kiss u with dry lavendor.i want to do some reading within my google reader.bye.

 

sunshined as usual.

 

i got up at 9:25 am.last night i continued to read the works of zhutianwen,a taiwan novelist.her readings to ‘A Dream of Red Mansions (hongloumeng) .she is in fact quite far-sighted on society of china and the perspective of china. of course, she didn’t think  she can make a reality on her own. in her early years she was under influence of hulancheng, the scholar worked for wnagjingwei, the coworker of japanese authority once in china deeply. his father in faith to christian. i m glad to see and hear another patriot under my family name.
i can surf the internet via a fake name in a farer cafe and let me more or less relief.one of my subscription of google groups discussing china intending adopting real name blog and regard it a backward in web history.i agree with him.china spare no effort to learn after south korea.i don’t know much about south koreal but as to real name everywhere its stupid. to cure a unfair society need  deeper insight to its structure but not with a expediance.chinese media always boast the inconvinience of new trival social
bubbles to urge mindless chinese people (they can’t be mindless now that all around them r filtered messages,faked messages) hand in more supervision to the hand of authority,esp, cops. i think its lazy and intended by power interest group.i hated it.democracy demand liberal minds.sound mind must to be independent.
bye.i love u.kiss u with my warmth in love with u.

 

Thursday, October 26, 2006

pale sunny day,however its winter now

 

i got up about 8:47 am.i dreamed of the former german chancellor,Gerhard Schröder ,visited china and i asked him some questionS in english.he crossed the crowd and talked to me his puzzle about the setting on the path likely set by cops.i dreamed i had to tiptoed not to stain my trousers for shits all round the ground.so i knew gays around.

my google and blogger almost blocked. i don’t know when i can blog freely from now.internet cafes now demand showing ur national id card published by cops, liking probating criminals.hope the dark day been sunshined soon.

bye.kiss u.i love u with temders.

 

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

bright afternoon

 

after returned to the dorm i wandered awhile then went to the libary of qrrs to borrow some pc magzines.the libarian limited me 2 copy,one copy less than previous,and i took it for granted now that the dogs biting everywhere.they more and more losing all their power to keep peace within china and losing temper not to bite everywhere,that’s reasonable.i read one of the magzine in room till almost dinner time.then i listened to radio to refresh.after dinner i wentt to starsea again and again they demand id card,this time with a man likely its boss asked for id card first.i left without a word.they likely hacked my baby’s mother’s blog again,for its logo again ill working even i checked it well before i left at noon.

nothing special,the long winter awaiting dogs to play around indoor,now that their host can’t find anything more meanful.they doomed to focus their poor sights more and more onto pin in dustbin.that’s their potential.

bye.i love u as usual.like star in the dry winter nights.kiss u with cool.

 

sunny afternoon

 

i got up at about 8:48 am.the morning spent on bed listening to music and review the book of ‘be friend with god’.i felt there is a god of buddism of female,of vain,and there is a god in bible which demand owning and loyalty.
qrrs,my once working place,now laid down 2 large old tree but 4.the cafe of starsea demand a id card to use internet.who can i say about it?
now im in another cafe and likely surrounded by dogs(cops).they modified my baby’s mother’s blog and let its logo missing.i had to spent half an hour to correct it.shits stained china,foul its land and its people’s mind.
bye.i want to obey 2 yuan a day.kiss u. i love u.

 

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

pale sunshine

 

yesterday i read a lot of ‘be friend with god’ and found myself missing.in the night i laid it off and doubting its holy message that to be is quicker than to think to be or to do.then i felt the world i encountered before my 3 times falling into asylum sieged me.but i m surer that’s my being,my being as Man’s Son to survived myself like wild beast,fight for mates with teeth and paws.and the harsh rule to judge myself with the world i took and offer earthly.the situation i viewed for more than one time,and i know its not kidding.i can’t live with love for all human,like god in buddism or in the book of ‘communication with god’,rather,i chose my god as christian,stern and demanding obey.i lived with rule,with oath and base,i only love my being,my own being,my owning and being.i love my family,like love myself,for only by this i know i m son of god.discipline and simple,that’s the way i follow my god.i can judge nobody but my fellows,my family member.i love them with my loving method.in the night i restless and even want to go to the asylum and stay there for refuge.fate justfied me merciless and i just felt left so lonely in dark,i brewing for help but i can’t ask for.then in a rush i pick the quilt of my baby and headed to my baby’s mother’s home after 11 pm,i guess.i slept there sound.in the morning my baby cried for my cares woke me up.i cared him playing all the morning till 11 am we went outside to receive his mother.his mother seemingly glad.but at noon after lunch she asked me to stay in the dorm.i admitted.i held my baby outside toddling for about half and an hour then we returned.on the entrance of the building a road cleaner frequently acquainted us sat aside the road and i let him picked some candy i bought for my baby but my baby felt wrongdid onto him and cried in anger.then i promised i wouldn’t did it forever.
qrrs,my once working place,offered me 200 yuan as holidays’ bonus.i suggested my baby’s mother leaving me 100 yuan for my expense on internet for my baby likely won’t let me use pc there but she prefered to store for needs.i admitted.the project of renovating the tree yard of the dorm zone still underwent and they laid down 2 big and old trees and let me cursed at once in my heart.sure they r beast,or insect,but now that i myself love the living and spirit of beast so i won’t comment more.battle field among human and beast and evil and alien not alien in games, i think i can see it in real.
bye.i love u.i know u r interacting with me.kiss u with moist.

 

Monday, October 23, 2006

milk morning sunshine

 

i got up at 8:22 am.last night i dreamed a lot and being probed a lot.penetrating eyes let me open my eyes in dark for sometimes.i dream i with my wife living on the highest floor,our reef, like my old house in my hometown,covered by tile,leaking all over a lot of rain to our house,wet our bed and floor.a team of drain worker repaired in the neighbor house.i let my wife to leave to eat something first.when i attempt to leave,the team enter my house from window.so l wait to let them repair.then my old father appeared in my home.my wife seemed not happy with him.then i played glass ball with some kids of my hometown and won them three 2 times.a young doctor of my hometown named zhuhongshu(grand technology) chatted with me and let me have some medicine to assist my recovery.my mother also in the dream,but i now forget what she did.most vivid was the rain pouring from the reef to our home,to our bed and floor.my baby seemingly also in the dream weak and let my wife burning and me sorry.when i woke up i felt i had to write it down on my blog.and i m eager to urine.
so its a working day.i probablely will go over to see if my baby’s mother’s adsl working.last night i read awhile ‘be friend with god’ and really relieved by god’s grace and open love.i felt its the process of breaking barrier.i look forward to my living with soul and freedom.
bye.i love u.kiss u.

 

Sunday, October 22, 2006

sunny but windy and cold.

 

i woke up at 7:03 am and got up at 9:03 am.i headed to see my baby at once.my baby was sleeping when i arrived,so i left to register my kid brother’s adsl service shift to our phone.yesterday afternoon i was hindered by the demand to hand in a copy of my id card.when i returned,my baby playing in the waiting room.i picked him and laid him on my shoulders and let him played indoor till her mother returned. i lunch,the old woman distracted me sometimes and my baby asked for my accompany with him to see or fetch him something by dragging my hand.his mother also glorified by his charms and glad.i told her i had now 2 blond friends on web,but she didn’t comment.after lunch she soon started to receive her pupils at home.i let my baby playing around them.the telcom told me my registery had to wait work day to hand over to workers to handle,so i can’t do anything on web.so i left even the sunshine very bright outside of the window.i consoled myself that we have it in our hearts and have not need to bath it every times when it shine our eyes.when i left my baby was breast by his mother and he waved to me to farewell.
in the dorm i charged my pda.i laid myself on bed silently.i dozed awhile till felt cold.i rambled mindly in the peering eyes around.lately i listened to the radio.loving songs sometimes touched me and i know our reunite at our will.changing days and nights left me in changing mood,god save my love,save my restless longing for u.
bye.kiss u.i love u with torn heart.

 

Saturday, October 21, 2006

a dry day after a wet dream last night.

 

when i emitted i dreamed a baby or my baby,god blesses him.this the second time when i wet dreamed with him.last time was in the asylum after a nerd man with a damaged hand showing exaggrate friendship to me and soon left the asylum with his relatives which is strange for the asylum usually kept their lamb long enough to let them never want to return,who name is ghost(gui).even last night i read ‘be friend with god’ in which i was told any unexpected happenings r all ur unnoticed intension and u r responsible for all the world around u,but i still surer that the stained wet dream mostly appeared under the exertion of surrounding ill wills against my baby and me.my relation with my baby under my deep soul on which i felt sure about and also sure about ours being under god’s attending,but dog’s spying eyes kept penetrating.i fight against it for a long time but recently i was told by holy message that i should let my bady respond independently,let soul cares over them.so i just get rid of dog’s biting as soon as possible,let it go as soon as possible.so maybe i loosed my rein not to let being hit.
after all its a nice day today.i ate breakfast at home of my baby’s mother.she fancied to capture my baby with her camera,and bring the shots with her notebook,likely upload to her gallery.i m glad to see her enjoying the cyberspace.after her departed for her school i held my baby outside.dogs let my baby recently so quite unconfortable that he seemingly crabbed to cry more.seemingly they almost saw their wane.qrrs,the work place i once in,operated on the concrete ground in the dorm yard,and today they laid a red papers on each well to underground drain within the ground they tore apart.they overturn the pave way aside the grass.they have machine,and their machinery head.they believed in their machinery head.
after lunch my baby’s mother launch to try to make use of the rest of adsl service my kid brother’s wife left.i maybe then surfed more at my baby’s mother’s home in the coming days.
bye.i love u.in shindy and agitation.kiss u with drip of tears in dream.
my baby’s mother’s works today.

dogged day but still with warmth

 

 

Friday, October 20, 2006

sunny day.

 

after lunch i haunted the newspaper room of qrrs.an old man sat aside me leaned to me,leting me disgusted.but i kept on reading.i read pictorial magzines.after i finished reading and head outside to refresh,an old man followed me,probably the same man of the reading room.seems qrrs or qiqihar can’t grow anything beside this kind of shits.i looked at the surface of the lake or pool in front of qrrs.the water is shollow,and i know the dusts grows quick,for my room took days to have to be moped.the factory generated a lot of black dusts.then i returned to the dorm.some machines gathered in the dorm yard breaking the concrete ground.i started to charge my pda.i listened my radio lately.
dogs in the cafe rampant and started to bite me as soon as i settled.now they deceded.but im likely timed out.today i intended to spent 2 yuan on internet.
bye.kiss u with warmth.i love u.

 

faint sunshine in the morning.

 

i woke up at 8:23 am and got up at 10:33 am.i dreamed a lot in dawn.i dreamed of qrrs,the work place i once worked and its dorm i now lived in,busy with decorating floats preparing for some gatherings.i dreamed my dream was broke by the visiting of my roommate seldom returned.i saw a rat in my dream.i got up and turning my radio and its was a boring program titled net music bar,but in fact its show of 2 woman who can manipultae their voice to mimic differet accents,most of their mimic just the ugly reality of nowaday china or the northeast china: cliech,violence,distorted sex or love.this morning they quote a news reporting a male collegian mimic Marilyn Menroe with nuked and posted in bbs.they mimic boring news reporter in the guise of authority and illwilled peeking eyes.that just mirror the surrounding dark souls around me,like neighbors in the dorm and in the cafe.i doubting my restraining to curb my expenditure on internet and till felt better to shift myself into the sunshine outside.i rambled awhile in the opening along the main street u left in sunshine outside of the starsea cafe till i felt eager to see my webcam.
bye.i m timed out.i love u.kiss u.

还我河山

 

Thursday, October 19, 2006

morning sunshine like lamb

 

i got up at 8:29 am.last night i slept a little bit late,for trying wallop let the pc in the cafe hanged some times and let me stayed there.after i returned to the dorm its already 11:00 pm.in the morning after i got up i headed to visit my baby.i lingered in the cafe near my baby’s mother’s home an hour to adding visiting counter to her blogger .my baby received me near the door.he immediately asked for haunting outside.we wandered outside for half and an hour till seeing his mother returning.we played in the south garden where he chased after yellow leaves on the ground.a tall young mother led her boy and playing hide-and-see and attacted my baby awhile,but he soon immersed in his own play.in the grocer near his mother’s school,i teased the daughter a lot and she kicked me.she can’t do anything other to show her failure.after returned i busy to test building a mobile office on udisk with taango but daunted by registering online.my baby soon slept after being breast.his mother shown her anger with me for i didn’t eat lunch on time.in the mid i left home to download some soft in need and being bited heavily in the cafe.after i return the old woman asked for leave to buy grocery and my baby miserablely cried for my caress when i attempted to finish my work on pc.finally i gave up and held my baby out.we peeked the large house with tree yard and sorrounded by brick wall from the gate door hole and let my baby sat on the wall standing on a bench near the wall.my baby very glad to sat on the wall and loath to left.i bought him a ball candy in the garden grocer and returned.i tried to play with him before my leaving.he felt and played with me for some time.i let him playing on the balcony and let the old woman seeing him and i left in silence.i don’t know if he will cry when he found my absence.on the way the feeling let me low.
after dinner i checked my spb finance on my pda.the passed 3 month in dorm i overran my budget less than 100 yuan monthly.my salary card left 100 yuan or more.that’s all my cash at hand for my living.last month i spent 80 yuan or more on internet but the half of this month i had spent 120 and more yaun on it.
bye.i likely timed out.kiss u with tears from heaven.i love u,near and far.

 

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

ccoudy in the morning,sunny in the afternoon

 

i woke up at 8:23 am and got up at 10:21 am.in the dawn i dreamed elablorating the notion of vain(wu in chinese) of buddism with my alumni,chenxinjian and wujiang.the foremer worked as a staff of the personel bureau of shenzhen and the later some times ago worked as a scholar in US.then in the dorm of nankai unv. i graduated,i played with wujiang and chenjiancai,an alumnus later shifted himself to another school of nakai.after getting up i waited for my pda being charged.after lunch i haunted the cafe to customize my baby’s mother’s blog.last night quite some website i frequently accessed can’t be connected to,like blogger,blogcn.com,sunrain.net and others,likely something underwent.today the cafe didn’t require paper registry and i can access those site as usually.last night i read a computer magzine a bit lately and felt dogs biting.after 2 hours here i returned to the garden within the dorm to rest.i sat on the bench and gazed the sun.after sunset i wander around the garden till near dinner time.in afternoon i got an orkut account and was attracted by it at once.
dog’s biting now.two males aound me just there dirty willed.
bye.i love u,like sunray.kiss u with bright.

 

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

a full sunny day.

 

i woke up at 8:03 am and headed to my baby’s mother’s home immediately.i strived to constrain my desire to surf the web and seeing my baby first.when i arrived,my baby sleeping.i slept aside him on the bedroom till he woke up.he cried awhile after woke up then started to play on his own under my attendance.when its 10:30 am i held him outside to receive his mother’s return from her school.we picked the path to the sportsyard first and there a large crowd of students or worker of surveying and drawing working there.my baby played and slided to one of their team but was blocked temperarily by a tall strong man but later we passed it by.then i held my baby pay the rest room of old cadres near the sportsyard.there r 3 rooms within.a room for reading magzines and newspapers.the middle room for the administration,the side room near the yard for chess and card playing.in the chess room an old man likely the worker stopped our dwelling.then we passed the old large house of the highest cadre of the area and bought my baby a bag of peanuts and a bottle of water.on the way to south garden my baby picked to play slding board in a residentail zone.the south garden swarmed with aged people,the fountain was dried and covered with tent and my baby walked on the tightened tent.then i bought him an ice stick in the garden grocery shop.we ate the stick till in the school of his mother.quite some students trained there,likely grade one students.they recently frequently trained there in the afternoon.when my baby step onto the sports yard they retreated to the concrete ball sports yard.we played for quite some time.when we attempted to leave,his mother catched up us and let my baby make water.then she pushed us leaving.my baby cried for her milk and cired till felt into sleep at home after near half of an hour.i held him sleeping for almost an hour and lately shift to the old woman to lay him on the bed and i started to copy some home video to udisk for uploading to my web account.i ate dinner there.
thats our happy day.i felt quite complacent.
the cops demanded to register id number onto the paper sheet in the cafe from today.really shitting.they worthless to be cursed.they fouled the all country till their bankrupt and collapse.every sound person liked to see the day.and quite some website can’t accessed.shits everywhere and the world in china likes a dustbin.
bye.i love u.kiss u with tears for the downfall of chinese.
by the way the picture on my homepage of google from nasa really wonderful.so i linked it here.

 

Monday, October 16, 2006

sunshines sometimes in the afternoon

 

i spent 3 hours in the afternoon in the cafe.first 2 customized my homepage soon after lunch.latter spent on trying google’s bookmarks and posting via email.in the mid i stayed in the dorm awhile and observing the flashing sunshine.then i went to qrrs’ libary to borrow some computer magzines.the gatekeepers in cop’s uniform checked my staff id carefully.later the librarian told me some team visisted here.returned to the dorm i skimed awhile but seemed not so attractive as the web.at noon i can’t help my gladness to buzz my baby’s mother on her feeling on her blog i set for her.but she told me she unavailable in the morning.these days i definitely spent too time on web than what i can afford.but i think its my investment,my investment on google and my virtual presence in cyberspace.i m of no regret.i hope i can stay and enjoy the nest i prepared on google for myself aftermath.wilder animals,landscapes,news,music,stuffed my homepage,awaiting my eyesighting.
i m likely to time out.kiss u.i love u with peace.bye.

 

rainning morning

 

however its late autumn.the rain likely foretell the arrival of winter.i woke up at 9:03 am and got up at 9:33 am.last night dogs bited lately and i determined to let them barking.i don’t know when i slept, but i remember later dream.i brought a magzine with me with our alumni to visit peking unv.,there i lost my team and toddled alone.i then took a minibus and asked a woman taker who to get peking unv.,she let me get of the bus right the stop in a haste.then i was in a crowd siheyuan and some old women told me to crawl on the zigzag narrow tunnel to outlet,for the mordern buildings occupied most of the open space and main road,shortcuts left in narrow tunnels.heard this when i crawling and climbing the narrow steep path to opening,i gave up and woke up.after woke up i found bogs still biting.i started to clip feet nails then.the rain let me relieved and cosy now in the cafe.rain let people trenched and find their own being and peace.
bye.i need customize my homepage now.kiss u with dew,like the rain in dawn.i love u.

 



{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 2

Sunday, October 15, 2006

a busy day with google in bright day.

 

in the morning i register my baby another goole account and left the cafe near 12 am.when i arrived my baby’s mother’s home they r having lunch,including the old woman and her mother.i ate with them.after lunch my baby’s mother suggested my bringing baby sunshine outside.he lingered before a bike repairer’s stall and refused to leave and asked for some thing i don’t know.so i let him leave.near the fried chieken shop a tall girl with marvelous figure attracted us and we stayed there till her left.then i complained it to my baby,saying i don’t know how to deal with such a good thing.my baby then asked for ice stick and a bag of fried shrimp and a bottle of water.we headed to the south garden where we first met 2 little girl,one of them with a pair of large bright eyes.i let them play my pda but my baby loathed to let them play.a strong man near blow piccolo.we played around him awhile.then my baby played with dirty water in the shallow of ground lamps,he even put his finger stained with the dirty water into my mouth.another tall young mother haunted around.in the only conversation i praised her figure but she didn’t repliy.we pick the path through sportsyard to return.the cops team trained there .
after returned i went to shower.then i played awhile pc.with the cool stool and biting dogs around my bottock painful when i left.i ate dinner in the canteen and let the female administrator watch my baby’s photos on my pda as i promised her.
more than an hour spent on customise my baby’s mother’s group.
bye.i felt quite placated with my works.kiss u.

 

limp sunshine morning

 

i got up at 9:35 am.last night i slept late.the neighbor hooligans kept chuckling and rattling lately.my grand old father from my distant hometown brought me into dream then.i dreamed my mother let my kid brother sleep with him in the house on a high land on steep slope.that settled me,for i think my kid brother likely in missing of his target.later a girl daughter of a general active in my dream.after getting up i head the path to my baby’s mother’s home and i picked a cafe in half way to blog.my home at myspac.com seeing its first guest,madison,and i spent some time replying her.what a chant.
for its late.i’d better to see my baby right now.bye.kiss u.i love u.

 

Saturday, October 14, 2006

bright day,busy with adding webcam

 

in the afternoon i can’t help eagering to register my baby an google account.i really enjoy google.the night busy with adding wildlife webcam to my google homepage,but hard to find available webcam of bear or leopard.qrrs,my once working place, set a party for the young staff in the dorm,with floating polar near the gate,and cracks and fireworks.i ate my dinner silently in a temporary room.today i spent 4 hour in the morning,3 hours in the afternoon and 2 hour in the night in cafes.i rearranged my google’s homepage so as to let the contents categoried.now its likely almost settled.dogs biting,and my fix time ran out soon.
bye.i love u.kiss u.

 

soft bright morning sunshine

 

i woke up at 7:23 am and got up at 7:53 am.last night i went to bed on time but likely in dream i felt keeping awake while don’t fatigued.i first dreamed in a attic with glass roof,we couple,with my wife in pregnance,with other 2 families shared the same room,all on bed while the pouring rain leaking in stream from the roof on the floor.then i felt had to relieve the urine which made me sleepless.so i got up and found dawn paled the curtain.returned from the toilet i met a guy with a cap on his head peaking the tv room facing my door.i in fact now don’t know my visiting toilet real or in dream.then on bed i continued dreaming the dorm administrators entered and left,and i just slept.then then interrupted me to let me know i shitted on the bed under my body and foul the whole building.and i know a crowd outside of the door peeking.i looked and really i shitted on bed.before these two dreams i dreamed another dream but it now evaded me.after woke up i missed jamie,who changed her picuture to show her maturity.these days i sometimes skimmed ‘be friend with god’ and so encouraged to trust god that i sometimes just had to lay it aside to let the feeling of plenty to stay.
last night i buzzed my baby’s mother and she agree my visiting my baby tomorrow.he is the brightest star in my silver velvet sky.we r all son of god.he enchanted me so much,and enhenced me so good.now from the holy message from ‘be friend with god’,i know the best trust is trust needless,to let urself absolutely independent.i indeed trust my baby in deep heart,i just can’t help loving him so smotheringly.
bye.dear.i now in a cafe far from starsea but within the zone of qrrs.i love u with settlement,with trust.kiss u with dear.

 

Friday, October 13, 2006

most of the day gloomy.

 

i arrived my baby’s home after 11:00 am.he was not so eager for my caress.i kiss his leg first as usual.then he asked for haunting outside but i hindered him for its cold outside.then he played with the clock.soon his mother returned.she now seems not so spoilt by my presence.she holding baby to kick me and let my baby laugh a lot.after lunch i boast the convinience of google and suggested to register her an account.she admitted so i intended to leave with her together.but our baby cried upon our leave so i stayed at home to care my baby.later i held my baby outside.we visited the sportsyard,passing the grocery shops my baby didn’t ask for juice.we passed a working team busy implimenting fiber wire underground and my baby interested in the hole to the underground.then we entered the south garden and chatted with the woman grocer.i bought my baby a cup of jelly.for the old woman urged not to let my baby eat anything to stain his thick clothings,i let my baby suck the straw instead of his prefered way to drink from the rim of the cup.he walked on the mall on the yellow leave for quite some time and find pleasure.when it started to sunshine weakly i brought him home and left when he cried for my leaving.i went to the nearby cafe to register an google account for his mother and finished all setting within her account.it cost me half and 2 hours.the cafe was almost full,and a cop attempted to sat aside me but i changed a seat immediately.after finished it in the cafe i returned to see if my baby’s mother returned but was told she was due to have night lesson and would returned before 7:00 pm.so i wrote to let my baby’s mother know the account detail and handed to the old woman.then my baby in sleet woke up and the old woman waved him to continue sleep.i waited he calmed down and left.
in the dorm canteen an female administrator talked about my baby and i attempted to show her my baby’s photos but found my pda ran out of battary.but when i took it out of its suitcase it was turned on and showing screen even i didn’t powered it.
heavily being bited here.a fat man aside me left half way.
bye.in the passed 2 days the cafe i m in now,starsea,charged me unfairly when i adopted the way to pay when leave.so i changed back to fix hour usage.i love u.kiss u with warm heart.

 

gloomy morning.

 

i woke up at 7:30 am and got up at 8:47 am.last night i slept on time and dreamed a lot.in a dream i likely in a rest room of traveling place like railway station or something likes,and worry my shoes.then in a room of VIPs,a man likely party secretary declared an bribery of a guy named zhu jiulong(nine dragon),or sounds alike,accounted to 1.9 billions.then some buy checked my radio and found 2 gold coins under its button worthed of 2 thousands.after getting up i head here,a cafe near my baby’s mother’s home immediately.the sky is pale and unclear,but on the corner turning to the path to my baby’s mother’s home i saw my shaddown on the ground on my bike.now it started to shine.i felt it will sunshine in the afternoon.
now i had 3 friends in gtalk to chat.even sometimes i doubting if i can afford it.
bye.my dear.i love u in beam.its now beams outside of the glass door of the cafe.kiss u with hot.

 

Thursday, October 12, 2006

in fact the sky is blue in daytime

 

in the afternoon i spent about an hour in the sunshine on the bench after returned from the cafe.then i returned to the cafe to modify my youtube account.in the rest of time i roamed in the garden till the sun fell down to the skyline of the reef of the opposing dorm.i worried my budget but i still think i m sufficed to do what in need and in want.after dinner here i tried gtalkprofile.com to find some firends to talk with with gtalk.now i settled and won 2 approvals.the road tends to be opener ahead.
i also subscribed some rss feed within google reader.i like science reports.i really enjoy the web.
u r likely under presure of finding a job duely.i bewith u the goodwill for our fortune in this land,in our kingdom to reclaim.i don’t know where is my village to settle but u r my outpost.i endured in tunnel so far but i walked through so many death match mine and i doomed to see the opening space.god,god in grace see my tumble and my righteousness.
bye.i love u.today i spent whole day alone,abiding my baby’s mother’s asking.i hope i can hear his mother buzzing me tonight to let me know if i can see my baby tomorrow.kiss u with sole miss.

 

peaceful sunny morning.

 

last night i read the new borrowed computer magzines from qrrs lately and finished the three.the neighbor hooligans whistled and cracked to urge me laying myself down but i did according my own schedule after 0:30 am.god descended to me and i felt safe to rest in peace and i did indeed.i think god’s leading me through after these days’ being bited.i really have nothing to worry,my baby in shrine,my kingdom in thriving, my people in shiving, only the stealer in charge now shiveling.its dogs losing their paws, its spies dosing wilderings.they strived to break the links among my baby and his mother and me,but we all intact.we don’t stay togather to love,but love togather to stay.its another milky late autumn morning, i was left freely to enjoy the free web service.i like it, and just need some time to familar with it.busy or free, times and times i saw god.
bye.i spent more than an hours here in the starsea cafe,customize my blog.hope u enjoy my home here.i love u.like the pure white in the sunshine.kiss u with whitewashed pale sky.

 

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

sunny day

 

i let my baby played with water awhile indoor and felt the animosity of the old woman.at 11:00 am i brought my baby out to receive his mother.but he disliked the way to the school and we truned to the sports yard where some students likely from a school of survey and draw.they appeared yesterday.i chatted with a tall girl among them.they had 2 girl both tall.i also peeked the telescope.but my baby strongly refused to see through it.there r 2 aged playing roll(tuoluo).when we approached them a large black dog with its woman host passed over.my baby insisted to follow the dog but they entered a room aside the yard.when i again want to see clear the another tall girl of the school my baby refused and i also felt the hostility from the body.then we played swing near the basket ball yard where the school settled.my baby started to be irregular and they let him fall down with a long stick my baby picked from ground in his hand ,but my baby kept intact.then we left and after passed the narrow door in the steel grid seperating the yard from the residential building when i attempted to tighten my belt,my baby itched and fell topdown onto my back and i catched him with only a hand onto his only leg on my shoulder.that can be said the most dangerous situation i ever encountered when i broght my baby outside.my baby usually sat well on my neck with his hands touching me.so no doubt the sorrounding hostile beasts irritated him.i looked back but can’t assure who threatened.my baby cried awhile and insisted returning through the door in the grid to the sportsyard and left the yard through its far side rolling door.i bought him a bag of candy in the grocer within the garden and missed his mother who left in advance.when we stood inside the door of the school,her mother returned from home and obviously angery.she demanded me to leave after lunch and angerer to my claims that dogs pested us.i also felt i’d better rest in the afternoon.so i left.my baby waved to me when i left.that let me more relieved.
on the bed in the dorm i soon felt into sleep,let my soul guarding my baby.dogs today likely crazy.but all what they can do is barking upon the wrong tree.
bye.an hour spent on adding music to my gmail.i love u,in heaven on earth.kiss u with bees and birds.

 

the autumn sunshine lingering.

 

i woke up at 6:55 am and got up at 7:13 am.last night i felt very hungery and being bited just after i went to bed heavily.i trenched them in the dustbin and i saw it uncovered in the morning in the corridor.its unusual in the passed days in which i got up late after 9:00 am is routine.i also had my breakfast so unusually that the administrator of the canteen claimed didn’t seeing me for some time.then i went to the starsea cafe but most of it was cleaning and the clerks loathed to receive customers.what i can say is that dogs always bankrupt quality of service.then i picked my bike and heading here,a cafe entitled ‘information supermarket’,near my baby’s mother’s home.i had beeing trying google’s video service and registered an account in youtube.com which was just claimed by google.i really enjoys the new stuff from the web.
bye.i m to see my baby.his mother asked me not to come yesterday but i think now that the weather so nice and so precious i should come with my baby.i love u,without any reservation.kiss u with budding.

 

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

sunny in the afternoon

 

after lunch i stayed in the dorm and strode.till 1:30 pm i started to read and immediately encouraged to see my baby now that the sunshine so bright.when i arrived the old woman had held my baby out,so i copied the video i shot yesterday to my udisk intendingly to upload to myspace.com.then i went to fetch my bayb,and i found them in the south garden on the square.an chorus consisted mostly of aged women and frequently sang songs granting mothership singing there and 3 girl students in front of my baby and soon left after caught sight of me.my baby in a cap and very cute.i immediately caressed him and the old woman asked for leave.my baby played awhile on the tablet and asked for food.the grocer suggested chokolate at a price of 1 yuan.we bought.the woman started to tease my baby,so i suggested to pay back the juice another grocer lent us yesterday.my baby admitted and we bought an ice stick and a bottle of water there.my baby now understood a lot of talks we had and frequently hum to reply me in points.after played awhile on the sportsyard and the sunshine darkened we returned.at home he laughed a lot with hide and see behind the curtain of the balcony in sunshine.i accompanied him playing till 4:30 am and then we went outside to receive his mother returning from her school.the watch dog of the school approached us 2 or 3 times to hinder us entering the school and we left with disgusts.then we near again the grocery whose daughter familiar with us and now lured us to buy her fried sausage.i tried to block my baby’s request for his mother not let me buing food on street but gave up upon my baby’s cries.the we triple united and heading home.i ate dinner there and returned.
almost 2 hours spent on html grammar practise trying to customize my profile on myspace.com.its really troublesome on allowing html code.it frequently errored when the code works well in blogger.com.
bye.i love u in stary sky in late autumn night.hope u allowed me to enjoy my personal peace life with my old family when u still refused to lend me ur hands.
some more pictures shot yesterday.i don’t want to waste them.

the Son review the autumn sunshine

Jan 2, 2005 – 4 Photos

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

 

cloudy winter monring arrived.

 

its windy and cold.my sleep was broke by the entering of the dorm admin to install a new lamp to replace the illworking one.last night my baby’s mother buzzed after 9:00 pm to let me know some person of the working place i once worked want to know if we divorced.their real aim was to urge our register of our divorce.my baby’s mother lied,saying our id card not at hand.when i told her her needn’t to lie,she lost her temper and demand me not to see my baby or a time a week.i know she suffered.
bye.

 

Monday, October 09, 2006

returns the autumn sunshine

 

i got up lately after 9:00 am.i waited my pda to charge till 11:33 am.then i headed to my baby’s home.the wife and son of my kid brother,who himself had worked in guangdong prov.,southern china for months,scheduled to leave for their reunion tonight.the son left at home while the mother left.after lunch my baby’s mother suggested to bring our baby outside.i doubting the son of my brother recently showing rebellion and likely hard to let him follow us so i agreed to leave him home with the old woman.my son’s mother left to her school directly and left me with my baby.my baby now quite some times irrelevant to grocers nearby but he insisted haunting one with a steep ladder to its window after passed some grocers.just after i chose a bottle i found i didn’t bring money with me for changing suit into working clothes.my baby cried to protest.then we passed again a grocer we haunted a lot except recently.we entered and found the daughter and the woman boss all there.the daughter teased a lot with us but they lent us a bottle of juice.my baby holding the cap in his hand as usual and drank 2 or 3 times.the rest was poured into the fountain of the south garden.we played on the tablet,and the sunshine lured me to shot and i did.most dwellers r aged except a girl with fit jean played with her nephew.i followed her some time and exchanged some words with her.then the disgusting old woman with her grand daughter in family name of liu,harrassed us many times,approached us and talked to us herself,letting me coughed 3 times and spoilt some candy the grocer in the garden lent us.after visiting the sports yard by the way we returned.i then busy with sorting shots but my baby asked for my caress for quite some times and even cried miserabely.the wife of my brother and the grandmom of my baby arrived soon.i then busy with searching for missing sd card of the camera.i konw my baby first played with it but usually he didn’t hide it.so i blamed the son of my brother,who replied always ‘mela(lost)’ upon my asking if he caught sight of it.his mother didn’t scorned him but i felt very anger to him.then the mother of my baby returned and got irritated with me as soon as i told the card missing.she kicked me and demanded me leaving.so i left.the kid sister of my baby’s mother summoned a banquet before their leaving tonight.
so that our day in the sunshine.i was being bited since my beseat.after all i felt placated with my shottings.my son’s mother condamned my publishing my baby’s shot but i just can’t help doing it.i just felt the pecular and precious of my baby’s shot in his infantile.
bye.i love u,not matter how i was spilt by the naughty boy of a woman of the same family name of ur.kiss u with hot.

the Son review the autumn sunshine

Jan 2, 2005 – 10 Photos

 

Sunday, October 08, 2006

sunshined after we entered the sports yard.

 

the morning really a bit chill.so after i arrived my baby’s mother’s home i had to stay at home with him at first.but soon he insisted to outside.i first tried to console him by let him in the corridor of the 7th floor.but he gradully let me holding him outside of the building.i m with a shirt and he also wore thin.we moved to the sports yard and he insisted watching the tennis yard.then i felt we had to eat something to drive coldness away now that he refused my suggestion to back to fetch some clothings.we bought a package of peanuts.i fed him with mouth.then he liked to play the sliding board in a residential area.the a little boy and his father arrived.the boy directly wanted to partake the sliding, my baby then started to shiver and i holding him return quickly.after lunch,we brought our baby outside,his mother went to her school and i tried to capture my baby in the beginning of winter.by the way,today is the winter chill day according to lunar calendar.he let me bought him a bottle of juice and played with the cap immediately.we entered the garden and i started to shot.after shoting we played with the bottle for some time.after we moved to the sports yard he played with sand aside the yard awhile and asked to play with the camera.when we moved to the center of the sports yard it sunshined.i felt glad and shot more pictures onto my baby.then we returned.after the old woman returned from dispatching dustbin,i started to sort photos,with an ear listening my baby’s crying upon his sleep the woman urged.i soon after my baby laid on bed sleeping finished my work and left after kissing him in dream.i really love him.
in the dorm i read awhile jixianlin’s auatobiography till dinner.then here i dealt with friend invitation within myspace.com.
bye.today my pda quote love message needs rewarmth like oil needed to keep lamp.these days i busy with setting up my google account,and logging my days,i really don’t know how i can talk to u,with ur heart in my heart.day by day, the life stream floating us apart and more apart,what i can do in my view is to let u know my life,let u know me,on the contrast to ur refusal to let me know u.i know i m likely burning into smoke,but what the meaning of striving to burn last now that what u interested is sidewatching and rating.
i love u.kiss u with windy bushes sheltering flower garden.
here is the shot of today.

the Son before the winter

Oct 5, 2006 – 12 Photos

 

first pale winter morning sticks out its head.

 

the sun can only be seen from open area and unclear without obvious clouds.after seeing it i more or less reliefed for i had thought it a cloudy day when i open my window.i got up at 7:56 am and immediately felt sorry for myself as well as for my baby son.last night i was heavily bited in dorm when i washing my feet and let it sank in hot water aside my bed.when i went out to spilt water,founding a tall pal stood in the door of tv room facing my door.biting dog not only from him but also from neighbor rooms and upstairs.i finished reading to the biography of jixianlin and skim the biography of german chancellor Angela Merkel.when the music from radio finished,i went to sleep.
on the way i doubting if i should see my baby first,but i really miss here the web to miss u,to share with u.and i think with my peace my baby can benefits.so i be here,with u in mind,with the world in front,with god in testimony.
bye.i m to see my baby,after i skimmed the news content i subscribed via google.i love u,in hard time and in soft time.kiss u with pale sky’s pearl,the sun.

 

Saturday, October 07, 2006

cold winter just over there

 

i arrived my baby’s home almost at lunch.then i launched to register the security soft his mother’s notebook adopted with sn from the web.after lunch i busy with modifying logo for my blogs.my son’s grandmom and her elder sister brought him and his cousin outside sunshine.my baby’s mother tutoring.after i finished she urged me to see my baby in south garden.so i headed there.my baby glad to see me and immediately led me hold him apart from them,the grandmom,etc.he asked for ball candy and let a lot of mouth water on my hairs.after we returned to home,i found something challenging.i blamed the son of my baby’s grandmom’s kid sister,who there to be tutored but at the moment idle.but my baby’s mother unease with his cousin,who later spoilt the coca onto the ground and hide himself in the corner.i then also almost sure he counted to the dirty wills floating in the room.i then sat down to wondering my kid brother,why he left his family here,and his wife in family name zhou as u,why she left her son here and left.then the little boy asked for shitting,i held him to the lavatory and picked a towl paper aside when his mother returned and found us.then i left to the dorm.i continued reading on the biography of jixianlin till dinner.first time my feet in shoes felt cold in the room.
today u r likely returning to ur school.what i can say its that i hope god brought us closer in the holiday.day but day i roamed among my blogs just in the aim to catch u face to face,and lead ur hand to me forth.god knows how fragile the balance i had now is.
bye.kiss u with the dropping of yellow leaves.i love u in patience.patience is the another name of fortitude.i pray for u by praying to god.

 

windy morning even in sunshine.

 

i got up at 10:08 am.last night i read the biography of jixianlin,the countable human art scholar survived the new republic.he studied the history of buddism and really in the companion of god.his beloved in germany when he studied there kept single all her life,and the 2 woman accompany him in china cared his full life when he started his career in china republic.
last night i complained my google account only offer chinese content even i set my account as from a us’,likely hampered by chinese watchdog,then this morning here i found again english content options and added some.thx god.
bye.i m here a cafe near my baby’s mother’s home.its near lunch time.i m to see my baby.kiss u.l love u.

 

Friday, October 06, 2006

a day of full sunshine, a day of middle autumn day.

 

dogs,likely 2 middle aged male in their 30s’, heavily biting here now paralleling with me aparted by the corridor.a girl facing near a seat.flies stood and flied over my head.dim light covered half the the second floor of starsea cafe.that’s the place i chosed after wandering about half an hour outside under the autumn sky.i don’t know if its common for cafe,or just ruined by the hand of dogs,which likely manipulated most of the internet cafes in china.
today i got up early at 8:01 am and headed to see my baby as soon as the charging pda ready.my son’s mother want to show my pda to her students refered by their textbook.i installed ms device emmulator on her notebook to simulating pda screen.then we started to haunt outside.his mother went to her shool and we played in the south garden.not so many children there,but we chose 2 baby girls with their grandmom and grandpa.one quick at learn and another domineering.my baby on my neck.when we leaving we met a tall and slim man from germany.we chatted awhile,while my baby constantly let his bottle onto the ground and let the man pick it for him.later the german fed up and claimed not to pick it any more.later on the way home as soon as reviewing it i can’t help laughing.but he and might before him those parents there accompanying their children,let my baby’s running nose running over to his mouth.till we parted the german and passed by the grocer and bought ball candy the grocer let me known.we returned home some minutes before his mother,who later claimed her lecture a success.
after lunch i went to common bathroom.when i returned my baby slept.his mother started to tutor her 2 stucents,including a new one,the son of the only doctor of her school.she bought my son a suit of sports clothings as the fee,but when she met us on the ground she said that’s her gift for our baby.i left after her 2 girl students arrived.my baby then had played awhile on my neck with a tube of eye ointment of his mother’s and mess a lot on my shirt.he farewelled to me gladly.
so its our happy middle autumn’s day.last night i called to my parents in my hometown.my second elder sister and the son of the third elder sister,and my eldest brother and his son there.i felt glad to chat with the son of my sister and told him no matter how he endures the striving contest among his classmates,which is cliche in nowaday china,he should be at ease for he always under god’s care.i tried to talk with my grand father but barely understood what he said.i just told him i want him to stay in the world for more years till i visit him with my new wife,and the old family,esp.my baby son with whom my mother asked for many times.they said my father got mind unclear for quite some time,but i believed in him as usual.he is my hero and my god.
bye.i love u.like sunflower in autumn wind.kiss u with beverage in aging mouth.

 

Thursday, October 05, 2006

a day of swizzling sunshine.

 

i arrived my baby’s mother’s home at about 11:00 am and start to sorted her dv.after lunch,we set out with our baby to shot the wonderful day.my baby played on the yard of the school his mother worked for and just let me alone doing shotting.all can’t be more nicer.when my baby needed to mop the dust on the ground to shift dirty wills from around,his mother insisted to leave the place and i suggested to south garden nearby.just after entered the garden my baby turned to irregular and i suggested to buy him some food.so we went to the grocer and bought him a bottle of juice.a woman likely the wife of the director charging the garden leaving the grocer and chatted with my baby’s mother on her daughter’s study which under my baby’s mother’s supervision.then we started to shot again.the sun ray is strong,so the cheap dv his mother had can capture the moment when we push the bottom,otherwise it loathes to shut its shutter for insufficient income rays resulting ghosts.so i learned to capture the motive moment of my baby.some of them list below:

happy national day

Oct 5, 2006 – 15 Photos

dogs and bugs,that’s routine when i read my pda after retuned and sat on the bench in the garden.
bye.i love u.like sunshine and like beshone.kiss u with straw from autumn rice field.

 

perfect sunny morning,in my memory the longest autumn

 

i woke up at 8:55 am and got up at 9:35.last night i dreamed some unpleasant things and i know even in dream u can be disturbed.i headed to my baby’s mother’s home immediately and lingered in a cafe in the way near the house.i tried my 2 photo blog of google with one i didn’t settled last night.the sunshine is really brilliant outside of the door and i felt i can’t linger here much time to waste it.
as a by-product of search u via web i enjoyed virtual id in cyberspace,just as i envisioned when i was kept in asylum this time last year.at that time my confidence was hurt and i thought i can only do what i can do,let my baby under his mother’s care,with which i had been so worried that i broke down before entering the asylum.what i can do was to blog and log my routine as testimony for my soundness.now i applied it in fact.at the time when in asylum i promised my baby’s mother if she treated me and my visiting relatives,including my elder sister and kid brother’s family, well and i will never sue divorce as petitioner.till now my baby’s mother had sued 2 times for divorce but herself gave up.i had to and abled to let her felt safe to live independently.
in a word,i really felt in god’s guide and placated.no more no less i can spend time and money on the web.
bye.i love u with tears dreed after so many ready beauties around but apart from me.kiss u with berry in teeth.

 

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

wonderful sunny afternoon.

 

its about 11:20 am when i arrived my baby’s mother’s home.his mother at home.she later in the afternoon asked me why i recently visited my baby a time a day, i replied that the sun so nice that i can’t spoil it.after lunch i sort her dv and shifted shots to her notebook and backed some to my sd card so as to upload to the web.then i tried to capture more of us with our baby.when its almost time for her to her school we held our son to sportsyard to shot pictures.after my baby asked for ice stick and i bought him one she left in anger.i then let my baby played in the yard in her school till the watch dog interrupted.then we moved to south garden where we played awhile near the fountain.and my baby asked for his second ice stick and a bottle of cock,and a ball candy.when he ate his ball candy on the rim of the fountain while i chatted with a little girl in family name of sun,the neighbor in family name of liu,harrassed us for quite some times,holding her granddaughter approached us and attempted to talk to my son,that just spoilt my baby son’s candy into the fountain and we left after the girl,sun.we again returned to his mother’s school waiting for the exam finished.crowd of students finished their test left around us.i noticed some of the girl students quite beautiful.after we met his mother and returned to home with her two pupils,i left to the dorm.
i read awhie the bible on the bench in sunshine in the garden,till i felt rest in the sunshine more helpful to the spirit.so i watched sky till dinner time.and as soon as finished dinner i went to the front yard of the cafe,starsea,wandering in the sunset to rapt in serenity.
an hour passed in trying blogger’s photo post function.
bye.dear,i know i own beauties without extending hands,but only u can fill the emptiness after my lust for girl’s flesh.i looked forward to the day i unwrap u in dear in eager.i love u,under the same sky of days and nights.kiss u with sweatings.

benalbum

Oct 4, 2006 – 6 Photos

 

milky sunlight in the morning.

 

i got up at 9:54 am.and headed here,another cafe between the dorm and the home of my baby.i just registered http://benzyrnill.blogspot.com .i just too much love blogger.com and can’t let any one register my blog title.
my home at myspace recently errs several times likely being hacked.but god let the wonderful staff of the company of myspace.com restored it swiftly.thx all,thx god.
its the fourth day of the national holiday,isn’t it?i forgot all date in the days and nights to set my home in cyberspace more hospitable.i may treat it like a business,as regard its the speedest and cheapest way to testify my being.hope u can see me
bye.i likely no more urgent to bliss.i love u.kiss u with warmth of late autumn sunshine.

 

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

really nice day

 

i arrived my baby’s mother’s home at lunch time.so i ate lunch there.after lunch i played awhile with him and his mother aside,feeding our baby with a kind of tasty grapes his mother’s school offered as national day’s bonus.then i did some modification to logos on his mother’s notebook.then we went outside with his mother heading for her school.the sun can’t be more bright.his mother warned if i let my baby eat ice stick she will kill both of us.but we ate 2 in the afternoon.we played in his mother’s school awhile,to which later his mother claimed she watched from her office and felt glad our baby played so glad there.she was there monitoring monthly exams.my baby walked on the heaps of dropped leaves and played with the dustbin.i washed his hands with bottle water.then we went to south garden,where he practised to climb the steps of the tablet.then he walked independently to the mini play zone,where he laughed a lot when played with sliding board.dogs and bugs there around but we really entertained.when we left the grocer within the garden told me my son’s mother had searched for us,so we headed home.on the way an old also told his mother’s search.so i speeded up to return,but my son directed me to slide to a round way till picked again the way passing the old to return home.her mother tutoring the 2 girl students at home.also there her mother and the son of her mother’s kid sister.i always glad to see young ladies and sang and recited chinese traditional peoms a lot.my baby insisted to let me care him when his grandma wanted to caress him.i left when seemingly his mother’s kis sister will arrived and arranged a second dinner out since last unpleasant dinner out several days ago i reported here.
in dorm zone,i read the bible on bench in the garden outside of the dorm but dogged biting.i kept reading till dinner time.after dinner i roamed under the clear sky and pink sunset, spirit let me breathe freely and freshly.
these days i haunted my baby’s mother’s home more frequent. but in every second u r doming in my heart.my day wasted in watch u in silence remotely in fact.around the core of ur back to me,i prepared so intently.
bye.kiss u.i love u with sunny sky.

 

bright sunny morning

 

a bright sunny morning.its beam on the curtain from the start raises me on bed.i got up at 9:47 am.and headed here,a cafe in the way between the dorm and my baby’s mother’s home,named xinlongyu(new dragon universe),to register my favored email account.

last night i went to bed earlier among these days,at about 9 pm.but i reviewed a lot.before going to bed i read bible awhile,so i was in the shine of the spirit.i reviewed the troubled persons around me bugging me,and settled in staying in god’s dome.

bye.its really a nice morning,for the sun rays,for the peaceful night passed.these days i talked less,one reason is that i busy with signup new accounts and customise blog,the other reason is evading bugging and dogging.the third is that i settled more time to care u,rather than my bubbles.god says words let u less sense love in heart to heart,i love u in peace in serenity.

kiss u with blossom.i love u.

 

Monday, October 02, 2006

sunny afternnon interupted by cloud

 

most time spend on customise.morning in baishi(hundred century) let me surer that most customers of internet cafe haunted there just to dirty will.i intended to tell u my dream in the dawn but gave up.nowaday seemingly everyone understand to sexually exert on others by will.
this afternoon i spent in my baby’s mother’s home.i busy with modifying my logos for my blog and my business.the son and wife of my kid brother,who worked in guangdong province after visited me with his family and left his family here,were also there.i busy with computer,likely spoilt their lunch for its more or less a ceremony dinner but i left them all aside.the wife of my kid sister left first for her stall,then others brought the two children outside to sunshine.then i continued to backup to cd after a haste lunch,till them returned.then my baby slept on bed and his mother tutored 2 girl stucents.i watched my baby in his dream awhile.soon the return of his cousin and the old woman woke him up.i then strode in the waiting room with my baby on my neck and sang.that’s all a nice afteroon with my beloved.
after dinner i read awhile ‘be friend with god’,from the same author of the ‘communication with god’ series.dogs illwilled around,urge my leaving.i left till its dark and to here.
bye.hope u happy holiday,baby.hold dear with my bless.i love u.

 

mild sun in the morning

 

i got up at 9:47 am.last night i worked lately after 2 am online to register my favored userid in google and yahoo,and customized my blog at blogcn.com.till now i almost finished it.
bugs biting now.
bye.hope u a nice holiday.love u with sunlight.

 

Sunday, October 01, 2006

sunny in the morning,cloudy afternoon

 

baby,here i m.last night the dorm was very dim when i returned there,seemingly quite some of the dweller headed to their hometown.i read <communication with god 3> lately till finished it.neighbor hooligan played even i ate some grapes brought from my baby’s mother’s home and its very sweat.i also drank some beer when felt lonely.this morning i got up lately and immediately went to sunshine in the garden till lunch time.in the afternoon i busy with design a logo for my blog now that blogcn offers the function of customise logo.i finished it in my baby’s home till 5 pm and when went down to the ground to receive my baby from his grandmom and some relatives of his mother.i hold to sports yard for awhile and bought him a bottle of water and a ball candy.soon his mother arrived and i left.
now i m in a cafe i first visit on the way between the dorm and my baby’s mother’s home.doggs attacking me.
bye.kiss u with cool.i love u.
for logo picture to large,i spend 2 hour and more to edit it online but just waste time.the cafe named longjiu(dragon nine),bugs there biting heavily.it cost me 4 yuan.after i finished dinner in a little restaurant,its already 8:11 pm.i did some customise to my blog in blogcn.com in starsea cafe and now again under attacks.
the street lost its usual day’s crowd.everyone have their gatherings,except me.in fact i also hurt my son’s mother.she shown her coldshoulder when i buzzed in to exchange daily bless.god’s know i m determined for u.
bye,the second haunt likely run out.kiss u with sweating.

 



{December 22, 2006}   posts migration part 1

Saturday, September 30, 2006

my search for my absent girl,zhou

 

odyssey in summer holiday: my search for my absent girl
2006-08-10 20:58:14 benz
what can soothe my bitter and biting miss for the girl from daqing practised in qrrs and disappeared like sun ray from my view before i can cling to and hold it.what can help a broken dream rewind and reunited us that can render me in heaven.
i beg u,girl zhou,leave me a clue to reach u,to trace u,to follow u.restless night i had endured in a once love teared me apart that time and i think i deserved not to lose u any more.
day in day out,i count every pieces of memories where u presented around me in the flashing period u stayed in the dormitory and continuingly found its likely to flow out,leaving my empty hands in the short random life of a humble man.
give me a chance to know u pl,as i entreat u twice.

2006-08-11 17:58:08 benz
a new dusk.i know i survived another heartthrobing day.i enjoyed beauties as usual and brake my neck to peek around,but i know my heart was dented by u,zhou.i times and times told myself i had a better choice with u.in fact with u i with the world.i remember ur jumping hairs when u stepped onto the ladder to the commom to withdraw money from coupon.i rember ur princess beaming above me when i look up to u on the second u leave the common and we encountered shoulder by shoulder.i remember ur pleased smiling tone to ur classmate when he ask u how to handle ur knife and ur coward tone when i steadily asked u secondly if i can know u when u departing qiqihar in the dormitory yard where we spend so many and so few days.but i mostly remembered ur shy but tenderly warming reckon to my first request to know u,u said then we r already acquainted.its so shocking grace that i lost all my words but left to choose to play badminton with u,but u know that not what i intended and i just want a private space with u

2006-08-11 18:22:24 benz
and u rebuke me by silence.u hinted me to chase after u to chat with u in 2 occasions but i missed.for i stubbornly think u should treat me different from the scratch.i know u will please all my dreams on wife at the moment u appeared in front of me in the night u was summoned and i ran into meeting the team outside the door.thats ur second time tentatively show urself to me among ur classmates.my soul was suddenly full of pride and love.i love u so.i dream u so.i had searched u so many years so.time a time again i destinied to find myself a tall wife with perfect buildups.time a time again i can’t hold my soul thirsties back in my 30s years so far in the world.i love beauty just like u.i love tender just like u.i seek being fullfilled with u.i can endure all loneliness for the sake u settled beside me like a feather to earth.i won’t say i want u for god says wanting will keep u from it but that’s just my yell,i would rather shut up all my voice to let the tender silent rebendable wish lead u approaching me

2006-08-11 18:43:28 benz
yes,u talked to me once when u return from the common and passed by some herds of newcomers to qrrs but i don’t know then and regard them ur classmates.i didn’t regret for my losing words to u at the moment for i think i deserved a face to face talk with u and without peering eyes.so many coincidence with u without any viable clue make me think we r preset united.i two nights step out dormitory without any cue or precedence and met u.its indeed.the day u went out to play badminton just when i felt our love doomed and miserable on the distant chair and i suddently felt ur presence and turned around finding u.in the 2 days after ur leave i retrospected all ur eyes behind the window behind the scenes and felt u must like me from very a early time since ur arrival.i inspected the possible time u decided to show me ur charm,or in my view u start to love me and i more and more belived u from the start when i sat on the chair reading pda when u queued to line in u cared me.i believed one or 2 points i let u heartthrob.

2006-08-11 19:03:03 benz
reviewing these let my heart full of self pity but i know i will get u.u r mine.u even controled me once when i stared a girl padding her bedcloth in sunshine and suddenly felt a cold shock.at the moment a man on his motor challenging me.u soon appeared behind me and i captured u on the stand rightly and leak a word:awesome.thats my first word to u.i know ur awesome.today i still believed in u.i know u can enforced and enhenced me.
i missed so many to catch u but i know there is a place i turned my back and found u.ur gracious smile belong to me.ur jumpping hairs,like ur unbeattable confidence,ur slim wrest and tall and trunkalike legs,ur bloomy face even without my full scan,they all belong to me,to my sole secret heart,my secret mind,my secret soul fountain.i offer u a tiny but boundless garden in my soul to caltivate.the garden i locked so many years ignored so many beautiful girl minds in my growups by ignorance,now i know that’s urs.im just the keeper,ur master servant.

2006-08-11 19:10:52 benz
ur mine.ur the crowned queen of my kingdom.i will spent 25 years with u.we will have 2 children.l love u.i love u forever.i love u from the heaven to the earth.i wish after spending enough nights’ dream with u u then appears in front of me beaming in the sun.that’s all our family.
kiss u.

2006-08-12 09:40:50 benz
another sweating night and peaceful dawn.i woke up with painful body and soul.i finished breakfast and idle around but only found can’t rid u from my mind.u lingered in my soul like a vain froggy cave,like a sleepless winter with always pale sky and indifferent wind cries.i stroke everywhere to search scent of ur smell but only lead nore empties.i looked at the lake surface mirroring sky and saw newly planted weeds weeping.i looked at the faces floating around me and saw fate made them all distant and caged.i see nowhere but the vain u left in my heart.it block my running days.u took away my pleasure of communication with my another part and deprived me of my vivid desire for a milk and honey land on ur body as well as ur soul i deserved.without u i like a fountain with dying source,without u i like a bird losing his componion.i m now a dumb bird in fact.u took away my confidence on my abilty to build my home with our hands and my thirsty to witness the full beauty of the universe.

2006-08-12 09:56:08 benz
i can run out of words to express my miss for u,but the vain hollow u indented in my body strives to surive forever.god leaves an opening in our hearts. i don’t know how to remind u to seal it in every right moment from now on.u r free of duty to do so but u can’t evade ur soul’s cry for mounting the way leading u to my bedside.u r mine.ur mine.u r a thousand years of mine.any obstacle can darken ur eyes but wind and sunshine always removed them from the bottom.
kiss u again.kiss u with

2006-08-12 13:44:10 benz
i can’t help but return now that burning heart and fatigued feet called.i changed coupon for exchanges to surf here for i ran now out of pocket money.world left not too much dust on me but the insatiable will to demonstrate my conquer to the unconquered.i beat,i frustrate,i swallow bitters yet open my eyes widely.i crawl,i trumble,i laugh at god’s guide on me at every corner in the mud.i packed myself like a knife ready in ur hand.i put my sights beyond ur jumping hairs sheltering ur windscreen.u r my pivot,my pioneer.i m ur vehecle.my son in ur womb and my daughter in ur arms.u r my backyard with grape trees shelfing sunshine and olive trees pointing height.i m urs.i m ur husband,ur watch eagle of ur dream in the dark in the night.i m vain.i m the fire warm ur cold clogged limb and the earth build ur pole.u fullfilled me by concrete,entertained me via home and family.my home in heaven and ur home in my heart.u r my heart.u let me see beauty and owning and satisfactory.i owe u.

2006-08-12 14:12:30 benz
but i have chance to redeem.u will be entertained by my land,my kingdom,my people and my soul.i m ur king,ur consistant loving king.i embrace u with my late tender,my sutle interest in truth,in beauty,in benevolence.u r my baby,my kid sister my parents didn’t give.i can comb ur hairs,massage ur wrest,bite ur eardrops,sing u a song and kiss ur watery lips.i m urs.at ur disposal.i m the band around ur hair,the ointment on ur nail.i m ur king.my people will applaud for the light and lightning u bring to me.on every leaves after rainbow u will see my feast.in every river flowing swift u will wit my plenty.i m ur king.sun rise,sun set,u’ll see my routine support to ur need,flower blooms,flower withers,i do my sniff on ur neck.u r mine.u r mine already one thousand years.i m ur master,my lamb,my kid sister,my baby,my heartthrob.my dearest,my sweatest.i looked over the sea floating the boat u drove away,i knew the day u back.i’ll be there the port,with my endurance and my bluest eyes

2006-08-12 14:52:11 benz
dear,what can soothe my relentless miss for u?all ur beauty was so near,just an elbow’s reach.today u still can lend me ur beauty to feed my torn and thirsty sight landscape.but u refused.u thirst for torments u can and only u can exert on my tiny heart.u do,u do,the merciless princess,my master.u do,u do,to extend our longings to a new height of tension.i longing u.i need u.i beg u.i surrender to u.u win.
from every girl passed by,i compared with u.for every male i ignored,i beg a retreat.i need u.with union with u,i need nothing to manifest to the world.with unification with u,i challenge god.baby,my kid sister,let me see u,smell u,sense u,touch u,play with u all my skills on earth or on heaven,vocal or mobile,mind or find.u took away so much from me that i bearly support myself.i listened to spontaneous chorus in the trees or near the lake,but only found my chorus with u.i listen to the beijing opera practise in the workers’ palace just wondering which stage our honeymoon now set.

2006-08-12 14:56:27 benz
i love,my dear.i will care my baby recently full day for my ex-wife now in charge of a graduating class.bye.
kiss u again and agins.u r there mine.i love u.

2006-08-13 08:54:59 benz
another blssed dawn,dear,u see the sunshine how cordial she is.i approach u via net again just after getting up and uncover the window curtain.i hope the internet caff named xinghai(starsea) where u haunted.i visited u returned from outside likely after surfing the night after i returned to care my baby and a rain poured timely to express my fear that u r to leave.i sat on the watery chair as soon as arrived the dorm yard and wait.2 girls walked away and around and i hope they r my friends to inform u my presence.u lately appeared and walked on the far side to kept distant from me and chatted with one of ur classmates.i felt miserable but also know u r mine.the night was ur last night ur class was summoned and i felt i had to do my presence after ur anger and fluctuation onto me so i kept stroke around ur team.the next day witness my struggle against losing u without a clear bless before u left.i stayed on the chair on the yard or rambled near ur dorm all day so as not to miss any occasion u present.i did.

2006-08-13 09:10:41 benz
and u only walked a two ways available for me to catch u.but i don’t complain.why i complain,our marriage on a day is inscribed like inscription in rock,why i complain.u like the flower in my garden,why i complain.
machine dog hunting,but i m on.why i complain?the day u shown up in front of me clumnsily pretending by accidence when i ran into with ur team and exchanged words with one of ur classmates gave me so many prde and love,why i complain.u had seen me for those days before u shown me ur decision,ur unpaired charm,why i complain?i lived 38 years in the world ,with tumble,with innocence,and u now hug me,lag me,let me enrich my love in the world,why i complain?i saw the clear star in the sunny sky,i see ur moonalike face with word-defying dignity.i love u.i love from the bottom of my heart at the moment when u shown me finally in the sun,with and without umbrella.
days after ur leave,i always imagined u didn’t directly left by taxi,i see u hide in xinghai net bar to watch me.

2006-08-13 09:54:23 benz
watching me follow u in vain to the bus stop and tried to find u in the waiting crowd.i just want to see u away well,as i in fact underconsciously prepared.after found nowhere to find ur leaving,i returned and met some men likely ur leading teachers with a qrrser packed in a taxi leaving and i knew u were the last left.u waited for me.i know,i know u care me,i know u love me.ur fragile voice when u defied my demand secondly to know u,saying u don’t want come to qqihar again,i saw the flash in ur eyes who closely peeking me,in a flash i recognized u r testing,u r holding me back.after i felt hurt upon ur reply i felt at a loss with ur coward attitude to my approach,but now i mostly cherished it,for its ur tender in front of me.u show me ur tender and helplessness.i couldn’t help holding u forever in my arms firmly,in my chest,in my soul.no one can destroy u,no one can not let us live.i promised u,no one.one one can cover ur eyes searching for me,no one can take aside my finger to ur

2006-08-13 11:02:28 benz
eyeslid.
a sunny day.a still day.buses whistle,citizen ramble,noise dispersed all over in the room.i know u r reading,my dear.heaven know which mood u r possessed currently.music rightly arise in the air in the bar.baby,could u hear my singing?u saw the day i sat on the bench facing sunset sang alone, for ur classmates test me if u would ask them to play volleyball actively.i didn’t.i sang there.then i don’t know u.u sheltered urself behind the curtail until ur classmates finished their shows prelude.but i know u,by instinct.for i seemingly never so sincerely performed to play in front of an alien body of collegians.i win u by proactivities but summons u to my front was the marrage once in heaven we had.i can’t help wondering sometimes if u can recognized my name occasionally called by the administrator of the common before u when i followed ur leave, and if u can arrived here by chinaren alumni.but time a time again i told myself u do.baby,i yet don’t know ur name,except ur family name,likely.baby,

2006-08-13 11:19:55 benz
i search fruitlessly for a empty name of a girl in her grade 2 in nankai unv. when i there prepared my master enterance exam once in a love broken my heart.i don’t know why i always like zhubajie in xiyouji(journey to the west) lost in girls’ march vanishly trying to clinch up to them by a shaddow of their skirts.but this time i wouldn’t miss.god permitted me.i know.u know.our soul permitted.our eyes permitted it.i looked into ur eyes,u first evaded with ur badminton in hand with half back to me and second u informed me on the departing way by worry in ur tone and starry in ur eyes,i have it ur permission open ur heart and locked it after me forever.i know ur permission with ur shy i had the privilege to occupy ur fragrant garden once and forever.
baby,machine dog hunting.i m to leave.the day we united the day they failed.i love u.i follow u at every corner of ur road.i m the wind wave ur hair,i m the air refresh u when u sore.i do,i do, u know,u know.i

2006-08-13 14:45:45 benz
here i m again,baby,my kid sister.noon sunshine on my back through the curtain on 2nd floor.i hope i didn’t trouble u with my more and more words.i did left the caff,i wandered to the trees yard where some aged men chorus ‘little alomo’ and really entertained me,who still rapt in words for u.i also sat aside the lake, down with the still water surface.but nowhere i can find peace and serenity with the full load of miss for u that can envy any young in season.i tried to fix my hacked to broken pda but only found my mobile disk also being hacked to illworking.i want to see my baby but was told his mother had assignment at the moment.the world seems lead me to u,my speechless beloved.baby,in this sultry afternoon,seemingly every boy has his play and every girl has her candy except me, me,i only has my solitude accompanied for years.u r the string of my fiddle but u let it loose.u let the bird tied his tongue and fear of the commence of dark night.i need u,and i don’t think it cost us much.

2006-08-13 15:10:41 benz
we r 1.5 hour’s train apart.u part me in the false claim and excuse that u dislike qiqihar but they all r in ur kingdom.i don’t ask u to stay in qiqihar.ur dislike is my dislike,the only difference is that i think we’d accept it before we change it.

2006-08-13 18:01:49 benz
then here i m again,like the story telling the return of king.dark marching near but sunset smiling as well.u see my endeavor.even ur fight out of my sight i know u win.u doomed to see my world,we r ruled to here see our fortune,with our son and daughter,with our people and fertile land.baby,u design urself,u r my design.i love u,from the heel to the hip,from the bottom to the button,from the front to the back.i saw hope in ur eyes,i saw harmony in ur legs.i saw god in ur hand.god guide u left with bags,he also guide u back with bigs.i love u.i never wrote so many to any.i never pray so wholeheart for my owns.u r mine,there and here,wax and wane,no power can disturb our pair,no energy out of our containing.i here not to bubble,i here to pacify.baby,my kid sister,let me know ur worry,and see the day u available stood me aside.honey,let me know ur name,let me put ur hands in my hands,ur heart in my heart.baby,baby,i here lean against u,u r not alone,u need just turn ur head back,i there.

2006-08-14 10:32:37 benz
so i have another 4 days to accompany u here as my ex-wife’s school changed its opening scheme.male beast around me biting and irritated my settlement but they r just bark upon wrong trees.bamboo curtain on my right hand wall adding some japanese tone to my mood.i left my son so as not to disturb his dream with my selfmade coarse disturbance,fuss.now that they like chasing,so just let them some wind and some shadow.now that they like licking,let them some bones.the world seemingly more and more smothered by energetic beasts,like their lucky bully and domineering parents showy all among the socail ladder in nowaday china.

2006-08-14 13:12:33 benz
then i return,after last posting intercepted and returned to me by eavesdrop just to tease me and also run out time.u tease me,dear.u r so distant from me,dear,i don’t know if u like to tease me or treat me fair.i only know the voice saying we r already known when i first time since my life approaching u.that’s ur promise to me.that’s my best surprise u put in my hands holding together.my dear,my kid sister,u won’t disappoint me forever and never.i love u.i treat u like my eyes and u will treat me like palm to back of palm.summer sunshine cast all over the street,made it like a boring nap,a fat cat without mice.but i know spirit moving flickers in ur lower heart,like lust river fluctuate over the tunnel under the desert.however we r enduring,my tumble finger wriggled along the road to u longly,my sight inner in nights toward the eastern not short.no matter how thick u cover ur neck with ur waving hairs,i sniff through;also no matter how vertical ur back opposing me with an arm

2006-08-14 13:41:34 benz
leading me, i will hold u tight on my chest with our mouth kissing.u r mine.now and then.here and there.

2006-08-14 17:56:12 benz
so i beseat again.a short rain wet my t-shirt and the crisp ground.i felt blessed.i m more and more used to talk to u even when i offline.if there is a better way connecting to u,i won’t hesitate a moment to access u,but u let me weave our love on the web so far.baby,baby,i dislike here in a crowd,i dislike being disturbed when i gossipping with u.but u forced me so.a day down with dusk by the drizzle,it can bring me with sorrow in hush.struggle in the sunburn is not fun.so it maybe the cause that not leading u me aside?u may right,but remember,no one can harm u,i tell u now,i tell u,no one can harm u.that’s my order in my kingdom.u r mine,enemy can block us yet to find lavatory to be given his dirty birth.yes,that’s my say.gambler and thieves all have it.lived with broken head and torn stomach all have it.that’s my say.my ordain.

2006-08-14 18:05:16 benz
a beast left,but still more come.i fight for ur children,for our family glory,for ur worshiped ancestor.dogs and crabs play its climax before the autumn,but their corpse will under the snow and turns into oil await human offspring to burn.that’s my vision.i bless it.the shouting to cry,the batting to crawl.that’s my say.i see land innocent,she fed up with robbery and pressing.she emitting.we here collected the land,we r privileged to clean the dirty and plant the beauty,that’s we say.
yes,god says they r parts of u,but i m not god.i m i m to be,to do,to make.to those like shits,offer him shits; for those like blood,offer him sword;for those like tomb,offer him death.world hold nobody.a hand in steel gloves can do.u can do,i can do.that’s all we can do.
i love u.

2006-08-15 08:00:46 benz
so i sat here again.dawn descend with peace in my awake eyes.i went out and saw the sun,its espacially so mild,so kindling,its just like spring sun after the mid sky.it make u warm and hopeful.i head to here awaiting love spring spill from my heart who is so dogtired for missing u so long.the caff preparing for reservice,so i laid my eyes fixed on the accountant,who has a enviable round breast under her loveable white shirt.i looked her slim wrest and thick bottom.i felt a little bit liking her.life so tender,i with no cause not to love any way anywhere,with or without ur companion.last night in the dorm,just after i calmed myself down from the ignited fire mood here and exchanged daily bless with my baby and his mother and ready to fetch myself a cup of water,i met the tall girl with her boyfriend,a taller young man with proper poise.i liked her very much.she had helped me a time when i suffered imaginged loss onto my beloved once by her showing me up.its her second showing up in

2006-08-15 08:20:20 benz
front of mine and i felt at once god’s so kind to me,on happy time and perished.she show her anger of discontented to me,just let me more linked to her.she also had a perfect round standing breast and palmtree-alike legs.she is not so sleeve-tucking,she is just so womanly,cosy and acceptantly.i like her,and sometimes compared her to my grand sister or mother.i don’t know if i can find them in u,but i know i m to have it,in u or by u.

2006-08-15 08:26:25 benz
i m timed now.i love u as usual.i hope u let me seen u,kissing u,with ur hand in my hand.i just can’t live without u.
i love u.bye.

2006-08-15 12:32:57 benz
so i rewind now.beast stamping around as expected.but i know i doomed to stand last.morning witness my miss for u with choruses here and there.with a bare mind of sorrow i even can’t fully appreciate the music.dogs scattered here and there,but i just raptured in my words for u.the chorus in trees sang a song lyrics ‘farewell fairwell girl in my dream,tomorrow i will head far away,if i won’t return,please …’,i was touched and known u r suffering.but,dear,but, none of us will be part, until the day u beside my bed covering my eyes don’t see with ur babies of mine with cries.the day beyond generations can see,but god promised it to us with bless,with joyes and tears,with owning and being,with benevolence.dear,dear,my kid sister,i love u like now my choked throat,like candle in collapsed mine,like blast in seconds.
world soaring,i dadle.u let me here suffer.god knows why but i don’t know.u know why but i don’t believed in urs.we’r an hour’s train apart,why not pick it soon?i admitted i always

2006-08-15 12:53:01 benz
have no clue toward girls’ taste,but u had advantage to fish in.if i m a fish in ur pool,pl let me know ur bait.
i love u.kiss u.bye.

2006-08-15 15:21:58 benz
so i m set now,now that write here to let u read at any time more interesting than i murmured and lost in mass.it turns cloudy now but there is no differences in my heart.gamers babble around and i tried to find a stance.u,and u,u r a remote sign in my sight on the over sky.i rambled and finally had to be here to wire with u in the weakest sense.u r so faint in the sensible world around me,that i sometimes felt myself miserable.baby,baby,i see limpidly the fate of ur being with me for most of my life,my being ur forever husband,but i don’t tell the moment i smell ur hands and hairs with tears.god treats me well but merciless upon my zest for a expedite warmup.u know why u treat me with so many animuses indicated in ur back to my hands out extending,ur mute to my sings to bleeding.

2006-08-15 15:55:47 benz
can u hear,baby?can u hear?i talk to u and decided talk to u till u hear.
god bless u.i love u.kiss u with my deepest love.

2006-08-15 18:05:58 benz
im set here again.with pains with hopes.with pity with tear in wild joyes.i hear u sing aside my ear in the radio from a disabled smoke vendor’s radio set.i saw promise in my pda.i know u,i need u,i bewith u.baby baby,if tears can wash,i can destroy hanghe bank;if tears can salt,i have fed u up older than me so far.girl,my honey,my worn slippers by my endless toddle around ur absence accuse ur cruciality.baby,my girl zhou,any tain has its stops,why my station can’t see ur horn?
today i bought some pears.i guess the squirrel u know in the yard trees may complains my lost in u.i left it two and ate one myself.if i spent as much time on her as here she will i guess let me hold her on my laptop,at least let me know her name.for what u treat me so immortally indifferent?
bright sunset reflects on the glass door i facing.she may doubting why i haunt here while arrived with hope left with missing.no music symphonies my song so far,only shouts of gamers.lonely in miss for u is me.love kiss

2006-08-16 07:58:57 benz
now music dancing.u belong to me.i got up too early but felt too late.i waited here for an hour and felt lounged in the train station with noise and boring as its feature.clouds cover most of the sky from eastern to western,leaving a hole in the mid sky,like my dry mouth yelling for ur milk.it had not been warm enough to let u pleased.autumn in the corner around a stop sniping and then killing winter lands like air force with freshest impetus.i dreamed in the dawn.but my vividest dream is u,ur being with me,being my wife with me.there is a painting aforetop on the wall coloring wines and cocktails,its just like ours ahead,full of deluxe and complacence.u r my wine,years brewed,years stored cool in floral valley.i m ur bear,drunk bear.the caff is now quiet,with only half used,with some social persons gossip there.many wellbeings grant the open space theirs,now that they can used it now freely.i here also being felt benefited,even i paid.many thing in china with so felt safeguards turns

2006-08-16 08:32:58 benz
out to like this,with top down.
so i was set forth now.ripple waving and forth and backward in the pool.there is nothing sepcial.there is no specail in our reunification,too.but u r specail,u r so weak,so dewy,ur world wheel still like a roll of kid.u beforth with option.
bye,i love u.kiss u.

2006-08-16 12:18:58 benz
so i be here again,in ur hands,in ur eyes,in ur faith.the sun now turns surprisingly bright.we’ll had a good time from now.how i miss here when i offline,even with faintest link with u here.i breaded and salted now but don’t know if u hunger for me.the cafe now crammed,rambles here and there.i trying to find myself a stance.days and evenings glides between us without any droplet of accord.god,i in the name of god,don’t know why u treat me so coldblooded.ice caps melting all over the world except urs built on my volcano of admires for u.miss like mist darken and wet my heart.bugs and flies stain the cafe and roads.u know why i had to seek u with answer known here on the web.if u can see,u can’t seen my drained appeals,if u can hear,u can’t heard my burnout cries.god knows why but i don’t know,u know why but i don’t belived in ur why.my most loved summer fading,my best loved girl rating.yellow leave to drip,wild wind to blow,my girl disappeared in a blink still sip the wine of my loving letters.

2006-08-16 12:48:52 benz
snow to shelf our house,spring rain to melt our well,my girl, zhou,still prepare her dowry for her bear with her nail.
bye.kiss u.

2006-08-16 17:58:08 benz
so i be here.likely spying phenomenon bankrupted my enthusiasm.a day ahead to acompany u here in a foreseeable short period.i don’t know where my talk to u lead to,but i felt my talk likely threatened.
however,i had a good time this afternoon with beijing opera.chinese traditional vocabulary talked to me and i got a glimpse within my preset.i wondering ur parents,and i know i won u.tonight likely a peaceful and harvest night.i hope i can recall interview with u in dream after wake up.dorm is not usually a fun place.i more or less was used to living with family,a family of u within.sky is so blue when i came here and the sun so bright in the cloud sea,like an emperor in chinese traditional pattern looking over the earth of his kingdom.i felt she really diligent,and stern.
i really distract by the likely hacking.so,i say bye in advance.i love u.i kiss u with my all warmth i gather under sun today.god helps me have u.

2006-08-17 09:02:56 benz
so i here again.hacking let me review.but nothing need ur close attention.dogs union and islamic terror,all shits eater, bark upon u, but they r kept at bark,just like their lazy fat wives’ doggie.god’s bless shrines our family and our land,like sitting in the core of typhoon.i love u.
this morning i got up late.i dreamd of zhangqing,whose first name same of the last name of the city u now in,whom i alumnused in high middle school and university.she led my farewell to my girlfriend in unv. nankai and one of my best friend in college,qiuxiaolin,a tall thin man with mild temper, in and enlighten the rest time of my college with pleasure in poem and painting otherwise would bore me into tears.i love u.and i know i destinied to have u,to be compensated to be reward.to be succeeded step by step and to be echoed of god’s glory and smiles.i dreamed of she danceing,like her dance she performanced in nankai unv.’s student culture festival.
so i was set forth again,here and till.mild wind shakes

2006-08-17 09:49:49 benz
hair on my forehead and music unbearable blue and beautiful.u hiss near my ear with ur mindless tease.god,in the name of god and for the sake of god,god knows why i can only summon with a part name and distill with a few memories.i heard ur sound of vioce saying we r known,but i yet to know the weight of ur body,the height of ur chest,the unit of ur love,and measure of ur foolish demand of my being on the kneel.i don’t know ur perfume,i don’t know ur kiss strongth,i don’t know the dimension between two of ur legs.i also don’t know why u don’t tell the blue deepth of ur sorrow for me in ur mute.dark dear,my dear in dark,i guarranty u good time from now on,startles and surprise will just like biscuit scattered in the bugged road.faint music whirlpools in ambiance.bugs and flies busy.overnight rotten smell smells in the half empty cafe.day shines outside of the glass door i facing.leaves reflecting,and herds.i know u heard.today i join a class of industial design 03-1 of daqing petro

2006-08-17 10:15:05 benz
baby,my kid sister,my girl zhou,sky sheltered us both,why not let us approach to each other closer in the missing world?river flew from here i m to ur side with tears of mine in it why not sent a paper boat carrying ur message of ur heart breaking for me to me looking forward?winds may helping even in opposing direction. why not let ur heart just trust to the world?my world in ur hand but u just toss it aside,my fate in ur faith but u just giggle like itching.apple in eyes of mine,milk in drough mouth and honey can cure,my dear my girl,come,and come to me.took my voyage to the wonder.
kiss u.i love u forever.

2006-08-17 14:00:03 benz
so i was band onto the seat.i just made some minor mends to my wording,then found a little girl beside me i had thought her a boy.i love u like i love the girl in a moment.god blessing.
baby,another sunny day.few clouds with pure white floating around the center part of the sky.i gazed at the sun till i found its circle,its zhou.the girl arouse me,even i still in doubt if wholely from her.buggy here and there,embarrassingly crawling on skin.yes,now i know my liking poured to her,for i exchanged some words with her.its likely a trap but doesn’t matter.i bewith the girl.
sometimes dogs harrass but they r harmful by their abilty to hurt.they just emotionally exert terror with their seemed penetrating dog eyes but in fact they r shortsighted.they can not be not shortsighted for their appetite,their comprehension.what they interested is inchangeable foul,foul and foul.let it scent well,it well so troubled with burden of scents that it had to see animal doctors more and more nowaday.let it be.

2006-08-17 14:22:23 benz
let it be and let none of scent of it it desperate to left in ur mind.that’s all.
god warrant everyone is unique.but missing thing,like dog person, tried to peek others to compensate his emptiness.just let it be.never mind they a second,like u don’t mind flies and bugs.
baby,i likely timed out this time.i tell u in the end i heard ur singing from the radio saying u will live happy with my love.that’s my best news.i love u.kiss u with my freshest beat from my heart.

2006-08-17 17:51:40 benz
u sing in the radio u r selfish on my love and demand all of mine,that’s right.love definitively the selfishest emotion of human relation,except god’s love.i also demand u fully,with ur best and ur lest.
i now sat near the back door of the cafe,ready to exit.i flirted with neighbor girl to shift illwill around exerted on me.i hope i can return here after i take full day care of my baby daily but i can’t assert.
the cafe had start to plot against me.i kicked 2 times within this post.maybe my song toward swan’s ending song.maybe my dance toward phoenix’s burning to rebirth.love planted in our heart,chorus echoed in our soul,gathering scheduled in our pledge.i love u.kiss u with promise of our union,our remeet.

2006-08-20 17:42:57 benz
i sat here in a sunny after rain sunset.my son’s mother was rid of the charging seat to her class so i had time in afternoon.the cafe likely can’t bring more pleasure to me.i had nothing to reiterate,except to let u know i suffer miss for u just like u.my son and his mother besieged by illwilled neighbors and i had to hold my son in arms outside to let him sleep in open air.live without house seemingly my fate to overcome.depressed lust sometimes let me smothered and desperate to miss u.
i need u,baby.my son bring happies any time when i caught sight of him but my desire for u is totally different.i sensed u visited me on last friday.in the night i woke up by ur compete with my baby son.i had nothing to say on this until the day u breed our children.
baby,i love u.if i spent time in idle,don’t complain my not accompany u here.i m with u any moment any occasion.let u speed up to decide the moment u lent me ur hand.i love u.kiss u with my sweatest dream beholding u.

2006-08-27 17:24:59 benz
so i be here again.i saw dawn pushing his way on bed outside the curtain after woke up by the pains u put another miniature last afternoon playing badminton and another girl breeding a rabbit,both ignited my sore temptation to chase after them like without memories after u ,and temp to miss u and hold u.i got up at 5 o’clock and wandered around the front part of qrrs but only collected cold.i then put myself on bed wondering till lost consciousness.that cured more or less my painful and stuffed brain and body.i waited and waited for my charging pda to be ok even i had started to murmur to u.
these days all sunshined in qiqihar.but gay and gray,thief and stiff pested me and my beloved.i enjoyed staying with my son,even that means paddling 5 hours or so outside without any eyecatchings,on contrast,limpets here and there.

2006-08-27 17:29:24 benz
last post was my first time i left without exchange of farewell.i felt need surf my oldtime passion tlf forum to recede my pains.so its likely u r part of mine from now,part of my mind and part of my inner.i laid myself on bed all the afternoon,with a stuffed brain and pains torn heart.my mind stopped 2 or 3 times and soon woke up again.but only found inevitable pains.with mountain mounted miss in my heart,i speechless,motionless.pains in my hearts as well as in my body,i know,just like ur eyes burn by tears.i always know u r suffering when i found my suffering.without u i m like the garden lack of an eyes,with u i like the dragonfly seeding the flower.without u i m like the water mill worn by invading of sands into its cog,with u,i like the fresh water gathered and lifted to a new height and runing singingly to its new feeding,its new drought land.without u my life like a aged song fading its rhythm,without u my landscape losing its interest center,like a twist mirror covered by dust

2006-08-26 18:14:56 benz
and laughed pointlessly and soundlessly to the mirrored vainness.without u my life proceeded like a roll losing its hand,without u my heart always begging and ramming into hard cold dark.
baby,baby,my kid,let me know if u r ready for me.baby,baby,my kid,let me know if ur head near my ear.
love u forever

2006-08-28 18:07:56 benz
i m here again,looking the road u left.machine dog and other spy eyes aimed at my pda and hard reset it countless times.last night i had a longest and most detailed dream in which i met my kid time folk friend,happened in weihai unv. and saw all collegians busy building marine robot.i seemed very enjoyed the dream and happy upon wake up.and i also had a nice day with my baby son outside in the morning.yesterday i beat him for he felt suffer loss when i run out of money to buy him drinks and food other dubious persons bought showily in front of him and demanded them unbendablely.we later reconciled after i persuaded him with preach and he surprised me with a buzz in after our daily bless in late evening and hummed to answer me without precedings.his mother and me both felt glorified.
however,loomingly ahead is that they to proceed to bet on poison,which just let god to laugh louder.they doomed to fail after all,after desperate to break my pda to free me once and forever.i m with no

2006-08-28 18:12:29 benz
haste to see all plays out.
standing sun surrounded by unclear mist now,but it still shines.and whats best he still fried all green things on earth.in the coming winter they can dominate the dorm to hack my pda as long as i use it,now that the chill likely will hamper my staying outside to read on it.they almost see their end and almost lose their temper and pretender,which almost let god see his laughter.
baby,i can call it a day now.i heard u sang in the radio a day that we need to embrace every coming day with high,i do my best to apply it.hope u practise it,too.time hold no brief for anybody,we just need to see through and stand firmly to last.every golden sunset now is our promised poise through cloudy winter to next prime time.
i love u.kiss u.kiss u with the brightest star from the most distant dark sky on my tongue.kiss u with my whole heart.

2006-08-31 18:36:13 benz
so its a day now.sunset redden the sky.i just returned from my baby son and finished dinner.i in a rush to here but without any message in mind to utter.its a nice day,even dark in the morning,for i had been hacked by pretender in the dorm via mind monitoring.but god let me just let it go and beam as usual.my baby slept in my arms in the morning and in the afternoon.in afternoon we were in sports yard where his mother’s school boy of first year undergoing army train.with enjoyable companion of soldiers i felt easy and indeed safeguarded with ease my baby’s sweat dream till his mother return from work woke him up.i even treat myself in the name of my baby a bottle of beer within a mean budget for meals.
i had nothing to complain about today even a bit dogtired for rambled outside for 8 hours with barely any stops to rest awhile.my baby also didn’t bankrupt my budget for his drinks and snacks outside.
i miss u,baby,some couples shown intimacy beside us on swing just remind me the fact

2006-09-01 10:59:39 benz
some human being enjoyed lover without deep loving while i deeply loving u but without ur companion right at hand.it also remind me i had a lot to do to keep our love timelessly fresh and acute.
today my son’s mother told me we all just got our new id card and ready to file divorce.i think it will be done within weeks.she also arranged her relative to care our baby son so as not to let me care my son late to 8:30 pm in this semester/term till her night lesson over.i will see my baby 2 or 3 times in daytime a week.i likely will spend more time with u here,even i desperate want to see and believe u rather than just being wired.i know u had ur timetable,but i want u to touch my skull and lips,like i kiss my baby insatiablely.
i love u.kiss u again and again.

2006-08-29 18:31:09 benz
so i m here baby.a day passed with no fault.my son slept in my arms each an hour in the morning and afternoon outside.we ate a lot of ice sticks as usual.in the afternoon he again demanded drink in addition and cried upon rebuff but soon slept.his mother let me free tomorrow and will call me to prepare working environment basing on my collection of 0day’s warez(an international pirate softwares release org) on her first notebook assisted by her school if its dispatched to her.i also felt glad for her.she admired it for quite some time and distant from pc for a rather long time since i always occupied our pc when we under same roof.i always spare no efforts to persuade anyone i met enjoys computer and digital gadget.
dear,i m now of peace and complacance.there several girls around me in the cafe and i immersed in sunshine enough in daytime to felt warm now.the only pity no doubt was of ur absence from me.last night i had a long dream in which i met my college alumni then sheered away to

2006-08-29 18:53:37 benz
visit the enterprise of zhangruimin,hair’s founder,finding feat and fake.the pretender monitored me mindly in the night and dawn,till my son’s mother alarmed me to leave.i really of no complain except the loss i suffered that u took away,ur beautiful mind and perfume body.ur glamor and ur calm.
i recently bought myself some jujube to remind myself my forever searching for u till i got u.u r doomed mine.in the end of time and on the seashore beyond the most distant sea,in the heaven and on the deserted earth i find u, and pick u.
i love u.kiss u.

2006-08-30 17:53:18 benz
so its another day now.last night i slept lately to defend my son from his mother’s dubious relative,the elder sister of her mother,once came to care her when our baby in a month to the world.i know my baby son untouched all over the world in which evil brewing,but i do what i liked to do for him.i drank a bottle of beer and found a large crowd in the dorm boiling upon my delayed sleep.mind hacking continued till late afternoon when i napped on bed.
now i had a home at myspace with url http://www.myspace.com/benzillar .hope a day i can enjoy it.this morning i brought some pc magzines from qrrs libary to kill the time.
after all i can still call it a nice day.even my son’s mother didn’t fetch her new notebook as intended,her school said it need to be refined in advance but just let me doubting the hacking hand from machine dog,as happened a lot of times on our pc.
bye.i setup my blog in chinaren.i love u.see u next time.kiss u with my tears in dreams

2006-08-31 18:50:21 benz
another day downing with rosy sky.i couldn’t be more happier.i holding my baby son slept in arms half an hour in morning and almost 2 hours in afternoon.right in afternoon when he slept in my arms i understand i can adopt skill of zen to abate bubbles from unwelcome wishes from adversity:settled/stillness.settled urself will settled ur beloved resulting in enhencing his/her concentration to warrant him/her win in adversity ,and the world outside settled in ur blink.i did it among a crowd as usual furiously aim at my slept baby.they let him irritated one or two times but didn’t woke him up.last night when i struggled with mind hacking in the dorm then gradually i fell into serenity in which i missed u solely.i then sensed ur presence haunting outside my door and i called forth ur figure im familiar and had some emotional exchanges with u without fear of being peered.i woke up at 7:00 and saw the bright sun first time recently.on dinner,i m so glad that i treated myself a bottle of beer

2006-09-01 09:23:03 benz
so its a new morning now.i had a nice night with world settled in my body breathing within god’s body,after i settled my mind and the ambiance,let every dust still in air and every moment at present.i love u,baby,god let u sang ‘TITANIC’s ‘my heart will go on’and other love songs in my radio i refurnished after years ditched and i m so touched.if there is a sense called love,i sensed it with craving;if there is a feeling in the name of miss,i miss u with ur every images left in my beings with no miss.baby,baby,my kid,drizzle last night was my tears for the pleasure u gave then took away,cloudy morning this time hints u put on more my cares against cold and indifference.baby,my kid sister,if there is a way leading light,god prepared it for us;if there r messages that save,i murmured thousands times in ur careless dreams.baby,my dear,if there is only a word for love,we say give;if there is only a flower in garden combing the love u hold for me under her bloosm,its bee is me.kiss u.

2006-09-01 11:47:11 benz
baby,i decided to shift my searching letter for u to my blog at chinaren and mypace.com without ur concent.its ur privilege but i think we have more ahead.for alumni seemingly less irrelevant with our love.
my blog at sohu: http://benzillar.blog.sohu.com/
my blog at myspace: http://blog.myspace.com/benzillar
my home at myspace: http://www.myspace.com/benzillar .where u can talked to me or left me comments.

1:08 PM

Friday, September 01, 2006
a busy day with sorting and shifting old posts.
a dismal day without dark outcome.i shifted alumni posts to blogs,at a price of 3 hours and 3 renminbi or more,and made some customization to these blogs.in the afternoon the radio elaborated on trust and i felt the migration was trusted by u.on bed listening to the music radio i sometimes felt choking throat.but i felt settled now.the world seems now opener for me with easy access to other bloggers,even under present situation i likely unable to skim theirs.u also seems closer to me,with easy access to comment on my blogs without letting me know ur real name,or even chat with me.i desperate for communicating with u.winter around the corner,jammed dorm can be more unpleasant.i don’t know how u deal with miss for me and jackass around u,but each time i felt worry about u i consoled myself u r just right beautiful and precious and dewy as i dreamed.the limpid to be limpid,the dirty to be dirty,the harsh to be harsh,all under god’s watching.i deserved u,perfect as i can imaging,u deserved me,dauntless to face any beauties or virtues.
i m to leave.tomorrow i believe to be a sunny day.at one pm just after i finished migrating post in chinaren alumni to blogs and returned to dorm i ate the last jujube. i felt its not a bad runout,and a new start.tomorrow i will go to see my baby son.rolling world gathers no mercy for broken hearts.i lived with a stuffed closet for u,burden made me strong,and indifferent.
kiss u.i love u.
6:31 PM

Sunday, September 03, 2006
it turned out to be cloudy.
i was left half an hour now after customise.still i hope i can talk to u.this afternoon i entrenched myself on bed listening music radio but still ill wishes from neighbor rooms in the dorm creeping on my skin.i had to trenched them with the radio and my tools.later i hear u sang, after rain and storm u will accompany me hand in hand forever,like rainbow shines after storm,i released and switched it off and to dine.now i m here aside ur ear,hope u can hear.

baby,i m to time out.kiss u.i love u as usual.i heared a lot of love songs in the afternoon,some complain,some applaud,but i stand unyieldingly to have u,nothing can break my will to get u.moon light every night cares ur dream in my deep glare.

now the second hour after exchanged daily bless with my baby.evening put the dorm in dark,weekends led its end.a bustle and hustle working day ahead.tonight might be a war field near my bed but im in ur bless,and god’s.these days i permeated in the talk to u and bugs likely summoned.i m of no trouble to lead it its due way.bugs even biting here, but they just dirty the air.

tonight,tonight will be stary.for all bugs and flies,the killing commencing.winter had drove them sheltered in the warm room,but them doomed to die.the only trash they brought is that we had to clean the floor to rid their stiffs.

tonight,tonight will be a peaceful night.autumn reaps our love,our passion.we r timed to relief,to wine.

kiss u.love u like the star above our head sky,with his light messenger without pause arriving our land,with patience with care.

bye.my dearest.

6:36 PM
sunny afternoon
baby,so im here.i made some amendments to my wording then half an hour passed.in the room listening music after last post i just want to talk to u more,and that let me reckon my budget.i’d better balanced budget among my baby son,u and my own to avoid deficit,but coming cold season likely buffers the running demands among my life through reduces on my baby son’s drink outside.

i seemingly had no urgence to utter.after all i m being with u.u touched me via flickering sunshine and periodical shaddow through my window.that’s ur changing mood in my gaze.i love u.kiss u a thousand times and a more time.

1:16 PM
a wet morning
so baby im here and hear.last night i return with sore all over my bady and in daily bless with my son’s mother i guessed maybe i was hurt by surrounding in the cafe and complained but later when i listening to the radio,the lingering sore in bady and mind let me recognize that u r sobbing.u know i ran out of words to express my loneliness and miss for u in the last post,but u still touched.baby,i can word to let u feel my love but i can’t award myself ur heart right now in ur vow; i also unable aboard to find u at moment,mopping ur tears and hopping u to our home.god let me here pile letters every day to lift me to reach u.

last night’s drizzle let some shallow pools on the concrete ground.its just our overnight tears of missing.last night i first time put on winter quilt,switched from thin towel quilt,let me restlessly awhile for hot,but i fell into sleep in unparallel short time.barks maybe rampant but thats all out of my dream.

bye,baby,my kid sister.summer rain day always let me happy and poetic but autumn rain day just let me sobering and sorry.i may hurt u but u know i did it mindless.love made me mindless.as the proverb saying, love empties brain,brain empties love.i had to fetch u,like i fetch my always cryings for u.kiss u,i love u.near and far.

10:14 AM
nice day again.
so god prefer my forecast to the radio weather forecast(saying last night cloudy in qiqihar today) and let it sunny today.i love it.my baby son got up at 5 o’clock and let her mother holding him outside to buy breakfast,likely irritated by the old woman of his mother’s relative.we played in the waiting room for his mother allowed to leave home after 9 am and had a good time.he later slept and slept for 2 hours till 11 am.i guard his dream with close eyes but awake aside him on bed.as soon as he woke up i held him outside to wait his mother leaving her school,and on the road we ate fried crab meat.

it can’t be more nice.at dinner in dorm canteen,4 or 5 tall girls all with enviable figure shown up and really let me licking.in these days qrrs,the workplace i was employed, seemingly held its annual autumn sports contest,and large colorful floats had been prepared in open air in the square for days.all seems bright superficially.

baby,last night u sang in the radio demanding me being braver,so i made a declare in ur alumni in chinaren.com at http://alumni.chinaren.com/class/class_index.jsp?classuuid=2817034545008715989 .i hope that’s ur alumni.none daunts me except u.

today likely the second day of the new semester of u.i m listening the music from the first visiting bogger to my blog at sohu.com,whose blog at http://caohaizi.blog.sohu.com/ .its title is ‘had to love’. i hope i here can add some love to let u high.

baby,its my second time here within 2 hours.i scheduled to spend an hour a busy day but had to add another hour to finished this blog after first hour timed out and returned to dorm.i m likely pinched in words tonight.the only phrase i needn’t concoct is my forever love,and the desire holding ur hands immediately.today i first time go to bathroom in summer.and every women seemed let me ignited.i search u in every women i sighted but only blured ur image in my heart and sharpen my miss for u,for i know ur the best in the world in my world.i hold u dear,baby,hope u endear me,too.

bye.kiss u.i love u like the moon light on ur desk in ur dorm through the window through the night.kiss u with my fatigue and sweater.

8:07 PM

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

sunny noon.
i just skimmed all visiting blogs shown on my blog and add one to my favorite.noon sunshine stings skin but let me soothed.in the morning after post,i laid my own on bed and felt cold.running mind wanders in force field of bugs and my gravity.3 hours passed without music in silence.god knows what i can’t betray and whom i can’t not to pray for.my blog led its first comment and how i wish its urs,how i hope its u teasing me.i prayed in stiff poise too long and only u can relief me.i kneeled too docile in the fate of ur choice and only u can settle me.ur faint voice like silver bell ring in the farest wind above city forest made me too hard to follow,ur once warm left on my body and soul under the thickening ashes after days and nights burning of my cries for u risk buried. dear, could i speak i would alarm u every dawn my presence above ur pillow, could i draw i would rebuild u from scratch for a shortcut onto ur door in dream in wet warm night.

bye.dear,kiss u.love u in my heart and in my oath.

1:17 PM

a sunny morning after disturbances in the forenight
so i was left less then half an hour after finding problematic server of sohu’s blog system,and a dubious reboot the pc in the cafe.last night i felt hard to sleep,first against bugs in the dorm,then it suddenly came to me if u r missing me and desire me.i then sensed ur restlessness,ur piteous taking with no giving,ur liking me with no loving me.deep night star pity ur trouble with silence.but all of us know u had to offer urself to me for the biggest pleasure u will enroll.all world see the theorem except u,except u blinded by ur love in fact in deep in guise for me.

bye.i love u.kiss u with the rising sun.

9:04 AM

sunny day even autumn sunshine limp |
so its a busy day with my baby on the road.he slept in the cool morning along the busy car track in my arms till a too loud speaker of a newly opened wedding photo company woke him up.we ate icecream and fried jerk till his mother returned with her new notebook of brand benq.at home we busy playing with the notebook and my baby couldn’t let him being set aside and also busy padding on it till his mother felt can’t afford.in the afternoon he soon slept after crying for his mother’s departure and the sunshine at noon also let me doze,but in fact we were surrounded by hunting people,mostly aged,they let my baby irritated several times but i just let it go.their power windblown after fired.thats all bugs can do.

so now i m here after a beered dinner.red sun still hanging on the western sky,indicating autumn can be shared even short.and last night was a waveless night.i dreamed of one of my sons,or my kid brother went to mental disease asylum to visit me but themselves trapped and supervised.then seemingly all my college alumni supervised in the asylum where a doctor directing us or them breaking lots of furnitures into pieces to migrate to a new place,a new asylum.i seeming just a side watcher in it.after woke up i found my curtains leaking light outside in the mid,and after curbbed the curtains,i found a limpid sunny morning.and i at once headed for my baby.

so its dusk now.beat and rhythm launched now.its a fast pace rhythm.bugs around me were replaced by 2 girls facing me.i was of no harsh.now its a love song,touching as ur smiles and tears,roaming as ur perfume and the flash in ur eyes.

bye.kiss u.i love u.in dream and in sunshine.

now another hour now that so nice a day and words for u lingering in my mind.night cafe like a play place with all gamers’ babbles,except me,except my sincerity to talk to u in the aim to win u stood me aside earlier.ur college life will gliding like still water,but deep running is ur tumbling undecided will on how u to treat me.my crying for u like a well known legend in ur common sense but it times woke u up in the deep night.i mean it,u more and more mean it.we can’t mingle it with any stories or laughters.my assertion on our marriage looming like a mirage under the sky,like a relic unearthed.u tried to tease around among ur classmates,ur casual qq friends but u just can’t find pleasure in them as usual.then u found u r doomed mine,mine as ur inevitable destiny.ur fate castled in my love,ur life cascaded in me the royal.u r one of the royal.my kingdom requisitioned under ur blink,my land spreaded below ur wind.we,my kingdom and me,the king,right in the wait for u.

bye.dearest.kiss u with the longest breath in the dawn.i love u,like the dew to the summer night sky.

7:03 PM
Wednesday, September 06, 2006

a fault free sunny morning with periodical breezee.
so i with u after breakfast.clear and warm autumn morning light charged me a lot.last night i easily fell into sleep.and i dreamed.i dreamed i almost missed the grand college entrance exam by my malicious cousin’s helping hand and let my parents in a fuss.but we,me and a folk companion,finally arrived before the last minute limit.zhou,the deputy party secretary of qrrs and another cadre came to our home to let me write down what i answered on the exam papers.when i woke up,its six o’clock and i returned to quilt after urined till 7:10.

baby,later after leaving here i will head for my baby son.hope u a wonderful day.last night thoughts of mingy hearts flash into my mind blamed that i m cheating u.and i review my behavior and really likes playing trick.but god always economic to the use of his superpower.great love great achivement involve great risk.i fenced against the exertion of dog’s penetrating then i soon slept.

bye.baby,my kid sister,i love u.kiss u with the perfume of nipped summer flower.

9:24 AM

a full sunny day
its almost a day now.round sunset especially large.in the afternoon after posting i sat on the bench on which i received ur arrival for an hour motionlessly.i still felt exhausted now after on bed for an hour listening music and dined.then i spent an hour in addition to add music box to homepage of my blog.its the only place i can feel near u,felt near the straw to save me from drain of miss for u.burning head like a blank bamboo basket holding no water from ur splash once in my pool.now im listening my selected song,’moonlight in city’, of xumeijing which sounds in my folk tongue like water beautifully still.she touched me,and i hope she also touch u.that compensate my work in the afternoon.

im now likely surrounded by bugs and distracted.im now on the second floor of the cafe,starsea internet cafe,peaceful dusk outside the window really placating.i m in a loss in the folk song i selected as the first song of my blog homepage.misery shaded in nowaday modern city life but they just lingering in hearts that sensitive.however,i lived fed and lounged and pains u brought me brought me baptism of fire and blood-soaked kinship.i love u.im in misery of ur setting but i still live with love,with love for u,for ur coldblooding under discipline and might premature stub of stubborn.

bye.kiss u.i love u.kiss u with honey among my teeth to soften ur hard heart.

an additional hour killed skimming visiting blogers.how i hope i can find u in them.

6:34 PM

a busy day indoor preparing working environment on my son’s mother’s notebook
my son’s mother took part in a banquet held by her colleague and i felt better stayed to accompany my son for he seemingly very dislike his mother’s relative caring him now.peaceful but lively evening benight the familiar mall and soft feelings float in my heart.no matter how alien im here,i met u here and what’s in point i talked to u here so lengthy and so steamy.in a sense i had been talking to the moon in pool in night so costing so impassioned.i do it,i like it,and i m to reap it.

instable cafe administrative system alarmed me and shut down in a second and let me lose all my wordings.so here another hour.

i seemingly had not too much to say.i broke my neck to look forward ur comment but in vain.i scanned all visiting blogger’s galleries,but assured none in pictures similar to ur image in my heart.maybe u in face to face deface urs in shot,then i think i can only wait ur knock on my door.i had to obey ur timetable.for god let me older and eagerer.

baby,i likely run out of words.daily murmur made me dull.but thats only way i can occupy u right now.

bye.kiss u.i love u.

9:05 PM

Thursday, September 07, 2006
turning out to be gloomy but now shining.
sorting music box.

needless to complain about my blunt brain in the morning and afternoon after posting here and on bed in dorm,ur bland mute had let any complains meanless.the sunset sick in the red clouds,that’s my sick pink cheek.i rush to here in pulse,linger here in gush,leave here in fuss,dumped in dorm in lush,god guide me through and seeing u,i vow in faith.

bye.kiss u.i love u like my beer.

6:39 PM

son still bright
just busy browsing visiting bloggers.bring me fresh warm wealth but without ur message let me distant in tunnel.

an hour idled browsing.im fading into mute,murmured hoarsely to inaudible.bye.kiss u.i love u.

1:22 PM

again sunny
last night i dreamed liu,the former chairman of the directorate of qrrs,in a meeting talking his bribery in the form of literature.i got up at 6:55.

morning sun mild and milky.last night after return to dorm after 9 pm,i drank a bottle of beer to soothe my lonliness.still dry air in my room listening my heart beat and every bite my miss for u in my mind.

dear,these days where have been?i check up any scent u can left in my blog but in vain.where i can find u,my girl?

bye.kiss u with pains in wound in salt.i love u.

9:17 AM

Saturday, September 09, 2006
cloudy morning but now shining.
today is maozedong’s memorial day.i spent all morning left on bed,half time listening music radio,half time in silence.love songs continued encouraging me to believe in ur love onto me but i just can’t assure.maybe i just worn,worn by ur tighten mouth,ur economics on ur offers to me the hunger.i sat now again in begging,begging ur shoestring left on the wane seashore in shoing the goose.i sat in a swarm of youngsters but i m afraid i m not young enough to be in apprentise foever without a foreseeable outlet.

bye.i’d better reply comments in my blog.kiss u.love u.

another hour passed browsing.last night my son’s mother told me he cried a long time after i left.when i talked to him at about 8:30 pm he acquainted me by hum.i love him so much.

bye.

here is the stamp of my presence in evening.refusal response upon my first attempt to blond let me sorry,what’s more she is really really beautiful and so attractive for me.god says love needs every day breeding but thirst let me indecisive now.what’s im sure is that i long females,to rid lonliness or save long depressed dream.i also sure god’s guide along my road toward my responsibility to attest my being, as his son,as his soldier,as plain truth.

bye.kiss u with sand on my lips from outside.i love u,no more no less.

11:58 AM

suuny morning returned
limp sunny morning returned to rescue me from dirty.last night i fought against bugs a long time in dark then like last time i fell into sole miss for u,i sank into serenity to recognized the daughter of a grocer near my son’s mother’s school where i with my baby son haunted and ate ice stick there,with whom i teased a lot.that let me doubting if we r simultaneously miss each other that save me from being bited by bugs via its superior power of love to the disgusting dirty of bugs’ ,or she received all bitings instead of me.i chose the former if i can choose.i got up at 7:07.and i still remembered the dream in which my working place holding a ceremony offering treat but i found no place to ate and toddled with bare feet among departments.that let me doubting if my supply was threaten by the company disputed with me.

bye,dear,kiss u.i love u as usual.

9:25 AM

blue rainy day.
barks last night let me restless.a neighbor guy even struck the wall two times to protest my radio but his real aim i think is to exert his brutality in my mind.when i got up at 7:05 i found my neck froze and had problem to turn around.near the door of the common a guy kicked forcily the door but i right mopping my eyes on stand and avoid being knock on nose.

i had a nice day with my baby son,even his cry upon my leave let me sorry.his mother first time offered night lesson and had to stay in school till 8:30 pm.i left at 5:00 pm and left my baby to the old woman he very disliked.we haunted the street in residential area when it drizzling.he let me bought 4 bottles of drink and spoilt 2 in the rain for fun but in fact to wash dirty wills from the crowd.his mother let him sleep soon after lunch and i sort her notebook aside him but he soon woke up.i gave up notebook and holding him in arms to let him continue his sleep.he again woke and turned agile after i attempt to continue works on notebook while he sleeping.my baby now very active to show his dependence on me and nothing can compare to the result of his love for his dad,me,in my heart.i think parents’ love to their baby indifferent dad or mother,but the creator’s love assimilating to god’s.i kiss my baby without reservations and always relief by god’s care for him.i love my baby so deep,not only for our kin but also his own cute,his incomparable charm,his duty shouldering our family glory and dream.nothing can square out my baby’s gravity in my heart.

after dinner,i intended to buzz my baby to let him know my presence around him even im absent,but a girl made use of the only phone in the dorm and i settled with my baby’s fate,his being blessed from god,and headed here.

baby,my kid sister,these days r hard time for me.i suffered wagging and fluctuation in our love and our marriage in view.i know u need freedom to let ur will enjoy its decisiveness,i know even i felt hard to endure loneliness and attempting to date with blonds in myspace.com after exhausting disclosure of my miss here,ur more prone to carouse in datings and tender feelings with casual friends in cyberspace.we r all free.if there is a law,its our selfishest longing for appealing soul,if there is a fate,that’s life’s burden to fullfill her missings.u left me without a cue till today,i clinged to my lost without a regret forever.that’s the start of a ordinary story we r in or not.day in and day out,i guard here in search of ur message,my lips can burnout for thirsty for u,but my eyeslid can never weighted by the dim and remote of ur trace.a heart can love,a heart of young.just set out ur sail with ur compass.ur wind favors me inward and the port is my hug.

bye.kiss u.i love u,like firefly love stary night.kiss u in the wind bring ur hairs jumped and mist on ur lips fresh.

thx god.

7:51 PM

Sunday, September 10, 2006
cloudy morning including flicering sunshine
so its a new dawn.its teacher’s day and the miserable memery of us people.i woke up and when i looked at clock its 5:55 am.i got up at 6:58.after breakfast when i used my pda found had to restore it from hard reset after being hacked to dead.i stood outside the cafe and restored it and back up but when i moved backup to a usual write lock sd card against hacking my temporarily writable sd card again wrecked.

last night i listened to music radio on bed after warmed the cleft on the heels of my drought feet in hot water and applied ointment,a song of theme of parents’ love and piety moving me,and i know i love u like my baby,i love u with all my tenderness to my baby except i want u communicate with me,with ur naughty and blunt pendency on the love between us.with my baby son i settled to let him will what he will to,without my mind eyes’ notice but with my full heart that knows and supports him whatever he will to do.with u i wouldn’t let u cruise too far from me and i need u guarding me in dark in unarmed.i also jealous toward ur any pleasure without me,even u always extend ur territory independently.baby,my kid sister,u live stronger now and i want to make use of u,make love with u.u know how lonely i was in fact; u know how i love my kingdom like my family,u know how i love u in my blood,u know how far a time past since i united with all my being as a whole with u inside, with the grand unutterable pleasure of being kin with god.i just need u to recall who i m and let me care my own via caring u.

bye.kiss u.i love u like the star’s cool and lasting glimpse.i also will not hesitate to chase after the blond after all.bless me with ur goodness.kiss u with tears in desert.

9:42 AM

Monday, September 11, 2006
peculiar bright sunshine at noon,tiny sun in mid sky
so dear,i m here again.sunny noon let me opener.music from radio in the late morning lessen more or less my worries about ur love for me.i was told love ,like something not countable counts while something counts is not countable,not to mean to count but counts on if u love any more.i love u like my hometown exiled me, i miss u in my farest floating dream,and my surest destiny,like death.only death can take me away in front of u and let us apart some time.u like the land on which i want to fly,u like my heel when i jump.god guides our reunification.

changing mood,however,buffets my sole heart.loneliness steals every doubts in my love to u and replaces them with relentless thirst for expedite love,for girls at hand.but the love for the blond is real,i don’t know what’s better to deal with u two,but i try my best to own both.i can’t side watch beauty around without lust,i can’t live with empty of u without clinch to a port of soul in buffets of emotional torment of loneliness,even temporary one.

bye.kiss u.i love u,in dark in light,in dim in bright.

1:05 PM

milky sunshine,a new day faint in cuelessness.
i woke up early and its 5:37 when i watched clock.i got up at 6:58.last night i fell into sleep easily.and i dreamed of exercised with some monks in prepare,one of them in family name of tu,in a shabby place in times before china’s liberation.then we slided to new china republic and witness election campaign around us.after breakfast,i listened a song lyrics “don’t compare me down,or i need only a minute to part u.” and i know i hurt two of my beloved.but what can i do?i murmured to the colorful screen in cafe all days and bled and fled as routine. last night when i clean myself a tall rough girl of somebody’s girlfriend there in the washing room in the dorm washing,really let me tremble with her smell her flesh shown out so near.i then know nothing can be compared with a girl aside u with her heart and body in ur palm.a bird at hand worth two bird in bushes,that’s definitely right.but what can cure me at present?what can compare to the sensational beauty of girl’s flesh?

bye,i under hacker’s attacks now.kiss u,i love u.

9:05 AM

a suuny day till dusk
in morning i busy with fix my pda.afternoon my son’s mother and her relative who help caring my baby son,accompany my kid brother’s wife and son to visit her stall.i held my baby son outside to sunburn.he played in the pool in the garden and giggled a lot.later he slept on my neck and in my arms.the sun just right to warm him.some cops training there in the sports yard,a volunteer socer team playing on the grass,and some dogs hunting.

i under hacks again,like in the morning here.dogs determined to bug me to test my temper to lose.

baby,bugs everywhere,threaten our peace in our love,in our miss.but water is always sinks mud.i look forward the day we laugh in our eyes face to face.

bye.kiss u.i love u.

7:37 PM

sharp sunshine all day.
its a quite warm afternoon and i cosy in sunshine till shadow of leaves scattered on my body on the bench.words posted here wildering in my mind and let me still in timespace.till,till here again and received blond’s second message with blunt refusal.its too harsh to let me run out of any wording.she said i like 80 years old with a kid.nobody telling me that,but quite some around me saying i look like 30 more.as to my late first son,that not my fault.it takes a long time to file me from a wild rocknroll fan to mild civil man,from long haired to short neat haired.local people rather traditional just loath to accept me and introduce me a wife till a divorced woman colleague introduced me one by the way in her second marriage.that year i married was my 36 years in the single world.my first baby aborted naturally for wrong sex under wrong conception about safe sex in pregnance and also after angered gravida.god took him aside him the god in his 3 month on earth in our family.that’s all pointless.what’s acute is why she hurt me so late.i can well be more sensible,more polite to know her tasteless to me.sorry for all caring me,sorry for god,sorry for my defacement to his glory and our endearment and selfrespect.

but i m not totally lost.i live with love in itself.

after all,its nice day.i shouldn’t complain bad weather ahead in good weather.so let it be.

bye.love u in peace.

5:36 AM

Tuesday, September 12, 2006
soft tending sunshine in the morning
i gotup at 7:04 am.its a dreamless night except wake of the refusal woke me up in mid night,as far as i know.the refusal from the blond,jamie,ruined my balance and i check fatetelling soft in anxiety and was told safe with cautions.

i again under hacks.

i m to care my baby.bye.kiss u in peace in blizzard.i love u that in peace.we surely enjoy harmony and placation in our relation in our life.

9:10 AM

Wednesday, September 13, 2006
hot bright sunshine at noon.
i woke up at 8:35 am and got up at 10:19.last night i drank some beer,first at dinner in the need of bless,second in dorm in sorrow after posting here.bright sunshine since it tinted the curtain in my awake gaze on bed.i listened to the radio music since getting up.two songs elaborated on emotion and love.jamie called me a freak two times,and saying my old and to be older.i don’t konw why god let me so odd and lonely so far,in every adequate age i was left in a dim corner lonelily watching endorsed staging in limelight.when i assured enough to demand my share in love with girls and in place on the social ladder,i was told i was too old.is that fair?i don’t think so.will i cowarded into mute?no.

fight is routine for soldier.i needn’t accord or concord.world trapped with love,why i loose and single outside.broken heart need reunite,why my tears scattered all over my pits?

sunny sky and sunny air accord my wish.

bye.kiss u.i love u in peace.

1:28 PM

sunny till machine dog swarmed us.storm brewing.
it can be a nice day except in late afternoon some cops training in the sports yard and partaked the yard with a herd of elemental school students there playing socer when i let my baby son playing there.when i ready to leave a little boy playing basketball talked to me and we delayed to play socer with him and his pal.some cops then surrounded us.clouds then gathered till i returned and dinnered.now sunshine through the cloud but wet clouds covered most of the mid sky and a storm in anticipation.my baby cried loudly but the old woman just hide him in the garden to avoid he sight my leaving,shits,my baby needn’t be cheated to calm down.i left in advance to hand in fee for cable tv for his mother.

so its final time between jamie and me.she warned me with the penalty from ‘authority’ to prevent me from replying her.sorry.sorry for her losing temper.i just didn’t believe my losing.so,let it be from now.

dusk marching.i felt sorry for my future.selecting road following god is not as easy as picking a job.i was left with god,i was chosen for the sole role.

bye,i love u,no more no less.

6:56 PM

sunny all day.
so its evening now.i sat in the dark on the second floor of the cafe,even hacked and bugged so long but for miss of u i lingered here.the more i read yingying’s blog at http://yingyingxin.blog.sohu.com/ the more i felt my hope for my beloved sinking.the star still so bright and so cool,but its just so far and so quiet.music still talking to me,but i m more and more unsure about if i m her only audience.my road so far sometimes unreeled in front of my mind but i just smell a soundless laugh.i still sense and in faith, but evil sometimes shakes me into chill.i still under god’s guide,but the rocky road just spites me.

under hacks and bugs.

bye.i love u.kiss u with dignity and love.

after all complains,i will head high in next morning.let me be.bye.

another hour started at 20:50.i can’t help wildering yingying’s blog and her friends’ blogs and decided to rid them from my mind so as not to distract my pure admire for my beloved,girl zhou.for i would not accept my beloved among them.i demand my beloved to be pure for me,to be pure ferfect for me.

bye to all temps.

i have it.i have my girl in crown, in my kingdom or in god’s kingdom.

6:30 PM

Thursday, September 14, 2006
a perfectly sunny day.
last night i dreamed of a carpenter,likely my uncle i never seen,worked in our home with a radio.i played with my radio but he let me lower my radio’s volume.i felt very gloomy for my job’s perspective in the dream.before this i dreamed of our college alumni gathered and those earned much in dominating post treating us and they even dosed some drugs.while i with my wife miserablely tried lots of means to make a living in the dream.i got up at 6:57 am.

then i head to see my baby son.its a sunny day from dawn to dusk.we toddled almost 7 hours outside all day.morning we played with a burning weed heap the gardener set and emitted a lot of smoke.then we played in elders’ gateball yard,where he made a water for the cold those aged brought onto him.when i holding him waiting his mother on the mall he slept and till a middle aged dog irritated him to waking up,he slept about half an hour.at lunch time i busy helping his mother deal with her notebook.in the afternoon,when we arrived the sport yard the machine dog again marched into there.so we left and went to south garden,where he insisted standing in front of three hooligans and stared them.then we played on the rim of the fountain.he giggled a lot with plunging an stick from an ice stick we ate into the water while i shouted ‘za(prickle)’ aside.when its 4 pm,we went to his mother’s school whose gate underwent renovation and a heap of sand there.he played with sand with great joyes.it really took him a lot of exercise to carry sand and scattered far aside.the watchdog of the school watched from our back and let my baby son mouthwatered a lot by his dirty will.we received his mother in the school.when his mother started to bath him i returned to the dorm.i had a beered dinner to thank given such a nice day.

dear,my girl zhou,so many years turn before since i started to search u via web.my confidence on ur back waned in these days surrounded by dogs and bugs.i know god’s attending us but he also knows how i need ur message now.in near cold wind,i need ur whistle of fidelity.on every pale dawn,i need ur warmth of presence.

bye.kiss u,my girl.i love u.kiss u with lavender smoke we gathered today.god bless us.

7:35 PM

Friday, September 15, 2006
sultry day brewing storm.
in late morning i haunted here to download the upgrade of the php web application my son’s mother adopted.after lunch i went to the libray of qrrs to borrow some computer magzines then headed to my baby son’s mother’s home.on the way a cop haunted around me for quite some times appeared and a police car ported under the building where our home located.today they r grinning to chin,for hacked me so tensively.they destructed the database when i almost called an stop to the upgrade to the website,just to showing the abused power of the state in their steeling hands,and their foul nose mousing everywhere in the aim to daunt cowards.dogs and bugs still now licking and biting here in the cafe around me.they r step by step installing all their weapons on their paws till entrenched with bare failure with their bare corpses all over.god’s laughing.but what can i do along the dogs and their host desperately showy around?let its way.

bye.i love u.like the moon light in autumn night,dry and clear.kiss u with pantings.

7:01 PM

Monday, September 18, 2006
sunny day as usual.
yesterday i worked out from 9 am to 9 pm to upgrade the website on my son’s mother’s notebook,except a dinner break.today i had to withdraw some money from my salary card i let my son’s mother hold in advance,for i ran out of board and lodge budget.my son took a bottle of soft drink in the morning and cried sometimes upon my delayed buying him ice stick.then the siren in memory of 9.18 bellowed in the air of everywhere and we sight the students of my son’s mother’s school summoned and pledged in the theme of trust.my son’s mother then approached us and lent me some money.with the money i bought my son an ice stick and i fed him by mouth to mouth as usual,and a cup of jelly and let his mates envy very much when he ate aside a sand heap where some boy kids and a girl kid playing there.and that’s our happy morning.we received his mother on the mall and returned together.my son soon slept after his mother breasted him.at lunch i busy boasting my works on her notebook and almost spoild our delicious lunch including steak stew.afternoon i busy on cataloging family album digitally but soon my baby son woke up by battery alarm of the notebook.he played with his mother’s relative awhile letting me work alone in his room.then we went out again.i bought him a bottle of water and a little bag of peanuts.he played quite some time alone on the grass between 2 residential buildings.then we haunted the south garden,where a couple shoting their wedding memories with full putons.we played on the ladder of the tablet,an old woman talking a lot with my son but i hardly understood what she talking in odd accent.then his mother arrived.she left the meeting of her school in advance.we all glad to see each other.

i m under attacks again.

bye.kiss u.i love u with patience and pains.

7:26 PM

Wednesday, September 20, 2006
another sunny morning
i woke up at 7:14 am and got up at 8:17.another member of the room seldom returns or stays entered and made some cracks with his drawer.i dreamed of a male teacher in my elemental school in family name liu,talking about my composation and handwriting.then i found lots of wet soft scars of large area can be teard off on my right arm esp. on the root end of it,and other parts of my body,like worse vaccine effects.i asked about it to my wife in dream and she replied its liuyingzi,i don’t know what its of a liuyingzi.

these days i felt lazy to get up as soon as i woke up.i doubting if the neighbors’ ill wills’ infected me.the neighbor of my near side likely hooligans tentatively arranged there aiming me,they seemed seldom leave their room in the dorm all time,and esp. when i was at room.they sometimes tentatively shown me who they r among inhabitants in the aim to let their doggings dwell in my mind.

morning sun like an peaceful infant.but intricate dreams not lead me in wildering joy upon dawn it should.but after all i know nothing can stain the full landscape we have.

under attacks now.

bye.kiss u.i love u no matter chill or hot.

9:57 AM
Thursday, September 21, 2006
sunny autumn morning.
i got up at 8:02 am after woke up by phone call from my son’s mother inquiring instalation of soft.again dreamed a lot of familiars.last night just after i returned from xinqiang internet cafe just outside of the dorm zone i was reminded to doubt if i hurt others with my determination.the cafe i haunted,starsee cafe,nowaday seemingly seen many empty seats.last night when i posting in xinqiang cafe a guy first attacked me dirty mentally then soon abused and left after i defended myself.that left me doubting if most custumers of cafe just haunted there to fuck around.

now i m in another cafe,yiyou(righteous friends),farer from the dorm and near the working place i once worked.it charges 1.5 yuan for an hour but its monitor very large,likely 19 inch.i can say its cozier but i still favor cafes charging 1 yuan.but likely china sank into inflation nowaday.i heard agriculture products improving their prices.xinqiang cafe also charges 2 yuan for lcd monitor and 1 for traditional crt monitor.

bye.kiss u.i love u.no sooner no later.

10:12 AM

sunny day.
maybe i can call it a busy day.after posting i headed to visit my baby.he was sleeping when i arrived.so i start to sort pda warez i downloaded and moved to my sd card.when i almost finished it my baby woke up and walked beside me and stuck his head out paralleling with me and smiling await my notice.when i found him he beamed so warm that let me almost sorry and lost in moving.in the rest of the morning i had to fight against his cries for my caress to finish my work.at lunch his mother brought a notebook of her colleague to let me restore its infected os,then i found its original os cd is linux with backup while now its os is winxp.so i was assured that their notebook were ‘benchmarked’,i mean hacked.

we went out lately at about 2:30.i bought him a bottle of juice,a cup of jelly,an ice stick.the grocer woman commented my baby’s face very likes mine.when he ate the jelly a long queue of pupils passed us and we divided them in the mid.then we went to sports yard.when i open my pda to watch time the cops nearby immediately soft reset it to remind me their presence.i really didn’t notice them then.so we went to south garden where we played with water in fountain with our juice bottle for some time and some mothers and grandmoms watched me around,which common for us.then again a swarm of pupils entered the garden and scattered everywhere.some of them brought notes with them,likely an practise of outdoor observation.the director of the garden shouted to the dean,a tall woman,claiming the children can lead danger to the garden,esp. the aged,and blamed her not inform him in advance.in my view its just a trick to showy his charging,like any cadres of nowaday china raptured in their power.i witness aside and sometimes want to calm him down but fianlly give up.i love the blue sky and the sun and the children like flowers,but them just kept in close rein in nowaday china.from kindergarten to elemental school to middle school,all with steel door locked inside,in the title of security.in fact,china ‘secured’ by machine dog to smother.like internet cafe everywhere in the hand of relatives of cops,all under the title of censorship for the sake of mindless and mind-needless parents to bankrupt the quality of service and freedom of life.

this post is first time posted in another cafe near the dorm.its service likely inferior and bugs everywhere.but till now i seemingly didn’t being hacked.

bye.kiss u tender.i love u with dry cry in daytime in colorless autumn.

6:56 PM

Friday, September 22, 2006
2 days before dogs’ hunting.
2 days passed just attempting prepare a clean pda.yesterday i busy from morning to a full used afternoon to prepare installing a clean os of my ppc but just when i finished and underwent backup,the sd card was hacked or formated and lost all my works.i busy to restore it when my son with the old relative returned from outside and its already 5:20 pm and more.i had to consoled my baby craving for my caress to finished my ongoing work.then its 6 pm and i worried about my bike whose front tyre leaked in the morning and when i held my baby outside to see it it indeed empty.then i held my baby receiving his mother in her school at 7:00 pm.for its late to let the bus out of service,i ported in my baby’s mother’s home a night.this morning i continued to work on pda till i felt ready to install all programs in a safe place,then i returned to the dorm.i rest on bed for an hour then felt the sportyard of qrrs is a good place to operate on my pda,for its spaciousness can kept monitoring equipments invalid.i installed on my pda there where a chorus practised there.but again i found my newly installed os infected.so i returned to my baby’s mother’s home again,now that she also hope me attending baby in the afternoon and rest tomorrow.this time i operated on the stairs and seemingly less phenomenon of being hacked.i returned after 5:30 pm.

bye.i love u.kiss u with rest of fatigue.

8:06 PM

Saturday, September 23, 2006
peaceful sunny day.
last night slept lately around 11:30.this morning i restlessly want to prepare myself a clean and ready pda.so i went to qrrs’ free cafe but found its out of service.then i headed to starsea cafe and download some stuff i wanted to update and attempt to move to one of my sd card to install but failed,likely i wrongly set the sd card read only via software protect.but i redeemed being hacked so i shift to No.2 dorm and found a room open where a guy on pc.for unknown wrong settings i again failed.returned to my room and played with pda and just after i restored os from writeproof sd card and reboot my sd card missing! then i tried another sd card,it read.then i let the wrong sd card writable and in a minute it appeared in the device list but there is nothing on it.just in the moment it lost all data i had worked 2 days on.neighbors furied seemingly.i decided returned to my baby’s mother’s home again.when i arrived there,her mother and the wife and baby son of my kid brother already there.i prepared all cabs and went to the ground garden to install again.and all seemingly smooth with cautions.then my son’s aunt buzzed in and let them eat out.i backup the pda indoor where my baby’s mother tutored a girl student.she headed to the restaurant before me 15 minutes or so.i finally finished all installation and backup.so i also went to the restaurant.they chose a closet with 2 tables,one we occupied and another empty yet.when i almost finished my dinner the neighbor customers arrived,some men and some women.my baby son started to be irregular.his aunt commented we spoilt him for before we couple arrived he quiet.i held my baby went where he liked and found many male customers bare their chest,ie.half nuked and haunted around.that let me unpleasant.i felt waited enough time outside and return but found their still there eating,except the aunt missing.i irritated and cursed his mother.she didn’t repent and breast my baby and he soon slept.i left abrupt.i even envisioned its a plot from dogs union,with which the aunt(my baby’s mother’s kid sister) likely familiar.

i returned and enjoyed settled pda while waiting daily bless phone.but it didn’t ring.so i buzzed in and no one received.so im here.

i love u.no matter how far u were,i stretched out to read u.kiss u with beaming smiles.bye.

10:08 PM

Sunday, September 24, 2006
an ordinary sunny day
these days played with warez.last night i lately enjoyed my settled pda,reading the bible and found peace.this morning i woke up at 9:20 and start to read the bible at once,till felt thirsty for spiritual works.so i headed to the cafe to search english version of ‘communication with god’ whose chinese version i almost finished on.an hour passed in vain but reapped their aftermate works from the same author in chinese version.then i went to free cafe of qrrs to sort downloaded but can’t help continuing search as soon as siting there.last night i skim my posting within chinaren alumni on my pda i backup several days ago and found lots of typos but i think its better let it be to reflect my clumnsiness then, and needless to say machine dogs’ breaking in anonimity.afternoon sunlight witnesses my reading on the bible on the bench in the garden till my pda run out of battery power.in the morning i worried about my baby’s suffering due to the adverse environment,but it disappeared after i immersed in messages from the bible.god arrives when i in need of him.i really felt entertained by the convenience of pda.

tomorrow i will see my baby son.i will compensate him all my absent attendance in these busy days on my pda harrassed by dogs with full time caress for him.in fact in late days he started to play with other members of the family and left me alone.i love him so much,and i from the button of my heart don’t worry his forture or fate but i ought to do my best to lead him a more enjoyable way through his infantile years in the world which he to steer.

bye.i love u.

here another hour at 10:11 after i successfully backup my pda again with some customise and adding spiritual works i got today onto my frequently broken sd card.dubious persons around me when i hided in a far residential area in the opposing side of the dorm along the main street to operate after cleaning myself and exchanged daily bless with my baby son and his mother.i now felt really cosy,mostly for the successful backup.i failed so many times near the dorm.i know i will win under the bless of god’s message,and i indeed.thx god.

my udisk is full,so i likely can’t download any more.so i really don’t know how to kill this hour.maybe i will leave in advance.

i love u,baby,these days a tall girl with longer wrest dwelled in the washing room and met me times.i really in need of women,u know,she was rough, i can only felt more thirsty.god feeds everybody,but i only want my share of love and my girl and my peaceful family.why u detain my pleasure with u in our family in communion?

these days i returned to starsea cafe.the first day i return i was not showily hacked,then being hacked showily in the after days.i now being bited.

bye.god bless u to miss me.god let u sniper in cloak my misery of missing u and longing for the female.u know i will revenge u with deeper and everlasting love with u after we united.

bye.kiss u with fig leaves.i love u under the light of god’s dome,like lavender’s perfume in the autumn sunshine.

11:12 PM

Monday, September 25, 2006
rainning morning,sunny afternoon
i got up at 7:33 am.and finding its raining to wash dirty wills from surrounding last night to me and my baby.when i arrived at my baby’s home,he was in the old woman’s laptop being fed.he didn’t run into my embrace as usual as soon as catching sight of me.i kissed his leg as usual.then i holding him rambling,and let him play if he liked.he usually liked to mess cooking utensils and i just let him play with them.the old woman urged him to sleep but he slept lately after 11:00.i in fact sometimes itching to backup my pda but i held back my eagerness.i held him in sleep in my arms with quilt till his mother returned.she was obviously unhappy with me.she directly went to bed and refused to coorporate with me to let our baby sleep on bed.till she finished her lunch and went to bed again i laid my baby on bed and he woke up soon.i then finished my lunch and busy with backup pda.just when i almost finished it the sd card wrecked again.i don’t know if its a problematic card or my pda was hacked remotely by machine dogs.i was left to copy all backup again to it which cost me 3 hours and more to fill 1 gb disk.how can i complain with usb 1.0 and likely poor perfermance of card reader and the card itself.when i intended to leave i met my baby returned with the old woman from outside on the ground and i changed my mind to hold my baby outdoor till his mother returns.so we start our journey.he asked for a bottle of juice and a ice stick.he spoilt most of the juice on the rim of a garden where some aged sat.he practised walking on and climbing the rim for quite some times.he succeeded mostly except 2 times failed under attacks from persons surrounding illwilledly.his mother found us when we sat on a forklife in her school near the renovating door.she rushed to leave and let me pick her bike and i lost them in the crowd of receiving parents and i returned directly.

i waited for battery charge.his mother didn’t buzz in as usual.i buzzed in to inform her.she lately replied.she might suffering at a loss in the aim to reunite our family.then i went out to continue backup my pda and when finished backup and moving the backup to my sd card it finished,but when i powered off to unplug it to set it writeproof,it again wrecked.shits.i checked web for the problem but in vain.i more believed its infected by virus put on it stealthily remotely by cops.for just when i plug it in to my pda it immediately hanged.its all hackings,i know.

dogs nearby biting.

i here again in yiyou(righteous friend) cafe,fed up with being hacked in starsea cafe.

bye.kiss u with slaver.i love u in stary sky.hope u can see.

11:38 PM

Wednesday, September 27, 2006
brilliant sunshine at noon
last night i read my letters for u from my blog on my pda lately.this morning i got up after 7 am and continued to read them.quite some typos in them,no fault when jamie says i’d better learn more english to type correctly to let her understand more than 2 words.some errors let me surer that my posts were broken by breakers,ie. dogs union.after all,we all got it,under god’s guide.

i rambled outside of starsea cafe after lunch for about an hour.for im not urgent to utter.but many of its customers leaving in the end.and its neighbor vender,a funeral service agancy let lots of its young pals cleaning lots of dirty carpets outside and let out lots of dusts.so here again in xinqiang (newly strong) cafe also near the dorm,with whom i was attacked in my first time here several days ago.as soon as i settled a bug crawled to my hand,leaving foul smell.and i immediately being attacked.

i had not too much to utter now.settled pda really relieved me.i enjoyed it in the shine on bench in the garden in the morning till lunch time.recent nights witness my peacer sleep than before,and i know i left them behind more and more distant.that’s growup.god let us experience anxiousness,tensions,restlessness,just to let us witness the more and more opening peace on the land in the opposing side.through these negative feelings we made use of our will to choose the feelings we prefered to stay and to be what we want to be.from the early years in dark in mud,i learned more and more that we grow up in a faster pace in plenty in cares for the wider timespace of the universe than our animosities.we r to cradle the world.that’s our responsibilty.

bye.i love u.kiss u with dry tears in sunshine.

2:07 PM

sunny day,can be more sunnier.
i got up at 7:33.i immediately moved to the bench in the garden to sunshine.then in a pulse i headed to computer market intending to buy myself a sd card reader.in the market mall at the entrance of lift a cop in uniform left.i copied files on the sd card which can’t be found on my pda to the vender’s pc and found some of them can’t be copied.the copy cost a lot of time which i granted as usual but the vender suggested for a change of new and returning the wrecked to its manufacture and i accepted her suggest gladly.i test the new one and found it costs 40 minute to copy 500Mk,speedier much than the wrecked.then i went to my baby’s mother’s home and copied the missing files.in the afternoon,i cared my baby in sunlight full time.we ate peanuts,sunflower seedings,and ice stick as usual,against his mother’s warn.my baby slept later after 4:30 pm and woked by dogs among the crowd of parents receiving their children.

i felt so glad that i drank a bottle of beer at dinner.no matter if the machine dogs plotted it or plotted to pit me into anxiousity upon everyone,i adopted the convience of a speeder and a healthier sd card.

under attacks now.i m again in starsea cafe.

bye.i love u.kiss u with light heart.

7:19 PM

Thursday, September 28, 2006
cloudy morning,sunny afternoon
i woke up at 7:55 am and got up at 8:40.it was cloudy then,hardly any sunshine.i went to see my baby son at once.when i arrived he slept in the arms of the old woman who was watching tv.so i launched to update my pda with two softs,pocket earth and chess,and backup again.first time backup failed indicating infecting.then the old woman went to gerocery and locked the door too loud to wake my son up.i held him in arms to let him continue his sleeping and also attempting to operate on my pda,that woke my baby soon up.but i finished backup in time and started to let my son play with what he liked to play with.then his mother returned and told me our baby last night had problem to sleep and his mother had to hold him in arms to let him sleep.he got a little bit cold now,sneezed and running nose.i just consoled my wife take it ease for she condemned its my fault to let him sleep outside the day before yesterday.when we finished our lunch my baby irregular so we couple decided to hold him out in advance.we went to icbc bank to withdraw money from my salary card to deposit fix term for our baby’s education,according to quicken’s arrangement of financial plan.we each deposit 200 yuan a month for his college education.waiting his mother operating in the bank i hold my son to the nearby gercery shop to buy him a bottle of juice and a ice stick for my baby turned irritated by a nearby islamic restaurant.his mother got angery as soon as catching sight of the ice stick and left abrupt.but that not daunted us,we in fact ate 3 ice stick in the afternoon,spoilt 2 bottle juice and a bottle of water.when i waved the swing with my baby on my neck soon after his mother left,he slept on my neck.i at once move to sunshine in basketball yard and strode back and forth within the yard.soon some illwilled aged sat on the edge of the yard and loudly urged me to return to home.for my baby on my neck i can’t reply and they started to curse me.they woke up my baby 2 times but i determined to ignore these human’s dirty willes and rest in god’s dome.when they cursed me with pretended authority’s tone i left to avoid.we walked on another lane of the sports yard and my baby still slept on my neck till a middle aged woman asked to lend me a hand to shift my baby down but i refute and likely she exerted illwill behind us and let my baby wake up.

after all its a nice afternoon.we had good time in south garden.my son let me pennyless.but i still ate a banquet with a fish and beer at dinner in the common.

under attack now.

bye.kiss u with placation.i love u,with placation again.last night i buzzed my old father in my hometown in a mountain village in east of hubei province,central china and promised paying him a visit as soon as i being with u.sure he sees u and the day.

6:48 PM

 

sunny day but indoor clean posts.

 

last night i check up my posts in blogs on my pda till 1:00 am.the neighbor hooligans stayed waiting after i went to sleep.they let my pda hanged 3 or more times.today i got up after 10 am.and headed to see my baby after lunch.the old woman held my baby outside letting me busy with sorting the cleaned posts.later my son’s mother returned with our son and the old woman with fruits dispatched by her school.my baby started to not to operate on pc.he insisted played with household utensils and mess a lot.i had a shower in the public bathroom after his mother returned.and even its late i changed to a cafe near my baby’s home to surf to avoid the dogged cafes near the dorm.
bye.i love u.today i frequently felt ur hostility, i don’t know if it comes from u or manipulated by dogs.seemingly light only in the end of the tunnel.kiss u with sunlight.

 

Friday, September 29, 2006

a busy day preparing move to blogcn and blogger

 

since last night being dogged till afternoon when online.just felt sohu forever inferior to yahoo and in the hand of machine dog really disgusting.
this afternoon i went to my baby’s mother’s home again to use the pc.my baby these days suffers running nose.when i almost finished my work the old woman and his grandmom returned from outside and wanted him to sleep but he just didn’t with me.i had to care him playing with salt jar.he scattered salt all over and felt happy.when i attempted to move him away he cried.so i held him to receive his mother nearby.on the ground in dark dusk we met a neighbor little girl of garde one student of elemental school.he peacefully sat on my neck watching the girl practise ticking feather ball.his mother still felt at a loss upon her failure to reunite our family,i guess,and cold shoulders to me.i left them on the ground.its 7:00 pm when i passed the rail station near the house.
bye,dear.i will do my best to migrate my letters to blogcn.com and blogger of google.i think they r more trustworth.i love u,under the sky of god’s love to everyone appeals.kiss u with wheat juice.

 

Thursday, September 28, 2006

cloudy in morning,sunny afternoon.

 

i woke up at 7:55 am and got up at 8:40.it was cloudy then,hardly any sunshine.i went to see my baby son at once.when i arrived he slept in the arms of the old woman who was watching tv.so i launched to update my pda with two softs,pocket earth and chess,and backup again.first time backup failed indicating infecting.then the old woman went to gerocery and locked the door too loud to wake my son up.i held him in arms to let him continue his sleeping and also attempting to operate on my pda,that woke my baby soon up.but i finished backup in time and started to let my son play with what he liked to play with.then his mother returned and told me our baby last night had problem to sleep and his mother had to hold him in arms to let him sleep.he got a little bit cold now,sneezed and running nose.i just consoled my wife take it ease for she condemned its my fault to let him sleep outside the day before yesterday.when we finished our lunch my baby irregular so we couple decided to hold him out in advance.we went to icbc bank to withdraw money from my salary card to deposit fix term for our baby’s education,according to quicken’s arrangement of financial plan.we each deposit 200 yuan a month for his college education.waiting his mother operating in the bank i hold my son to the nearby gercery shop to buy him a bottle of juice and a ice stick for my baby turned irritated by a nearby islamic restaurant.his mother got angery as soon as catching sight of the ice stick and left abrupt.but that not daunted us,we in fact ate 3 ice stick in the afternoon,spoilt 2 bottle juice and a bottle of water.when i waved the swing with my baby on my neck soon after his mother left,he slept on my neck.i at once move to sunshine in basketball yard and strode back and forth within the yard.soon some illwilled aged sat on the edge of the yard and loudly urged me to return to home.for my baby on my neck i can’t reply and they started to curse me.they woke up my baby 2 times but i determined to ignore these human’s dirty willes and rest in god’s dome.when they cursed me with pretended authority’s tone i left to avoid.we walked on another lane of the sports yard and my baby still slept on my neck till a middle aged woman asked to lend me a hand to shift my baby down but i refute and likely she exerted illwill behind us and let my baby wake up.
after all its a nice afternoon.we had good time in south garden.my son let me pennyless.but i still ate a banquet with a fish and beer at dinner in the common.
under attack now.
bye.kiss u with placation.i love u,with placation again.last night i buzzed my old father in my hometown in a mountain village in eastern of hubei province and promised paying him a visit as soon as i being with u.sure he will see the day.

 



et cetera